Of Thee I Sing
Using words from some of our patriotic songs80 total reviews
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
It is rarely heard of that one admits to the mistakes of his Nation, yet every Country has a closet filled with bones. Let us say, that in spite of USA's mistakes it has maintained a greatness never achieved by any other Country. It is Globally stellar. Be proud. Your poem speaks volumes.
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It is rarely heard of that one admits to the mistakes of his Nation, yet every Country has a closet filled with bones. Let us say, that in spite of USA's mistakes it has maintained a greatness never achieved by any other Country. It is Globally stellar. Be proud. Your poem speaks volumes.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2019
Comment from Cindy Warren
It's good to own the mistakes. That's the only way to make sure they don't happen again. Elected officials need to be held to a higher standard. I don't know how to make that happen. The corruption is shameful.
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It's good to own the mistakes. That's the only way to make sure they don't happen again. Elected officials need to be held to a higher standard. I don't know how to make that happen. The corruption is shameful.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2019
Comment from Coco Jane
A scathing look at our nation's inconsistencies.
You have a few mechanical errors:
In stanza 1, "...liberty." (end punctuation belongs inside closing quotes)
In stanza 1, "...sea." (needs end punctuation)
In stanza 2, "...brave."
In stanza 3, "me," (comma always goes to the left of quotation marks)
In stanza 5, I believe the line is "God mend thine every flaw." (not "thy)
This poem certainly makes one think.
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A scathing look at our nation's inconsistencies.
You have a few mechanical errors:
In stanza 1, "...liberty." (end punctuation belongs inside closing quotes)
In stanza 1, "...sea." (needs end punctuation)
In stanza 2, "...brave."
In stanza 3, "me," (comma always goes to the left of quotation marks)
In stanza 5, I believe the line is "God mend thine every flaw." (not "thy)
This poem certainly makes one think.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2019
Comment from kiwigirl2821
Hi Jay
Frankly, I'm tired of the whining of the red man, white man, brown man, black man, yellow man and any and all shades in between. Why can't we simply accept each other with all our warts and flaws? Our lack of education, experience and persuasions. We are all who and what we are, aren't we?
We are truly in a mess methinks! Good writing my friend. Keep that voice spewing ... good luck. xoxo Kiwi
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Hi Jay
Frankly, I'm tired of the whining of the red man, white man, brown man, black man, yellow man and any and all shades in between. Why can't we simply accept each other with all our warts and flaws? Our lack of education, experience and persuasions. We are all who and what we are, aren't we?
We are truly in a mess methinks! Good writing my friend. Keep that voice spewing ... good luck. xoxo Kiwi
Comment Written 20-Sep-2019
Comment from Ogden
This is brilliant iconoclasm! The irony from the use of ostensibly patriotic song lyrics deserves recognition. Your decidedly dark humor is a hoot!
Ogden (Don)
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This is brilliant iconoclasm! The irony from the use of ostensibly patriotic song lyrics deserves recognition. Your decidedly dark humor is a hoot!
Ogden (Don)
Comment Written 20-Sep-2019
Comment from sunnilicious
I thought your poem was righteous. You are creative and expressive. The visual imagery was astounding. My edit note to you would be to place it all in present tense like "God was" to "God is" and "ancestored" to "ancestors".
Good flow of rhythm and rhymes. Meticulously picked quotes.
God bless you.
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I thought your poem was righteous. You are creative and expressive. The visual imagery was astounding. My edit note to you would be to place it all in present tense like "God was" to "God is" and "ancestored" to "ancestors".
Good flow of rhythm and rhymes. Meticulously picked quotes.
God bless you.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2019
Comment from Hitcher
A very patriotic poem Jay. I'm an Englishman by birth but live in NZ and have done for 17 years now. I was fortunate to traveled through your stunningly beautiful country in the 90's. All Nations around the globe have made mistakes in their past, it is how they move forward that defines their progress : ))
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A very patriotic poem Jay. I'm an Englishman by birth but live in NZ and have done for 17 years now. I was fortunate to traveled through your stunningly beautiful country in the 90's. All Nations around the globe have made mistakes in their past, it is how they move forward that defines their progress : ))
Comment Written 19-Sep-2019
Comment from patcelaw
Our land even with its flaws, is still the best place on which to live. As proof there are many who are taking drastic steps to enter.
This is a good poem and I sing my love for America.
Patricia
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Our land even with its flaws, is still the best place on which to live. As proof there are many who are taking drastic steps to enter.
This is a good poem and I sing my love for America.
Patricia
Comment Written 19-Sep-2019
Comment from the13thpoet
Hello again Mr. Jaybird sir, that was a brilliant piece of work there. I not only enjoyed every word, but I felt it as well. Your words have a clarity and wisdom that is so lacking in this country and world. It has always bothered me how this self-proclaimed greatest country in the world always like to brag about democracy and sweep all their atrocities under the rug. Great job my friend. Six stars all day long!
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Hello again Mr. Jaybird sir, that was a brilliant piece of work there. I not only enjoyed every word, but I felt it as well. Your words have a clarity and wisdom that is so lacking in this country and world. It has always bothered me how this self-proclaimed greatest country in the world always like to brag about democracy and sweep all their atrocities under the rug. Great job my friend. Six stars all day long!
Comment Written 19-Sep-2019
Comment from Cedar
Hello Jay: In my opinion, this one is my favorite so far. If you could just add all the corruption and back-stabbing that's going on in our White House right now this would be a masterpiece.
I believe that America is at it's very lowest right now in my 75 years. We used to be called the best nation in the world and America the great, but now most of the other countries laugh and poke jokes at us constantly. I believe that America is on a down-hill slide, my friend.
Take care...Bill
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Hello Jay: In my opinion, this one is my favorite so far. If you could just add all the corruption and back-stabbing that's going on in our White House right now this would be a masterpiece.
I believe that America is at it's very lowest right now in my 75 years. We used to be called the best nation in the world and America the great, but now most of the other countries laugh and poke jokes at us constantly. I believe that America is on a down-hill slide, my friend.
Take care...Bill
Comment Written 19-Sep-2019
