Perennials of War
Viewing comments for Chapter 30 "Chapter Neun part drei"Is Anderson a gallant knight? Can he recover Shan
28 total reviews
Comment from Sankey
Top chapter, again. One of my wife's doctors here at the hospital is an orthodox Jew. A lovely young man. A great read and so glad Shana's caretaker is meeting her family. Now I think I can put another of my offerings up again.
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
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Top chapter, again. One of my wife's doctors here at the hospital is an orthodox Jew. A lovely young man. A great read and so glad Shana's caretaker is meeting her family. Now I think I can put another of my offerings up again.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
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Thank you for the kind review. My primary doctor is Jewish..
Comment from Mustang Patty
Its surprising to learn that Shana's family really doesn't care about recovering the painting. However, there are a great many people that don't or didn't care about the treasure that was lost - they were just grateful to be alive. Thank you for this chapter - I look forward to more,
~patty~
I didn't see any nits or SPAG
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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Its surprising to learn that Shana's family really doesn't care about recovering the painting. However, there are a great many people that don't or didn't care about the treasure that was lost - they were just grateful to be alive. Thank you for this chapter - I look forward to more,
~patty~
I didn't see any nits or SPAG
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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I think that's what Shana's father is thinking. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ric Myworld
Thanks for sharing another fine chapter. I'm a little concerned as to why the bad guys wouldn't have taken Shana's father and brother captive or something other than just harassing them, but I'm sure if I'll just sit tight and be patient the answers will come. Great job.
(add)
In ran Shana and threw her arms around her dad and kissed his cheek.
(This is a simple change, but rewriting this sentence might be more effective."
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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Thanks for sharing another fine chapter. I'm a little concerned as to why the bad guys wouldn't have taken Shana's father and brother captive or something other than just harassing them, but I'm sure if I'll just sit tight and be patient the answers will come. Great job.
(add)
In ran Shana and
(This is a simple change, but rewriting this sentence might be more effective."
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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I will fix that sentence. I rewrote it at the last minute and still didn't get it right. I appreciate the help. The bad men might have kidnapped them, if Jeff wouldn't have shone up.
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You write wonderfully, and I seldom see anything that I don't thoroughly enjoy. And besides, you're the teacher. I'm a humble wanna be who only makes suggestions trying to be helpful, and it definitely doesn't mean I'm right about any of them. I'm just attempting to bring things to your attention, should you want to make a change. :-)
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
I'm glad her dad knows where she is and what she's up to. Makes me feel better. She has been trusting a total stranger she met literally in the street! Ben says he doesn't care about the painting, so why does Shana care?
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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I'm glad her dad knows where she is and what she's up to. Makes me feel better. She has been trusting a total stranger she met literally in the street! Ben says he doesn't care about the painting, so why does Shana care?
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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Shana has an enter justice system and it will come out later listened to stories about her family being treat unfairly told by grandparents, her little old Jewish grandma. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Curly Girly
I enjoyed reading this smooth flowing chapter, no spags noticed. Yes, divorce is a terrible thing, but the Jewish man, Aaron, seemed understanding about it. It's clear that the daughter loves her father.
Nicole
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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I enjoyed reading this smooth flowing chapter, no spags noticed. Yes, divorce is a terrible thing, but the Jewish man, Aaron, seemed understanding about it. It's clear that the daughter loves her father.
Nicole
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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I was hoping to portray that. Thank you.
Comment from c_lucas
There are several denominations in the Jewish system. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read. Your post has very good imagery.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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There are several denominations in the Jewish system. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read. Your post has very good imagery.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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You're correct and Shana's church is very traditional. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Sasha
I think it is good that Shana's father and brother have met Anderson, I am sure now they will feel more secure about her safety. I only fond one spot you may want to look at:
Philip leaned for waiting for a... I think you meant to say leaned 'forward'....
I didn't find any other mistakes or corrections that were needed.
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reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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I think it is good that Shana's father and brother have met Anderson, I am sure now they will feel more secure about her safety. I only fond one spot you may want to look at:
Philip leaned for waiting for a... I think you meant to say leaned 'forward'....
I didn't find any other mistakes or corrections that were needed.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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I sure did. Thank you for the kind review and catch.
Comment from royowen
So now as well as Shana's brother we have her father, Benjamin involved, they've been approached by the Russians, but were ordered off by Jeff, with a gun, the mafia wanted access to Shana by her father, where to from here, Barbara, excellent scribing, well done, blessings, Roy
Typo : why does that man have (a) small hat?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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So now as well as Shana's brother we have her father, Benjamin involved, they've been approached by the Russians, but were ordered off by Jeff, with a gun, the mafia wanted access to Shana by her father, where to from here, Barbara, excellent scribing, well done, blessings, Roy
Typo : why does that man have (a) small hat?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
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Thank you for the kind review and catch. I appreciate the help.
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Most welcome
