Haiku Club Challenge Multi-Author
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "(Haiku) Gloucester Summer"A collection of haiku written by FanStory Poets
5 total reviews
Comment from Lu Saluna
This is a lovely summer haiku. Your first two lines tie together well to form a vivid image in my mind and the satori a large fishing port. Probably really smelly too.
Great word economy! Well done.
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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This is a lovely summer haiku. Your first two lines tie together well to form a vivid image in my mind and the satori a large fishing port. Probably really smelly too.
Great word economy! Well done.
Comment Written 10-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much for your review Lu.
Comment from mountainwriter49
Good Morning, Poet,
This is an excellent example of minimal haiku, thus allowing the reader to imagine its lines and think of his/her own images of fishing boats at the shore. You've presented an observable moment in time--nothing abstract here. While fisherman work year-round, this is a good entry for the summer haiku.
a good read this morning.
Ray
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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Good Morning, Poet,
This is an excellent example of minimal haiku, thus allowing the reader to imagine its lines and think of his/her own images of fishing boats at the shore. You've presented an observable moment in time--nothing abstract here. While fisherman work year-round, this is a good entry for the summer haiku.
a good read this morning.
Ray
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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Thank you for your review, much appreciated. I do know, they work all year, but as a visitor to the shore as I, ; the shore is kind of bare and beautiful in winter's snow. In the summer it is mobbed with fishermen; cooking lobsters and fish on the docks. Boat to pot. A wonderous place.
Comment from Mustang Patty
As always, you've done a great job with this haiku. The few words tell a story and the reader gets the feeling of the fisherman's life and fishing. Thank you for sharing,
~patty~
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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As always, you've done a great job with this haiku. The few words tell a story and the reader gets the feeling of the fisherman's life and fishing. Thank you for sharing,
~patty~
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much Patty.
Comment from Badger_29
You have created a simply but wonderfully stated state of affairs. Along with the image, this wonderful haiku has a salty brine and an atmospheric feel to it. I can almost hear the gulls and smell the fish. Makes me hungry! well written, thanks for sharing.
Blessings,
Brother Badger
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2017
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You have created a simply but wonderfully stated state of affairs. Along with the image, this wonderful haiku has a salty brine and an atmospheric feel to it. I can almost hear the gulls and smell the fish. Makes me hungry! well written, thanks for sharing.
Blessings,
Brother Badger
Comment Written 07-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2017
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Thank you for your wonderful review.
Comment from rama devi
Second review
Good job! I found typos in my review notes, too! Always good to proof out stuff!
First review (FOUR stars)
Excellent word economy and imagery. Good portrait of a place in few words. Fine presentation as well., It is a true to form haiku.
However, in such a short form, a glaring spag error forces me to award a four. however, I am also happy to revise the rating if you fix it!
fisherman
drag in their lines
finsherMAN is singular.
Change to: Fishermen
Let me know!
Warmly, rd
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2017
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Second review
Good job! I found typos in my review notes, too! Always good to proof out stuff!
First review (FOUR stars)
Excellent word economy and imagery. Good portrait of a place in few words. Fine presentation as well., It is a true to form haiku.
However, in such a short form, a glaring spag error forces me to award a four. however, I am also happy to revise the rating if you fix it!
fisherman
drag in their lines
finsherMAN is singular.
Change to: Fishermen
Let me know!
Warmly, rd
Comment Written 07-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much for your review, and catching that for me. I'm changing it now. Thanks a bunch.
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Happy to help, Kerry! Upgrading now too!
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Thank you. Hey it happens to the best of us.
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Thank you. Hey it happens to the best of us.
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:-))))) yep~
