Winter-scape in Blue
After a big storm beauty abounds.38 total reviews
Comment from pipersfancy
I love the morning following a big snow storm. Getting up early, and everything is beautiful, still and pristine.
A suggestion for consideration:
Drifting snow draped fallow fields,
all artist-drawn with little shape.
vs
Drifting snow draped fallow fields,
all artist-drawn with (softened) shape.
- there's lovely consonance with the f/s sounds (driFting/Snow/Fallow/Fields)- it might be nice to carry it into the next line with a word such as SoFtened.
Best of luck with your contest entry,
pf
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2017
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I love the morning following a big snow storm. Getting up early, and everything is beautiful, still and pristine.
A suggestion for consideration:
Drifting snow draped fallow fields,
all artist-drawn with little shape.
vs
Drifting snow draped fallow fields,
all artist-drawn with (softened) shape.
- there's lovely consonance with the f/s sounds (driFting/Snow/Fallow/Fields)- it might be nice to carry it into the next line with a word such as SoFtened.
Best of luck with your contest entry,
pf
Comment Written 27-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 27-Jul-2017
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Thank you so much, pipersfancy, for your terrific review. I did not hesitate to use your suggestion in my poem (see the new version). One key word can make all the difference and "softened" was a marvelous choice. Many, many thanks!
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This speaks after a big storm beauty in Nature enhances afar and beyond the horizon, everywhere it appears blue in winter as bluish cold is evident; I liked.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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This speaks after a big storm beauty in Nature enhances afar and beyond the horizon, everywhere it appears blue in winter as bluish cold is evident; I liked.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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I am delighted you enjoyed "Winter-scape." Thank you for sharing.
Comment from pome lover
that is absolutely delightful!
perfect meter, lovely descriptions written with lyrical, picturesque words. A joy to read! Especially since today it was 100 degrees where I live and humid!
Beautiful poem. Well done.
pome lover
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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that is absolutely delightful!
perfect meter, lovely descriptions written with lyrical, picturesque words. A joy to read! Especially since today it was 100 degrees where I live and humid!
Beautiful poem. Well done.
pome lover
Comment Written 26-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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I am thrilled you like "Winter-scape" so much. It was extremely hot & humid when I wrote it. I had only the picture to inspire me. Thank you so much for sharing and your wonderfully kind praise and that bright gold star.
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well, then you've got a great imagination!
Comment from PoemsOfDD
This is a great entry for the color blue contest. You have done an excellent job describing a ferocious scene to a picturesque one. The first line really captures the feel of the storm - very effective - while the end stanza beautifully concluded this fine poem.
"as snow globe shaken flakes still fell" - love this line.
Best of luck in the competition. ~DD
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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This is a great entry for the color blue contest. You have done an excellent job describing a ferocious scene to a picturesque one. The first line really captures the feel of the storm - very effective - while the end stanza beautifully concluded this fine poem.
"as snow globe shaken flakes still fell" - love this line.
Best of luck in the competition. ~DD
Comment Written 26-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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I had reservations when I wrote the first stanza and am thrilled you like it so much. Thank you for your very kind praise. I must admit that the line you like best is my favorite, too.
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Thank you for sharing. It's a pleasure to read well crafted poetry. :-) ~DD
Comment from Irish Rain
This is such a strikingly beautiful entry. Your words are inspired, and you have chosen the loveliest picture, and blue print, an awesome presentation!! Blessings...
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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This is such a strikingly beautiful entry. Your words are inspired, and you have chosen the loveliest picture, and blue print, an awesome presentation!! Blessings...
Comment Written 26-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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It is so exciting to hear one's poetry called "inspired." I immediately want to write a sequel. Thank you so much, Irish Rain, for your wonderful review.
Comment from moonsunrise
I truly loved reading your vividly descriptive poem and especially liked the title you chose. After the ferociousness of the storm it is so true how beautifully clean and serene the sapphire blue landscape becomes. The tree covered branches covered in white, and the new fallen snow, both symbolic of renewal and/or new beginnings.
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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I truly loved reading your vividly descriptive poem and especially liked the title you chose. After the ferociousness of the storm it is so true how beautifully clean and serene the sapphire blue landscape becomes. The tree covered branches covered in white, and the new fallen snow, both symbolic of renewal and/or new beginnings.
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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I truly appreciate your very perceptive analysis of my poem. Thank you so much for the wonderful commentary.
Comment from Dean Kuch
This is a lovely, well written poem for the colour blue contest, Anonymous Poet.
Vivid imagery portrayed of a winter wonderland.
Some nice alliteration with "fallow fields."
Well done, best of luck!
~Dean
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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This is a lovely, well written poem for the colour blue contest, Anonymous Poet.
Vivid imagery portrayed of a winter wonderland.
Some nice alliteration with "fallow fields."
Well done, best of luck!
~Dean
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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Thank you so much, Dean, for sharing "Winter-scape" and your lavish praise.
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The pleasure's all mine. :)
Comment from Janilou
Such beautiful imagery. For a moment I felt like I was there, watching those snowflakes fall.
I have just one suggestion:
The cabin on the blue-tinged knoll
seemed lost and stranded nestled there
until one spied the chimney smoke
now swirling, curling in the air.
I'm not sure if you are using a particular rhythm, but I thought the word 'nestled' might work better in the first line:
The cabin nestled on the blue-tinged knoll
seemed lost and stranded up there
until one spied the chimney smoke
now swirling, curling in the air.
I wish you every good luck in the contest.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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Such beautiful imagery. For a moment I felt like I was there, watching those snowflakes fall.
I have just one suggestion:
The cabin on the blue-tinged knoll
seemed lost and stranded nestled there
until one spied the chimney smoke
now swirling, curling in the air.
I'm not sure if you are using a particular rhythm, but I thought the word 'nestled' might work better in the first line:
The cabin nestled on the blue-tinged knoll
seemed lost and stranded up there
until one spied the chimney smoke
now swirling, curling in the air.
I wish you every good luck in the contest.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2017
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I am delightful you enjoyed the imagery of "Winter-scape," Janilou, and appreciate your suggestions. The rhythm I chose was mostly iambic, and every line is tetrameter. Although I do like the first line of your rendition, it is pentameter, thus too long.
