Humanity Project
Viewing comments for Chapter 20 "Flight From the Road"A science fiction book about genetic engineering.
29 total reviews
Comment from giraffmang
Hi Rhonda,
Another good chapter. A lot of discourse in this one and the conversations well handled.
we get to cleaner streams further north - normally farther for physical distance.
and plenty of barrel cactus - perhaps cacti here?
Nice to see some flashes of humour between the protagonists here following the jeopardy of before.
I found it funny that when Archie talks about human conditions as applied to Koko & Ayala, the same traits could also be applied to any number of animals. We're not that far removed.
and what do you know about martial arts, anyway? - need closing speech marks here.
Good levels of description with the changing landscape.
All the best
G
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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Hi Rhonda,
Another good chapter. A lot of discourse in this one and the conversations well handled.
we get to cleaner streams further north - normally farther for physical distance.
and plenty of barrel cactus - perhaps cacti here?
Nice to see some flashes of humour between the protagonists here following the jeopardy of before.
I found it funny that when Archie talks about human conditions as applied to Koko & Ayala, the same traits could also be applied to any number of animals. We're not that far removed.
and what do you know about martial arts, anyway? - need closing speech marks here.
Good levels of description with the changing landscape.
All the best
G
Comment Written 21-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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Thank you for the wonderful review, G.
Good call on all mistakes! They are fixed now.
Actually, you are right about the human and animal characteristics. That is another of my sub-themes for this book, and something the characters will discover on their own later. It has another purpose, as well, that will be revealed later in the book.
Once more, my thanks for the time and effort you take in your reviews.
Have a great rest of the week,
Rhonda
Comment from mbroyles2
Another exciting and enjoyable chapter as Archie, Koko, Ayala, and Sani prepare to distill water. I like Archie's reference to the fact it makes no difference what color your martial arts belt is and the discussions about human characteristics.
Great job!
Michael
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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Another exciting and enjoyable chapter as Archie, Koko, Ayala, and Sani prepare to distill water. I like Archie's reference to the fact it makes no difference what color your martial arts belt is and the discussions about human characteristics.
Great job!
Michael
Comment Written 21-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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Thank you, Michael! Doing a bit of in-between action work to build up to the next confrontation. Thanks for sticking with the book, and for your comments!
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from RPSaxena
Hello Rhonda,
Nice piece of Fantasy Science Fiction depicting its theme in a very interesting way!
Phraseology is impressive, and perfectly matching the theme.
Smooth, spontaneous, and captivating flow throughout from the beginning to the end.
Conversational approach is praiseworthy.
These words are particularly notable:
"The human spirit struggles to be free," Sani added. "You can effectively fence in an animal, but not a human, and it's that fact that's driving your flee for freedom."
Entertaining as well as Educative!
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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Hello Rhonda,
Nice piece of Fantasy Science Fiction depicting its theme in a very interesting way!
Phraseology is impressive, and perfectly matching the theme.
Smooth, spontaneous, and captivating flow throughout from the beginning to the end.
Conversational approach is praiseworthy.
These words are particularly notable:
"The human spirit struggles to be free," Sani added. "You can effectively fence in an animal, but not a human, and it's that fact that's driving your flee for freedom."
Entertaining as well as Educative!
Comment Written 21-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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Wow, thank you for the six star perk to my morning!!
I appreciate the positive feedback. It really helps to know if I'm heading in the direction I intend.
Thanks, as well, for the commentary on parts you like.
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from Heidi M
Great interaction between the four as they travel over rough terrain. Good to see Ayala softening a little in her attitude toward Archie and willing to listen to him as he points out human characteristics.
I hope they're covering their tracks and I like how you addressed the water situation.
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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Great interaction between the four as they travel over rough terrain. Good to see Ayala softening a little in her attitude toward Archie and willing to listen to him as he points out human characteristics.
I hope they're covering their tracks and I like how you addressed the water situation.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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Thank you, Heidi!
No, not covering their tracks, but probably should be. lol.
Thanks for the wonderful review,
Rhonda
Comment from lyenochka
It's good to see the affection developing between Archie and Ayala. It's great that they can be playful even though they are so fatigued in that sun-scorched land. Great descriptions of the environment and plant life!
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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It's good to see the affection developing between Archie and Ayala. It's great that they can be playful even though they are so fatigued in that sun-scorched land. Great descriptions of the environment and plant life!
Comment Written 21-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much. They are young, and exhaustion doesn't stop flirting. haha.
Thanks for the wonderful feedback.
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from Mike Stevens
Another fine chapter, Rhonda--I must take exception to their distaste to drinking their own urine--a couple of ice cubes, maybe some fancy cocktail mixed nuts, and you have a great evening!
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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Another fine chapter, Rhonda--I must take exception to their distaste to drinking their own urine--a couple of ice cubes, maybe some fancy cocktail mixed nuts, and you have a great evening!
Comment Written 21-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
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And there we go, Mike. Always the optimist. haha. Thanks for the review, friend!
Rhonda
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
There have been groups of people throughout time that have been treated as less than human, even experimented on in some cases. it's also to bring up any discrimination against other groups of people. It happened in the past, and is still happening today.
I wondered about this, then thought perhaps I was reading too much into it. Well written chapter, my friend~Debbie
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2017
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There have been groups of people throughout time that have been treated as less than human, even experimented on in some cases. it's also to bring up any discrimination against other groups of people. It happened in the past, and is still happening today.
I wondered about this, then thought perhaps I was reading too much into it. Well written chapter, my friend~Debbie
Comment Written 20-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2017
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Science Fiction often takes on social topics. Fantasy does, too, but I've found the Sci-fi, when written with a purpose, does more so. Thank you for looking deeper.
Rhonda
Comment from MelB
Hi Rhonda, great interaction between the characters. I'm loving this story and thank you for all the great notes. I learned even more from them.
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reply by the author on 20-Mar-2017
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Hi Rhonda, great interaction between the characters. I'm loving this story and thank you for all the great notes. I learned even more from them.
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Comment Written 20-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much!! I appreciate you taking the time to review!!
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
What a change in attitudes this trip is making in each one of the players. You keep them separate and still involve each one, very well done in the interractions
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reply by the author on 20-Mar-2017
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What a change in attitudes this trip is making in each one of the players. You keep them separate and still involve each one, very well done in the interractions
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2017
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Thank you, Barb! I'm trying very hard not to mix Ayala and Koko. They are twins, and have always been alike, but I am trying to keep them distinguishable as well. Thank you for commenting!
Rhonda
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it is working
