Act of Endurance
Viewing comments for Chapter 23 "Spider and the Fly"Dawn of Chaos
26 total reviews
Comment from Raul1
I like how you structured this poem. You have expressed emotions throughout this poem. I like this poem. Thanks for sharing! No grammatical errors. Nice work!
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
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I like how you structured this poem. You have expressed emotions throughout this poem. I like this poem. Thanks for sharing! No grammatical errors. Nice work!
Comment Written 20-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
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Just of the thought of no errors was worth hearing, suffering hard with flaws throughout my writes, thanking you for your generous rate and touching views.
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You're welcome.
Comment from mancub
your poem has potential, it is an interesting topic and story you share within, this is a bit hard to follow as it seems to ramble a bit and some of the words chosen could be refined to even this out, This is creative and interesting with a little evening out and perhaps a bit more rhyme the flow may open up a bit, Thank you for sharing, mancub
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reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
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your poem has potential, it is an interesting topic and story you share within, this is a bit hard to follow as it seems to ramble a bit and some of the words chosen could be refined to even this out, This is creative and interesting with a little evening out and perhaps a bit more rhyme the flow may open up a bit, Thank you for sharing, mancub
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
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I see your point of view, lacking the moment any written response resolving this issue, thanking you for your generous rate and touching sentiments. I will try to improve its structuring.
Comment from Maria Millsaps
Interesting story, that can be applied as a metaphor to teach people who suffer from braggadocious behavior. Nicely crafted. The picture speaks 1000 words. Good luck.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
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Interesting story, that can be applied as a metaphor to teach people who suffer from braggadocious behavior. Nicely crafted. The picture speaks 1000 words. Good luck.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
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Glad aspects in this write were captivating to your interests, thanking you for your generous rate and welcomed comments.
Comment from Earl Corp
The fly came to a very dismal horrifying end becoming spider food. I guess this proves good things comes to those who wait, the spider made out good..
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2019
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The fly came to a very dismal horrifying end becoming spider food. I guess this proves good things comes to those who wait, the spider made out good..
Comment Written 17-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2019
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That's an interesting way to see this particular event, appreciating you given this enlighted view of the occurrence, thanking you for your generous rate and warm sentiments.
Comment from Possummagic
I must admit they are not my favourite of God's creatures, however I was quite impressed in how you create an account of the life in the day of a spider! It's very descriptive and I enjoyed it very much. PM
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2019
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I must admit they are not my favourite of God's creatures, however I was quite impressed in how you create an account of the life in the day of a spider! It's very descriptive and I enjoyed it very much. PM
Comment Written 17-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2019
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Glad aspects in this write were found appealing, trying efforts by me to enhance clarity to my readers, finding hopes in certain parts being absorbed by them. Thanking you for your generous rate and warm sentiments.
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You?re most welcome. Bless. PM
Comment from Y. M. Roger
A very interesting twist on an old tale such that the spider actually engages the fly in conversation .... but eventually gets caught in his own 'story spinning' :) Thanx for sharing!
reply by the author on 08-Apr-2019
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A very interesting twist on an old tale such that the spider actually engages the fly in conversation .... but eventually gets caught in his own 'story spinning' :) Thanx for sharing!
Comment Written 06-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 08-Apr-2019
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Interesting statement not realizing your disclosed fact about it, thanking you for your generous rate and touching sentiments.
Comment from Christine Wissner
I enjoyed this very much. It was interesting and worthy of reading. Thanks for sharing your story. I think you will do well in your career as an author. Keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 08-Apr-2019
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I enjoyed this very much. It was interesting and worthy of reading. Thanks for sharing your story. I think you will do well in your career as an author. Keep up the good work.
Comment Written 06-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 08-Apr-2019
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Now that's a first "well as a author", glad aspects in this work were appealing to your interests, thanking you for your generous rate and warm sentiments.
Comment from Sandra Montanino
I was attracted to this piece by just its name. My grandmother used to tell me stories about the spider and the fly. Of course, your piece was a much more sophisticated version and very well written.
Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2019
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I was attracted to this piece by just its name. My grandmother used to tell me stories about the spider and the fly. Of course, your piece was a much more sophisticated version and very well written.
Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 06-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2019
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Glad this write is appealing, appreciating thumbs up after so many boos, thanking you for your generous rate and welcomed comments.
Comment from Randa Dayle
Hello again,
Another marvelous poem about nature. When I first saw the title I thought it would be a play on the original poem, it wasn't, and your's very fresh and imaginative!
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2019
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Hello again,
Another marvelous poem about nature. When I first saw the title I thought it would be a play on the original poem, it wasn't, and your's very fresh and imaginative!
Comment Written 22-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2019
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Glad aspects within my writes were found appealing to your interests. Thanking you for your generous rate and touching views.
Comment from kiwijenny
A fly ....a sly a dot....a roundabout...
Spider ...a pulling string...
Trapped......a web to sing......slurp spider.......I like this I can see it in my mind's eye, the dance of it...the sly and snap of the string of it...
Well penned
God bless
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2019
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A fly ....a sly a dot....a roundabout...
Spider ...a pulling string...
Trapped......a web to sing......slurp spider.......I like this I can see it in my mind's eye, the dance of it...the sly and snap of the string of it...
Well penned
God bless
Comment Written 22-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2019
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Glad aspects in this particular write were found appealing, thanking you for your generous rate and warm sentiments.
