Fear Is Present In The Air
Answer needs to be growth not destruction45 total reviews
Comment from sharonlshelley
nice poem really enjoyed the read really very true and love the picture you chose for your work it goes well with it, thanks for sharing your work .sharon
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
  |
nice poem really enjoyed the read really very true and love the picture you chose for your work it goes well with it, thanks for sharing your work .sharon
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
-
Thanks for the comments.
Comment from Sis Cat
Yes, build new monuments of growth and power over the old views. This is a deep and well timed poem about the violence surrounding whether or not to remove Confederate monuments. Your poem addresses the rampant fear in the air and asks us to seek answers inside and hear a solution--build new monuments.
Thank you for sharing your poem.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
|
Yes, build new monuments of growth and power over the old views. This is a deep and well timed poem about the violence surrounding whether or not to remove Confederate monuments. Your poem addresses the rampant fear in the air and asks us to seek answers inside and hear a solution--build new monuments.
Thank you for sharing your poem.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
-
Thanks for the comments.
Comment from nancyrabbrose
I like the message in your poem. I think it would be even better if you were to try to write that message in blank verse. It seems that some of the rhyming is forced and if you were to just write blank verse, give the same message, you could get a 6 star poem. That is only my opinion. I thank you for the great message.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
|
I like the message in your poem. I think it would be even better if you were to try to write that message in blank verse. It seems that some of the rhyming is forced and if you were to just write blank verse, give the same message, you could get a 6 star poem. That is only my opinion. I thank you for the great message.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
-
Thanks for the comments.
Comment from Dean Kuch
I'm not sure if this is supposed to be a free verse offering or a rhyming poem, Dan. It seems to be a hodge-podge, jumbled up mixture of both.
The topic is similar to the last poem I just read by you.
I stand by what I stated in my last review. The tearing down of what some consider offensive statues will do nothing to rectify or help remember the past.
~Dean
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
|
I'm not sure if this is supposed to be a free verse offering or a rhyming poem, Dan. It seems to be a hodge-podge, jumbled up mixture of both.
The topic is similar to the last poem I just read by you.
I stand by what I stated in my last review. The tearing down of what some consider offensive statues will do nothing to rectify or help remember the past.
~Dean
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
-
Thanks for the comments.
Comment from Wendy Winter
I read this from top to bottom then felt compelled also to read it from bottom to top. I did this after realizing each line has such deep meaning it can stand alone. Whenever someone treats me with prejudice I think of all those who suffered repression under evil dictators. I like your words inhuman monsters. We have to recognize them before we can hope to defeat them.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
|
I read this from top to bottom then felt compelled also to read it from bottom to top. I did this after realizing each line has such deep meaning it can stand alone. Whenever someone treats me with prejudice I think of all those who suffered repression under evil dictators. I like your words inhuman monsters. We have to recognize them before we can hope to defeat them.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
-
Thanks for the comments.
-
You are welcome.
-
You are welcome.
Comment from Daniel Silverhawk
It is true most of our monuments seem to rise from some type of fear or past violence. But I took this poem to be more personal. The monsters we have become. As though inhuman, we have become calculated beasts, driving fear into the hearts of society. Build new monuments. Rehabilitate and teach these criminals to be socially acceptable. Growing our children to follow in the steps of the new monuments rather than in the ways of yesterdays fears. Nice poem changing fear into hope. I pray I did not read too much into this.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
|
It is true most of our monuments seem to rise from some type of fear or past violence. But I took this poem to be more personal. The monsters we have become. As though inhuman, we have become calculated beasts, driving fear into the hearts of society. Build new monuments. Rehabilitate and teach these criminals to be socially acceptable. Growing our children to follow in the steps of the new monuments rather than in the ways of yesterdays fears. Nice poem changing fear into hope. I pray I did not read too much into this.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
-
Thanks for the comments. I like your take on the poem and only wish I consciously did write this deeper theme. I was writing more of an answer to build real monuments alongside the old ones instead of tearing them down.
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
"Fear Is Present In The Air", is a well-written and interesting piece. In my opinion though, this poem would benefit with more stringent editing. Re-reading and re-writing is never wasted.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
 |
"Fear Is Present In The Air", is a well-written and interesting piece. In my opinion though, this poem would benefit with more stringent editing. Re-reading and re-writing is never wasted.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
-
Thanks for the comments.
-
danpald, you're very welcome.
Best wishes, the Duchess
Comment from patcelaw
We have so many advantages in our lives here in America, that much of the world is struggling just to get food to eat. And yet so many are unhappy with their lives and turn to drugs and booze or they turn to violence. Patricia
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
|
We have so many advantages in our lives here in America, that much of the world is struggling just to get food to eat. And yet so many are unhappy with their lives and turn to drugs and booze or they turn to violence. Patricia
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
-
Thanks for the comments.
Comment from c_lucas
Is this free verse or rhyming verse????
If it is the former, you need a rewrite.
If it is the latter, you still need a rewrite.
Put your poetic talent to use.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
|
Is this free verse or rhyming verse????
If it is the former, you need a rewrite.
If it is the latter, you still need a rewrite.
Put your poetic talent to use.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
-
Thanks for the comments.
-
I srewed up on this and I apologize.
Comment from Thal1959
I don't think I have reviewed a work of your for awhile, Dan. I understand where you are going with this. There is not much that can be done because the "non-violent" more conservative side remains feckless in the face of liberal aggression. It is just too easy to see the similarity in the left seeking any reason to rewrite the past - and in a more negative light - to the smashing of historical statues by ISIS.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
|
I don't think I have reviewed a work of your for awhile, Dan. I understand where you are going with this. There is not much that can be done because the "non-violent" more conservative side remains feckless in the face of liberal aggression. It is just too easy to see the similarity in the left seeking any reason to rewrite the past - and in a more negative light - to the smashing of historical statues by ISIS.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
-
Thanks for the comments.
-
You're welcome, Dan.
