Forsaken City
A garden poem.48 total reviews
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I don't think the Garden of Eden failed God, I think humans with their arrogance failed God and continue to do so today. We haven't learned our lesson, yet. Thank you for reposting.
I don't think the Garden of Eden failed God, I think humans with their arrogance failed God and continue to do so today. We haven't learned our lesson, yet. Thank you for reposting.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2023
Comment from Aiesha Nichole Oliver
Oh my, so angry! I was thinking you really f-ed up those flowers! Eden, the failed Nirvana? Perhaps there'll be more to smile about if you plant more flowers and grow something beautiful with kindness. Seems some dessert is in order or a bag of chips if citrus fruit is rotting.
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reply by the author on 14-Aug-2023
Oh my, so angry! I was thinking you really f-ed up those flowers! Eden, the failed Nirvana? Perhaps there'll be more to smile about if you plant more flowers and grow something beautiful with kindness. Seems some dessert is in order or a bag of chips if citrus fruit is rotting.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2023
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2023
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And what did you think of the meter perfection. A poetry site not a messaging site. I just added to your limitations. ee
Comment from Boogienights
You write ao vividly, I can picture this place, rotting fruit and all. I think if we could find the garden of Eden, or Noah's ark, it might be a catalyst to people believing. Just a thought.
You write ao vividly, I can picture this place, rotting fruit and all. I think if we could find the garden of Eden, or Noah's ark, it might be a catalyst to people believing. Just a thought.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2023
Comment from Nina Sexton
I have to ask. Are you entering your work for other publications? You've got to have enough for a whole book to release. It's incredible how all your work just blows my mind. I can recommend some entry sites if you're interested? Have a great day.
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2023
I have to ask. Are you entering your work for other publications? You've got to have enough for a whole book to release. It's incredible how all your work just blows my mind. I can recommend some entry sites if you're interested? Have a great day.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2023
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2023
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Well, Nina, Ann Sexton along with Sylvia Plath are two of my favorite post-modern poets. You have a gallant last name friend. I am just FS old timer. My publishing poetics conflicts with what I do publish. This, poetry, is my escape from the rudiments of my avocation. lol I am honored friend. easy
Comment from royowen
I've often wondered it feels like to be wealthy enough to keep everybody else at bay, and feel happy about it, to look down and say, I am where I should be, while others squirm in their useless existence, however death is the great equaliser, where everybody is naked and exposed. Well done, be blessed, Roy
I've often wondered it feels like to be wealthy enough to keep everybody else at bay, and feel happy about it, to look down and say, I am where I should be, while others squirm in their useless existence, however death is the great equaliser, where everybody is naked and exposed. Well done, be blessed, Roy
Comment Written 14-Aug-2023
Comment from Lisasview
Just got this in my Fan "box"
I think it would be great if you could let your readers know where the inspiration for your poem come from.
Although I do read all your poems and I realise that many are full of metaphors, I do wonder ...
Lisa
Just got this in my Fan "box"
I think it would be great if you could let your readers know where the inspiration for your poem come from.
Although I do read all your poems and I realise that many are full of metaphors, I do wonder ...
Lisa
Comment Written 14-Aug-2023
Comment from karenina
Depressing that all you wrote in 2017 seems magnified times 100 in 2023...
Alternative facts abound...that "Confederate rose" is a Hibiscus...
It goes down the slippery slope from there.
Revisionist history is, by definition, fiction...
One day, perhaps, we will learn!
Karenina
Depressing that all you wrote in 2017 seems magnified times 100 in 2023...
Alternative facts abound...that "Confederate rose" is a Hibiscus...
It goes down the slippery slope from there.
Revisionist history is, by definition, fiction...
One day, perhaps, we will learn!
Karenina
Comment Written 14-Aug-2023
Comment from GWHARGIS
This was a different shot of the Garden of Eden. It was after the apple party. The rotting fruit. The harsh light of day. All rolled into the mistake of man. How quickly man decided he /she knew what was best. We probably should have learned but no such luck. Great poem. Gretchen
This was a different shot of the Garden of Eden. It was after the apple party. The rotting fruit. The harsh light of day. All rolled into the mistake of man. How quickly man decided he /she knew what was best. We probably should have learned but no such luck. Great poem. Gretchen
Comment Written 13-Aug-2023
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent description and word imagery. Good alliteration. Our world is a mess and soon inhabitantable and divided. But there's hope.
Gypsy
"What a long strange trip it's been" - Jerry Garcia
Excellent description and word imagery. Good alliteration. Our world is a mess and soon inhabitantable and divided. But there's hope.
Gypsy
"What a long strange trip it's been" - Jerry Garcia
Comment Written 13-Aug-2023
Comment from Michelle D. Carr
This one is for reading over and over and something is exposed each time. The gardens an cities are the places but the history of each is significant. Wonderful imagery.
This one is for reading over and over and something is exposed each time. The gardens an cities are the places but the history of each is significant. Wonderful imagery.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2023