Comment from Thal1959

Excellent

You threw me for a loop here, Patty. When I read the title, I couldn't help but think of Alice in Wonderland going down the March hare's hole. But your is somber, if not a tad depressing. The pic should have clued me in.

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2017

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2017

Hi there; you are so right - the title is misleading, but the picture told of what was coming. Thank you for reading and reviewing. I hope I didn't depress you too much,

~patty~

reply by Thal1959 on 27-Jun-2017

No problem, Patty - just an impression on my part.

Comment from hari anand

Excellent

I can relate to this feeling ...I call it sinking feeling, it pulls me down to nothing. .still we face this darkness for no reason. Beautifully written.

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2017

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2017

thank you so much for the lovely review. I appreciate your time to read and comment,

~patty~

Comment from Leena

Excellent

An excellent cinquain! The message is that of utmost sadness and despair but you have penned down the emotion beautifully well. Even the artwork you have chosen for your poem says a lot. I believe once we get pulled down till there is nothing, i.e. once we hit rock bottom, the chances are that we bounce back! All we need is a bit of hope and faith. Wishing you happiness...Regards.

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2017

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2017

Hi Leena; thank you so much for the lovely review. I appreciate your warm words of encouragement. For the record, I'm feeling much better now,

~patty~

reply by Leena on 28-Jun-2017

Happy to know dear😊
Have a wonderful day!

Comment from francesca7

Excellent

I am learning about so many different types of poetry sinced I joined Fanstory. This is another new one for me. I suffer from migraines and I have to admit it the words and picture resonate exactly how I feel before I feel one starting. I love the words......"spiraling to the depths"..

Your achievements are many and I can see why. Blessings to you.

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2017

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2017

thank you so much for the lovely review and words of encouragement,

~patty~

Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)

Excellent

A classic cincquain with a twist, this is beautiful, modern, dark, pithy and gloriously written. Very imaginative and full of feeling. I enjoyed this very much well done and kindest regards Meia x

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2017

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2017

Hi Meia; thank you so much for the lovely review. I'm glad you liked the poem,

~patty~

Comment from kathleenspalding

Excellent

Well written Cinquain Poem is an excellent description of despair. Excellent use of (really creepy!) artwork, colors and visual display. Thank you for writing and sharing. Recognizing the beast is half the battle.

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2017

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reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017

Hi Kathleen; thank you so much for reading and reviewing. I appreciate your kind words of encouragement. You are so right - the picture was a bit creepy!

~patty~

reply by kathleenspalding on 28-Jun-2017

You're welcome. :-D

Comment from Linda Hughes

Excellent

I think this cinquain is very well crafted. It gives a sense of what it might be like if someone knew death was upon her/him, and described what it felt like to die. Kind of foreboding. Good poem with a thrill of something dark.

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2017

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reply by the author on 28-Jun-2017

thank you so much for your thoughtful review of this piece,

~patty~

Comment from Bill Schott

Excellent

This cinquain, Down the Rabbit Hole, has the right structure and presents the downward sense of chasing an idea to its negative ends that may not allow a routs back.

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2017

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2017

Hi Bill; thank you so much for the lovely review. Your comment inspires me to write another poem as a bookend, 'Up from the Rabbit Hole,' to illustrate how to come back from nothing. Thanks for the idea,

~patty~

Comment from rtobaygo

Excellent

Good morning, Patty

I see a dark threatening image of one awaiting their fate. Reminds me of the saying:
Abandon all hope ye who enters here (I hope this is the saying). One heck of a picture...really compliments the poem.

Take care and stay safe,

Ray

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2017

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2017

Hi Ray; thank you so much for the lovely review. I think you have the saying right - I'm glad you liked the presentation, as well as the poem,

~patty~

Comment from Heather Knight

Excellent

I like the way this poem is structured: you start with a negative word (darkness) and finish with another negative word (nothing). Very nicely rounded.
I also like the title you've chosen, reminiscent of Alice In Wonderland.
Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2017

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2017

Hi Maria; thank you so much for the lovely review,

~patty~