Reviews from

Echoes of Artistry

Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Lured Into the Wild"
NaPoWriMo 2017

22 total reviews 
Comment from Sasha
Excellent
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I found this absolutely fascinating and full of important and necessary information should any one consider taking this obviously dangerous trip. As always, I found your poem exceptional and your notes informative. I am a cautious person and while I would love to visit Alaska, I think I will pass on this particular trip. Great work with this one and lots of new information to store in my already cluttered mind. I wish you all the best in the contest too.

 Comment Written 11-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 11-Apr-2017
    Hi again! I love Alaska. I've lived here essentially my whole life and it is a joy for me to share it with others. You'll see that a lot in my writing. You mentioned Mexico when we were talking about your name. Do you still live there? I'm glad you enjoyed this selection. The wilderness is not a place to go unprepared. Tourists find that out every year. I suppose for some that is their thrill of adventure. For me, I pack everything (and the kitchen sink, according to my husband lol) Thanks for the great comments.

    Kim
reply by Sasha on 11-Apr-2017
    Yes, I have lived in Mazatlan, Mexico since 2004. I love it here despite complaining about the heat every summer. The weather is pretty much the same year-round. We have summer which is horrifically hot, fall which is slightly cooler, winter which is about the same as fall, and spring which is slightly warmer than winter. Then it is summer again and I complain about it starting in May and continue until the end of November, when fall finally arrives.
Comment from BeasPeas
Excellent
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This is a well written poem poem with great flow and rhyming in addition to content. The warning is that newcomers must be wary of taking chances in the wilds of Alaska. I agree with that. An adventure can easily turn into a tragedy for those who don't know their way around. Marilyn

 Comment Written 07-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 07-Apr-2017
    Hi Marilyn:

    If you watch the movie, the man who gave McCandless a ride also gave him his boots before he trekked out 'Into the Wild.' He really had no clue what he was doing. Thanks for the great comments.

    Kim
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is so very well written and so very interesting too, my friend. Have you always lived in Alaska? Best wishes in the contest, my friend. This is the best one I have read~Debbie

 Comment Written 07-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 07-Apr-2017
    Hi Debbie,

    We moved to Alaska two months before my 2nd birthday and we are still living my Dad's youthful adventure. (I'm glad his wasn't just to walk out and live in the woods like McCandless.) Thank you so much for this gracious six star rating and review. I am happy that you enjoyed this selection. If you are up for a laugh, I posted a video of Robert Service's, "Bessie's Boil," in my profile thoughts. It is one of my favorites.

    Kim
Comment from Pantygynt
Excellent
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At the folk club I attend irregularly there is one guy who gives excellent recitations of Service's Yukon poetry. This was very much in the styleast. These things all perform well, better than they read I think in the hands of a good raconteur.

 Comment Written 07-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 07-Apr-2017
    Hi Pantygynt:

    I got to talking about Service with Sis Cat, who also recognized similarities to, "The Cremation of Sam McGee." Service is one of my absolute favorites, especially since growing up here. I had a teacher in 6th grade who used to read him to us, accents and all. Go check out the my profile thoughts, after that exchange, Sis Cat went and found a recording of one of my favorite Service poems that I recommended to him, it is called, "Bessie's Boil." I posted it for all to enjoy. I think you'd like it, performed by a man who used to do Robert Service recitations right here in Fairbanks at the Malemute Saloon.

    You are correct, they are best in the hands of a good performer. A serious question, in the Cremation of Sam McGee, most of the lines were right about 17 syllables, give or take a syllable here or there. Mine was about fifteen syllables per line, fourteen on a few lines. What meter do you shoot for? It really can't be iambic, not with odd syllables per line, right? If it is a long response, feel free to PM me. At any rate, I hope I haven't butchered it too much, and that you were able to enjoy the piece.

    Thanks!

    Kim

    I hope you enjoyed this one. You are right, they are best
reply by Pantygynt on 07-Apr-2017
    I listened to Bessie's boil and what is going on is a great deal of interpretation by the performer. It works like music more than strict metrical poetry. There are rests or breaks that are beyond the capacity of written metre. The are occasions where the meter says one unstressed syllable and the performance requires two rapid ones. There has to be a pact between performer and poet. In something of this length if it is 100% regular it gets boring. No it is not iambic or trochaic but leans towars an anapaestic approach with differences.
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2017
    Thank you, I would have had no clue how to describe that. I appreciate your input and hope you enjoyed Bessie's Boil.
Comment from alf collier
Excellent
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Well done!! It is not always easy to emulate a style of write, but have done this well!! It was an interesting read, and one that was well delivered!! Bravo!!

 Comment Written 07-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 07-Apr-2017
    Hi Alf,

    Thank you so much for the kind words. If you enjoy Robert Service and are up for a laugh I posted a video of, "Bessie's Boil," in my profile thoughts just for fun. I appreciate you taking the time to read and review.

    Kim
Comment from Rlegel99
Excellent
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Well written tongue in cheek poem about not being prepared to hike Alaska. Your rich word choice adds to the reader's enjoyment of this piece. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 07-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 07-Apr-2017
    Hi Rlegel,

    I'm glad you enjoyed this selection. Thanks for taking the time to read and review. I appreciate your comments.

    Kim
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
Excellent
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Wow, Kim! You never do anything half-hearted. You certainly put your all into every write, and this is no exception. Wish I had a six for you.

You retold a true story in fine style with excellent rhyme and a bit of humor thrown in for good measure. My fave line is "I'll be impressed at your willingness; and that you saved your hide". :) I had not heard this story before, and I now know what a Sourdough (the non-edible type) is, and a Cheechakoh. This is a terrific entry for the Share a Story in a Poem contest as well as a fine addition of your book.

Great job on this write, Kim!

Connie

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 07-Apr-2017
    Hi Connie,

    I'll take a virtual six from you any day of the week :) The movie has a lot of great Alaskan scenery in it. This guy, I don't think anyone really knew what he was thinking (or those that still come to basically follow in his footsteps.) Kind of crazy. Yep, Sourdough and Cheechako are two common words up here. Thank you for all of the fantastic comments. I'm glad you enjoyed this one.

    Kim
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Excellent
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River and quiver threw me off in flow but the whole piece was exceptionally done for the contest. Quite a story line and one that I never knew till now

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 07-Apr-2017
    Hi Barb,

    I appreciate your comments. I felt like it was important to use river so the reader would make the connection with Teklanika in the previous stanza. Thanks for the great review.

    Kim
Comment from Mustang Patty
Excellent
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Thank you for sharing this story within a poem. Until I read your author's notes, I had never heard of McCandless, but his tale is one that will stay with me. I think I get so angry at tourists that insist on taking these trails - only to get lost. The cost of finding them, or their remains, is usually born by the state.

Your poem moves along with rhythm and grace. The tale was well told and I wish you luck in the contest,
~patty~

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 06-Apr-2017
    Hi Patty,

    Thanks for taking the time to read and review. McCandless wasn't exactly a tourist, he was a 23 yr old who had just graduated college and got it in his head that he could just walk out into the woods and not have to live by the rules anymore. I guess that's the best way to put it. Who knows where that idea came from. His family had money and he decided to just ditch it all and go be free. It didn't exactly work out for him because he was ill prepared for any of it. I only dealt with the Stampede Trail portion of the tale, but the movie tells the whole story. You'll get the gist if you follow the link I provided about the trip he took.

    Thank you for the wonderful comments.

    Kim
Comment from strandregs
Excellent
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Thanks for the enlightning tail of the trail.
I visited ancorage in1978 and survived. Though I didnt go bear hunting or gold panning.
but I did spend two days trying to hirch hike back south.:-)) Z.

 Comment Written 06-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 06-Apr-2017
    Hi strandregs,

    Was it too cold? You wanted to leave as soon as you arrived? Even in 1978, Anchorage and Fairbanks were worlds apart... and about 360 miles, too. We have a really 'small town' feel here, even though we are the second largest city in Alaska.

    Thanks for the review.

    Kim
reply by strandregs on 06-Apr-2017
    I came up the famous alaska highway
    I was 23 and had a backpack a sleeping bag
    and a bivuack.
    my friend had only a sleeping bag.
    we slept by the river and he woke up in the
    middle of the night completley soaked from the mist.:-))