FAMILY TIES.
Viewing comments for Chapter 98 "I Do""ALL IN THE FAMILY."
3 total reviews
Comment from Sharon Haiste
Telling a clear story, with meaning, using fifty 'R' words is not an easy thing to do.
You've done it well.
Good luck to you in the competition.
Sharon
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Telling a clear story, with meaning, using fifty 'R' words is not an easy thing to do.
You've done it well.
Good luck to you in the competition.
Sharon
Comment Written 01-Nov-2017
Comment from Juliette Chamberlain
Clever construction using continuous, consecutive initial letter for each word. Do I think this adds anything to the poem? No, in fact it makes for difficult reading and feels very forced, but it does convey the message well.
Warmly,
Juliette
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Clever construction using continuous, consecutive initial letter for each word. Do I think this adds anything to the poem? No, in fact it makes for difficult reading and feels very forced, but it does convey the message well.
Warmly,
Juliette
Comment Written 29-Oct-2017
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
I think your piece could do with some punctuation. it would certainly help with any pacing and the flow/meaning.
it is certainly very clever and well worked out.
there is some repetition in here and need to remove the errant speech mark here - "Rhonda, rebuke rejects reprieve reprieve restores Reggie's-Rhonda's romantic relationship.
 |
Hi there,
I think your piece could do with some punctuation. it would certainly help with any pacing and the flow/meaning.
it is certainly very clever and well worked out.
there is some repetition in here and need to remove the errant speech mark here - "Rhonda, rebuke rejects reprieve reprieve restores Reggie's-Rhonda's romantic relationship.
Comment Written 29-Oct-2017
