senryu (kids watermelon)
senryu58 total reviews
Comment from PoemsOfDD
IndianaIrish, a great haiku entry for the competition. Describing spitting watermelon seeds by all that join in adds to a great visual. Well done on this and good luck. ~DD
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2017
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IndianaIrish, a great haiku entry for the competition. Describing spitting watermelon seeds by all that join in adds to a great visual. Well done on this and good luck. ~DD
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2017
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Thanks for your kind review, ~DD, and I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your feedback. I'm glad you enjoyed the imagery in my watermelon haiku.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
Comment from Sis Cat
Ha! This is a good haiku. It is vivid and told a story with a surprise ending:
kid's watermelon
seed-spitting match at school picnic
teacher joins in
I love how you have fun with this. It does not feel at all like stuffy nature haiku.
Thank you for sharing. I wish you much contest success.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2017
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Ha! This is a good haiku. It is vivid and told a story with a surprise ending:
kid's watermelon
seed-spitting match at school picnic
teacher joins in
I love how you have fun with this. It does not feel at all like stuffy nature haiku.
Thank you for sharing. I wish you much contest success.
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2017
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Thanks for your kind review, Sis Cat, and I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your feedback. I'm glad you enjoyed my watermelon haiku. I'm glad you saw the fun in this haiku!
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
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Congratulations on finishing third in the contest. It is a great haiku and well-deserving of the honor!
Comment from Antoine Charlemaine
Dear seikatsu watermelon kigo hair-do person,
You are stretching the boundaries of acceptability. Did not the hair-do guru Yogi Bare (pronounced bear-ay) declare that watermelon speed-spitting contests do, in fact, fall under the gyoji-seikatsu combination jinji category? What could be more indicative of a facet of human affairs (aka gamut - fine word) than watermelon seed-spitting? If we all sat around spitting more watermelon seeds, there'd be fewer problems in our world. Did not kigo guru Yogi recognise this salient fact?
Furthermore, your basic premise is flawed. Watermelons are seedless these days, or are you, perhaps, flashing back to a childhood memory, in which you subconsciously desire a better world, where watermelon seed-spitting is the norm and acceptable code of behaviour? Is this why your teacher joins in? Preposterous suggestion under any other consideration.
Otherwise, good effort.
Guru Ant xx
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2017
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Dear seikatsu watermelon kigo hair-do person,
You are stretching the boundaries of acceptability. Did not the hair-do guru Yogi Bare (pronounced bear-ay) declare that watermelon speed-spitting contests do, in fact, fall under the gyoji-seikatsu combination jinji category? What could be more indicative of a facet of human affairs (aka gamut - fine word) than watermelon seed-spitting? If we all sat around spitting more watermelon seeds, there'd be fewer problems in our world. Did not kigo guru Yogi recognise this salient fact?
Furthermore, your basic premise is flawed. Watermelons are seedless these days, or are you, perhaps, flashing back to a childhood memory, in which you subconsciously desire a better world, where watermelon seed-spitting is the norm and acceptable code of behaviour? Is this why your teacher joins in? Preposterous suggestion under any other consideration.
Otherwise, good effort.
Guru Ant xx
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2017
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Dearest Guru...thanks for acknowledging my good effort. As much as it pains me, you're right about kids today and seedless watermelons. What a shame for the kids...missing out on a chance to spit and spit and spit without getting into trouble.
Thanks for your in-depth review of my fun haiku where even a teacher sees the fun in spitting watermelon seeds.
Smiles,
SpittingKazza
(Thanks for changing the stars...you sillyAnt)
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Dear SpittingChipsKazza,
I didn't think I was ever going to receive a reply to this troublesome review. I thought you were treating me with the contempt I deserve...
No worries re changing stars. I couldn't bear the thought I may be the cause of this fine hair do not making it into the final list. You'd never forgive me.... And your fellow hair-doers would haunt me forever... Imagine that!
SillyAnt xx
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Lol. The seed spitting hairdo got third place even tho some people didn't think it was accurate. Lol
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Third place? What does that mean? You get scored on these things? What's that based on? Not stars, I hope... :( :( :(
DevastatedAnt
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No the stars have nothing to do with winning a site contest. There is a committee that judges the entries. 1st place gets $100.00 real cash, not FS play money. 2nd gets 25.00 in FS member dollars and third gets 10.00 FS money. It's actually a huge honor to get selected because there is a large number of entries in the site contests. Free to enter and real money first prize. No one really knows how the site decides which entries get to be judged by the committee... many think it's the reviews and stars. But the site remains veal the lowest rating from an entry and maybe one high one to get an average. But no one knows for sure. So don't feel bad, okay Ant? Your fun star had nothing to do with the committee's decision. :-)
RicherKazz
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...and you've had a few first places? Wow! Do you have to get a placing for your entry to be chosen for the final book, or do only the first placers have that honour?
In any case, I shall take hair-doing much more seriously in future...or stop reviewing altogether. My paltry comments wouldn't be doing much for your cause...at all! After all, I know absolutely nothing about hair-dos. Zip, zero, zilch. :)
SeriousAnt xx (Very serious...seriously serious.)
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The haiku book has nothing to do with the haiku contest my watermelon poem was in. Two different hair styles, Ant. If you stop reviewing my scribbles, what will I look forward to? I'll just wither up with my iPad and disappear into cyberspace... crying and begging for entry back in. Think there'll be a password to get back in?? LOL
Comment from Spitfire
An interesting and welcome diversion from the worn-out form and subject matter. "kid's" implies just one child is involved. Maybe "kids'"?
This creates a humorous event. Bet the teacher would lose. LOL
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2017
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An interesting and welcome diversion from the worn-out form and subject matter. "kid's" implies just one child is involved. Maybe "kids'"?
This creates a humorous event. Bet the teacher would lose. LOL
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2017
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Thanks for your kind review, Shari, and I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your feedback and catching my possessive error. I'm glad you enjoyed my watermelon haiku and saw the fun in this one.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
Comment from Oatmeal
IndianaIrish,
You did a wonderful job with the challenge that you chose. Your theme was well defined. The meter count is correct. Telling things very plainly and comprehensibly. The artwork complements your poem.
There was no SPAG. No typos. No homophones. No problems at all.
I wish you the best.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2017
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IndianaIrish,
You did a wonderful job with the challenge that you chose. Your theme was well defined. The meter count is correct. Telling things very plainly and comprehensibly. The artwork complements your poem.
There was no SPAG. No typos. No homophones. No problems at all.
I wish you the best.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2017
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Thanks for your kind review, Oatmeal, and I appreciate your taking the time to read and share your feedback. I'm glad you enjoyed my watermelon haiku.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
Comment from Rasmine
Good haiku and I wish you luck in the contest.
I like your material. I remember watermelon seed contest--who can spit it furthest. Love it when the teacher joined in.
Happy Easter.
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Good haiku and I wish you luck in the contest.
I like your material. I remember watermelon seed contest--who can spit it furthest. Love it when the teacher joined in.
Happy Easter.
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Thank you for this great review for my watermelon haiku, Rasmine. I appreciate your taking the time to share your thoughts, and I'm delighted you enjoyed the topic of the poem. Happy Easter to you, as well.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
Comment from kahpot
Excellent sounds like a whole lot of fun very visual poem with great words very well done and good luck in your competition thanks for sharing happy easter****kahpot
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Excellent sounds like a whole lot of fun very visual poem with great words very well done and good luck in your competition thanks for sharing happy easter****kahpot
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Thank you for this great review for my watermelon haiku, kahpot. I appreciate your taking the time to share your thoughts, and I'm delighted you enjoyed the imagery in the poem. Happy Easter to you, as well.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Oh yes my friend no need for an artwork for this one a fun scene painted using this form well done and good luck regards Jill
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Oh yes my friend no need for an artwork for this one a fun scene painted using this form well done and good luck regards Jill
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Thank you for this great review for my watermelon haiku, Jill. I appreciate your taking the time to share your thoughts, and I'm delighted you enjoyed the imagery in the poem. Happy Easter to you.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
Comment from Irish Rain
Well. I did not know that! I thought haiku had to be all nature. So nice to know it doesn't! I like your watermelon haiku...it FEELS like summer!!! Happy Easter!!
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Well. I did not know that! I thought haiku had to be all nature. So nice to know it doesn't! I like your watermelon haiku...it FEELS like summer!!! Happy Easter!!
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Thank you for this great review for my watermelon haiku, Irish Rain. I appreciate your taking the time to share your thoughts, and I'm delighted you enjoyed the poem. Many people don't realize haiku covers may cover many more topics than nature. Happy Easter to you, as well.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
Comment from jusylee72
Now that really sounds like a heck of lot of fun. Kid's and watermelons and a spiting contest. Thank you for brightening the day with a playful poem about watermelons
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Now that really sounds like a heck of lot of fun. Kid's and watermelons and a spiting contest. Thank you for brightening the day with a playful poem about watermelons
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Thank you for this great review for my watermelon haiku, Jidy. I appreciate your taking the time to share your thoughts, and I'm delighted you enjoyed the poem. Your comment about the poem brightening the day sure is an awesome compliment! Happy Easter to you.
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
