Haiku Club Challenge Multi-Author
Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Mighty Oak"A collection of haiku written by FanStory Poets
9 total reviews
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
Hi Kerry, this is just lovely I can picture the mighty oak 'bowing his head' especially with your demonstration of the picture. However, and now you are going to say, "she's always picking on me!" But this is the aggravating thing about Haiku, there are so many damn rules. Actually, for years I swore I would never write another haiku. I hated them and it wasn't until one day when the penny dropped. Now I love them.
You can't use personification for haiku - 'bows his head,' talk to Gypsy about it, she is the teacher. But I always knew that personification was a big big no-no. Tell me what she says. They all seem to use pictures now, and call them haiga. That was a no-no as well, only occasional pencil sketches in a book of Haiku would do. Because theySaid, that a haiku should stand alone, not needing a picture.I think the rules for modern English haiku may be changing.I probably need to do yet another course! Again talk to Gypsy. Tell me what she says, hugs, Giddy :))
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Hi Kerry, this is just lovely I can picture the mighty oak 'bowing his head' especially with your demonstration of the picture. However, and now you are going to say, "she's always picking on me!" But this is the aggravating thing about Haiku, there are so many damn rules. Actually, for years I swore I would never write another haiku. I hated them and it wasn't until one day when the penny dropped. Now I love them.
You can't use personification for haiku - 'bows his head,' talk to Gypsy about it, she is the teacher. But I always knew that personification was a big big no-no. Tell me what she says. They all seem to use pictures now, and call them haiga. That was a no-no as well, only occasional pencil sketches in a book of Haiku would do. Because theySaid, that a haiku should stand alone, not needing a picture.I think the rules for modern English haiku may be changing.I probably need to do yet another course! Again talk to Gypsy. Tell me what she says, hugs, Giddy :))
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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I will do Giddy, you could of PM'd me instead of the 4 star as you are a friend of mine; Quite disappointing. A Haiga has the Haiku on the picture, this is not a Haiga. It can stand alone without a picture, as it will if it goes in the book. I will definetly let you know what Gypsy says; I'm going to talk to her now. I will send my message back in a PM
: http://www.hsa-haiku.org>Haiku Association of America
snow is melting
and the village is flooded
with children
This Haiku was written by a Grand master personification is absolutley correct, as a metaphor . my tree is not a real human, as villiage didn't flood with real children.
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I feel roundly censored, Kerry, and have updated your rating. No problem, Giddy
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I do appreciate it
Comment from LateBloomer
Hello Kerry Robinson, A haiku poem vivid in imagery.
Of special note:
bows his head--
(Reverend. Basho would approve.)
Interesting artwork choice. A pleasure to read. Keep the blue waters flowing. LateBloomer
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Hello Kerry Robinson, A haiku poem vivid in imagery.
Of special note:
bows his head--
(Reverend. Basho would approve.)
Interesting artwork choice. A pleasure to read. Keep the blue waters flowing. LateBloomer
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Why thank you, my kind Sir: So happy you think Basho would approve :))) I appreciate your comments and review. Kerry
Comment from SueZen
Mighty oak indeed, in Native Indian culture trees are called "the standing people", symbolize roots/giving and have their own specific "message".
Oak teaches us strength of character and how to keep our bodies strong and healthy - to stand strong and tall in all circumstances, "weather all weathers" so to speak. Willow is the wood of love and teaches us the give-and-take or bending that is necessary for love to be fruitful. If you feel weak, stressed out, go hug an oak tree to re-energize and ground ! Lovely poem.
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Mighty oak indeed, in Native Indian culture trees are called "the standing people", symbolize roots/giving and have their own specific "message".
Oak teaches us strength of character and how to keep our bodies strong and healthy - to stand strong and tall in all circumstances, "weather all weathers" so to speak. Willow is the wood of love and teaches us the give-and-take or bending that is necessary for love to be fruitful. If you feel weak, stressed out, go hug an oak tree to re-energize and ground ! Lovely poem.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Wow, That is something interesting, thank you for the insight, i do love and believe in the energies of nature, I never heard this one, I am certainly going to try the oak tree hug to see if I can feel it. Thank you for your review.
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Thanks Kerry x For more Native Indian wisdom, teachings, etc. see book "Sacred Path Cards" by Jamie Sams - subtitle : the discovery of self through native teachings. Really worthwhile, a gift to yourself ! Love and Light, Wisdom and Insight, Susan xxx
Comment from Mustang Patty
Hi Kerry; the presentation of this well written poem is remarkable. I can imagine the might oak as he reacts to the wind blowing through his limbs. Thank you for sharing this well penned piece,
~patty~
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Hi Kerry; the presentation of this well written poem is remarkable. I can imagine the might oak as he reacts to the wind blowing through his limbs. Thank you for sharing this well penned piece,
~patty~
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much Patty for your wonderful review.
Comment from Rasmine
Kerry!! :)
This is really good. I do have one suggestion, though. Maybe the word passes could be something more forceful if its a mighty oak bowing. I'm no expert, though.
See you later. Lu said she is going to TeamSpeak today at 3 pm, I'll be there if you are interested and have the time. Tell the baby hello for me! :P
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Kerry!! :)
This is really good. I do have one suggestion, though. Maybe the word passes could be something more forceful if its a mighty oak bowing. I'm no expert, though.
See you later. Lu said she is going to TeamSpeak today at 3 pm, I'll be there if you are interested and have the time. Tell the baby hello for me! :P
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Thank you Rasmine, I actually like my Haiku the way it is, but thank you. I will try and be there at 3.
Comment from Dean Kuch
O-h-h-hhhhhhh..., I really liked this haiku about the mighty oak tree, Kerry.
It has a medieval, fantastical savoir fare about it, and the word economy you've used in the creation of this is remarkable.
Outstanding haiku!
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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O-h-h-hhhhhhh..., I really liked this haiku about the mighty oak tree, Kerry.
It has a medieval, fantastical savoir fare about it, and the word economy you've used in the creation of this is remarkable.
Outstanding haiku!
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much Dean, for your wonderful review. I do appreciate it.
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You're more than welcome, Kerry. It's always my pleasure.
~Dean :)
Comment from Sis Cat
Yes, that oak better bow his head or the wind my snap it off, as often happens. Your poem reminded me of the Aesop's Fable about the unbending mighty oak. You use personification to show the tree bowing to the wind. Your poem is vivid and creative. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Yes, that oak better bow his head or the wind my snap it off, as often happens. Your poem reminded me of the Aesop's Fable about the unbending mighty oak. You use personification to show the tree bowing to the wind. Your poem is vivid and creative. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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LOL, Thank you- I never read that fable, I will have to look it up. :))) I do appreciate your wonderful comments and review;
your humor and a lead on a read. lol. Have a great weekend
Comment from patcelaw
Kerry, this is another wonderfully picturesque haiku that you penned for the multi author book of the beloved haiku. May your weekend be blessed with wonderful things, Patricia
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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Kerry, this is another wonderfully picturesque haiku that you penned for the multi author book of the beloved haiku. May your weekend be blessed with wonderful things, Patricia
Comment Written 25-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much Patricia, I appreciate your wonderful review and comments. You my friend have a blessed weekend as well.
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Yes my friend I liked this you have done well for this book using 11 syllables the art choice works really well adds meaning to your thoughts well-done regards Jill
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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Yes my friend I liked this you have done well for this book using 11 syllables the art choice works really well adds meaning to your thoughts well-done regards Jill
Comment Written 25-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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Thank you Jill, for the great comments and review
