My Book of Poems 2010-2017
Viewing comments for Chapter 46 "The Titanic"a collection of my poetry
25 total reviews
Comment from MsPetra
Nice! I like this offering. It says a lot with so few words. I wish you the best of luck in the contest. You have nailed the structure. Well done on that regard.
Please keep writing. I am looking forward to future offerings from you.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
Nice! I like this offering. It says a lot with so few words. I wish you the best of luck in the contest. You have nailed the structure. Well done on that regard.
Please keep writing. I am looking forward to future offerings from you.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
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thank you
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello, my friend,
Good job with the syllabic count and presentation. Good topic, the sinking of the titanic was a definite catastrophic event in history, not a 911 call but well within the contest rules.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
Hello, my friend,
Good job with the syllabic count and presentation. Good topic, the sinking of the titanic was a definite catastrophic event in history, not a 911 call but well within the contest rules.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
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thank you
Comment from lyenochka
That explains it all. I like how the first line emphasizes the mistaken over-confidence which was the biggest problem. Then the ice and the sinking gives the ending. Good story told in so few words.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
That explains it all. I like how the first line emphasizes the mistaken over-confidence which was the biggest problem. Then the ice and the sinking gives the ending. Good story told in so few words.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
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thank you
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
Wow, this is utterly fantastic! Such a sad story rendered in a fantastic poem so cleverly written. Good luck with the competition this is fabulous well done kindest regards Meia x
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
Wow, this is utterly fantastic! Such a sad story rendered in a fantastic poem so cleverly written. Good luck with the competition this is fabulous well done kindest regards Meia x
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
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thank you
Comment from Dean Kuch
Yes, Patty, one ice burg was all it took to sink the unsinkable cruise ship/luxury liner known by all who sailed and loved her as, quite simply, "The Titanic."
The engineers design, with four separate compartments in her hull, actually led to her sinking so quickly.
Great choice of disasters.
Good luck in the contest.
Anchors away!
~Dean ;)
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
Yes, Patty, one ice burg was all it took to sink the unsinkable cruise ship/luxury liner known by all who sailed and loved her as, quite simply, "The Titanic."
The engineers design, with four separate compartments in her hull, actually led to her sinking so quickly.
Great choice of disasters.
Good luck in the contest.
Anchors away!
~Dean ;)
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
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thank you - not sure how you knew who it was - are you psychic? Or just wise?
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Both, and you're welcome.
~Dean ;)
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Oh, and humble, too
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Absolutely. ;)
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a great job with your contest entry. Your lines/syllables are correct.
I like the word 'so' in your lines. It ties the 3 lines together.
Best wishes in the contest. Jan
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
You did a great job with your contest entry. Your lines/syllables are correct.
I like the word 'so' in your lines. It ties the 3 lines together.
Best wishes in the contest. Jan
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
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thank you
Comment from Laurie Clayton
Hello there,
Good entry for the contest... form and syllable count conform to the rules of the contest.
Thank you for sharing, and Good Luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
Hello there,
Good entry for the contest... form and syllable count conform to the rules of the contest.
Thank you for sharing, and Good Luck in the contest.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
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thank you
Comment from apky
And it is said the cause was
The tip of an Iceberg
Sad as it might sound that
Something so huge
got crushed by something
that it should have crashed
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
And it is said the cause was
The tip of an Iceberg
Sad as it might sound that
Something so huge
got crushed by something
that it should have crashed
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
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thank you
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
Ah yes, the Titanic. Thousands of Irishmen to build it and 1 Englishman to sink it...
I know why the 'so' is in the first line but it feels superfluous; Like 'Oh, she's sooooo unsinkable'. lol (She was considered unsinkable?)
Apart from that though good use of the format.
It's a shame that two entries decided to call their piece by the same name. Let's hope it doesn't confuse the voters.
All the best
GMG
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
Hi there,
Ah yes, the Titanic. Thousands of Irishmen to build it and 1 Englishman to sink it...
I know why the 'so' is in the first line but it feels superfluous; Like 'Oh, she's sooooo unsinkable'. lol (She was considered unsinkable?)
Apart from that though good use of the format.
It's a shame that two entries decided to call their piece by the same name. Let's hope it doesn't confuse the voters.
All the best
GMG
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2017
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thank you sooooooooo much
Comment from Vijay Kumar V
Beautiful, really this is skill to write a complete expression in such few syllables. Thanks for sharing. A great contest entry. Have a great day. Namaskaram
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2017
Beautiful, really this is skill to write a complete expression in such few syllables. Thanks for sharing. A great contest entry. Have a great day. Namaskaram
Comment Written 25-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2017
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thank you