From out of the Grayness
Viewing comments for Chapter 54 "Pinball life"Reaching from the gray areas to understand life
27 total reviews
Comment from Ronni
Very provocative life story dear Vance, and a enlightenment and education
on the venerable pin ball machine. Always fascinated me, but never
played one to amount to anything; too impatient I guess. But wow,
what a lesson and marker in your life the pin ball machine was; most
intriguing indeed! And the added memoir of your youthful days at
Snow Water lake...nostalgic, wistful, spiritual and as always profoundly
conveyed. Thanks for sharing friend...Best of luck in contest.
Blessings, best wishes, Ronni
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2017
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Very provocative life story dear Vance, and a enlightenment and education
on the venerable pin ball machine. Always fascinated me, but never
played one to amount to anything; too impatient I guess. But wow,
what a lesson and marker in your life the pin ball machine was; most
intriguing indeed! And the added memoir of your youthful days at
Snow Water lake...nostalgic, wistful, spiritual and as always profoundly
conveyed. Thanks for sharing friend...Best of luck in contest.
Blessings, best wishes, Ronni
Comment Written 25-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2017
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Oh Ronni, dear one...you are sooo sweet and I thank you so much for this lovely review and beautiful stars! Blessings and Hugs, dear one! HIS GRAYNESS; Vance
Comment from F. Wehr3
I thought this was an interesting entry for the contest, Vance. My suggestion would be to make an actual paragraph or paragraphs out of the first part and the go into your poem. You may want to wrap it up with another paragraph tying the two parts together. Best of luck!
Take care,
Russell
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2017
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I thought this was an interesting entry for the contest, Vance. My suggestion would be to make an actual paragraph or paragraphs out of the first part and the go into your poem. You may want to wrap it up with another paragraph tying the two parts together. Best of luck!
Take care,
Russell
Comment Written 25-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2017
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Thanks so much Russell, for this great review and stars, much appreciated! HIS GRAYNESS: Vance
Comment from lalajovanoski
Hello my dear friend I really enjoyed reading this beautifully written piece I think that the content is very good in the story is told very well the structure and flow is done very nicely I think that this will do well in the contest good luck to you God bless you love la la
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2017
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Hello my dear friend I really enjoyed reading this beautifully written piece I think that the content is very good in the story is told very well the structure and flow is done very nicely I think that this will do well in the contest good luck to you God bless you love la la
Comment Written 24-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2017
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Thank you so much La la, for this very generous and lovely review! It is sincerely appreciated and I'm glad that you enjoyed it! It is always a delight to hear from you in both reviews and your writings! Thanks always, HIS GRAYNESS: Vance
Comment from Jay Squires
Comparing your young life to a pinball machine, now that's an evocative premise, Vance. Of course, "life" was your green youth. The way you used the various aspects of the pinball game as extended metaphors for yourself and your environment was brilliant. As was how your developing maturity discovered the flaw in the metaphor. There was no reset! It was then that the maturing man faces the past child with the implied question: "Is the man you are today what you could have been, given different choices."
As a spiritual touchpoint of metaphor "Snow Water Lake" comes to represent the tranquility where you can grow to your fullest IN THIS LIFE ... and contains the deeply religious connotation connecting Snow Water Lake with everlasting life.
Truly, truly inspiring, Vance. My sincere misgiving is that the judges might consider the poetic format as disqualification of this as "a story."
One small nit: "As natures plan has taken sure it 'toll " [As NATURE'S plan ... ]
This is a winner, in any sense!
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2017
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Comparing your young life to a pinball machine, now that's an evocative premise, Vance. Of course, "life" was your green youth. The way you used the various aspects of the pinball game as extended metaphors for yourself and your environment was brilliant. As was how your developing maturity discovered the flaw in the metaphor. There was no reset! It was then that the maturing man faces the past child with the implied question: "Is the man you are today what you could have been, given different choices."
As a spiritual touchpoint of metaphor "Snow Water Lake" comes to represent the tranquility where you can grow to your fullest IN THIS LIFE ... and contains the deeply religious connotation connecting Snow Water Lake with everlasting life.
Truly, truly inspiring, Vance. My sincere misgiving is that the judges might consider the poetic format as disqualification of this as "a story."
One small nit: "As natures plan has taken sure it 'toll " [As NATURE'S plan ... ]
This is a winner, in any sense!
Comment Written 23-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2017
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My goodness,Jay! What a profound and remarkable review (which YOU should be getting six stars for!! I'm astounded, delighted, and blessed all in one review,,never before achieved on FS! Thank you so very much! I really loved this and admire your writing and perspectives as always. BLESSINGS! Vance
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Vance you were worthy of that and more.
Jay
Comment from Spitfire
What a fantastic and creative metaphor. You've outdone yourself, Vance.
Williams machines
Tested my daily togetherness
During boyhood years
When my eyes and heart searched for structure
(This makes an abstract concept concrete.)
my time with you was best
The lake and park and cottage friends
Shall live within my soul while getting old
(A profound observation)
The images that stay with me are summers at our lakeside cottage--the greatest gift my father gave to our family--buying the property.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2017
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What a fantastic and creative metaphor. You've outdone yourself, Vance.
Williams machines
Tested my daily togetherness
During boyhood years
When my eyes and heart searched for structure
(This makes an abstract concept concrete.)
my time with you was best
The lake and park and cottage friends
Shall live within my soul while getting old
(A profound observation)
The images that stay with me are summers at our lakeside cottage--the greatest gift my father gave to our family--buying the property.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2017
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Thank you SWEETHEART!! For this really lovely and uplifting review! You always ring my bell and make me smile even if it's raining doo doo, which it's doing right now at the hospital, in Roanoke, Virginia, as I'm waiting for my stepmother to move on to heaven. You made my day, a lot brighter as you ALWAYS DO! BLESSINGS, HUGS, AND LOVE ALWAYS! Vance
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How lucky your stepmother is to have you by her side.
Hugs to you too,
Shari
Comment from crich
Your free form thinking, which moves us from your delightful memories of the amusement park to the metaphors of the pinball machine and the self reflective poem is very much a metaphor for all stages of life. Well done!
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2017
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Your free form thinking, which moves us from your delightful memories of the amusement park to the metaphors of the pinball machine and the self reflective poem is very much a metaphor for all stages of life. Well done!
Comment Written 22-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2017
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WoW- crich, what a delight to meet you and thanks for the lovely review! I'm sincerely delighted for your generous comments and stars and eager to see you again soon. I will come around and visit your works as well. Blessings, new friend....don't be a stranger! HIS GRAYNESS; Vance
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written story of your life and how your boyhood taught you the lessons of life at the pinball table. The only difference real life cannot start from over when everything is done.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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A very well-written story of your life and how your boyhood taught you the lessons of life at the pinball table. The only difference real life cannot start from over when everything is done.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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Thank you Sandra, for this glorious review and six stars! It is warmly and greatly appreciated! I saw the contest challenge for a story about one's self and just had to give thanks for my delightful childhood growing up in an amusement part by a lake in Pennsylvania. I was captured by the challenge of the pinball
machines in the penny arcade and then later in life wrote a poem entitled PINBALL LIFE. So it seemed a good fit for this contest and I thought I would give it a try. I hope every reader enjoys it as much as you! and as much as I ENJOY YOU! MY NEW BEST FRIEND! Blessings and Hugs! Vance
Comment from lyenochka
Impressive, Vance! I really liked your definition of the various parts of pinball and using it as a metaphor for life. I never played it except once on a computer. Today, kids play computer games and probably will one day remember playing with fondness but they didn't learn the skills of hunting for coins to play.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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Impressive, Vance! I really liked your definition of the various parts of pinball and using it as a metaphor for life. I never played it except once on a computer. Today, kids play computer games and probably will one day remember playing with fondness but they didn't learn the skills of hunting for coins to play.
Comment Written 21-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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Thanks lyenochka, for your generous review and stars and I am sincerely honored and delighted that you enjoyed my work! I hope to see you again often and look forward to visiting your works as well! HIS GRAYNESS: Vance
Comment from Irish Rain
Wow. Great story Mr. Vance. Where was this 'Snow Water Lake?' It sounds like a MAGICAL childhood. I would have loved the searching for dropped coins!! When I was young...I used to go to the laundromat...they stored a mountain of old school desks inside. I'd climb into that mountain, hide, and eavesdrop. I was so bad, ha ha. Blessings...
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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Wow. Great story Mr. Vance. Where was this 'Snow Water Lake?' It sounds like a MAGICAL childhood. I would have loved the searching for dropped coins!! When I was young...I used to go to the laundromat...they stored a mountain of old school desks inside. I'd climb into that mountain, hide, and eavesdrop. I was so bad, ha ha. Blessings...
Comment Written 21-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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Hi, Irish Rain! Thanks so much for this fine and generous review and stars! The lake I'm referring to is in , Western Pennsylvania, and named 'CONNEAUT" which in origin of the Indian lingo,, means 'Snow water Lake. I lived there from early childhood through 5th grade, then family move on to western NY. and no more pinball machines! Many thanks and so glad to hear from you always! HIS GRAYNESS: Vance
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Sounds wonderful!!
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Vance
Loved your story of you youth and THEN how you found that poetry as you got older filled you life as you said-
From beginning of challenges on the pinball machines, then to the blessings of Poetry.
Nice very nice
Gert
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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Hello Vance
Loved your story of you youth and THEN how you found that poetry as you got older filled you life as you said-
From beginning of challenges on the pinball machines, then to the blessings of Poetry.
Nice very nice
Gert
Comment Written 21-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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Thank you dear one, for this lovely and generous and uplifting, encouraging review! I so sincerely marvel at your poetic talents and am humbled by these lovely six stars! Blessings and thanks always AND LOVE INDEED! Vance
