Celestial Magic
poem of the recent eclipse23 total reviews
Comment from marybell1
You kept to the number of lines and syllables for this contest. A good choice of subject, being it doesn't happen all that often.
Best oc luck.
Marybell1.
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
  |
You kept to the number of lines and syllables for this contest. A good choice of subject, being it doesn't happen all that often.
Best oc luck.
Marybell1.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
-
Thank you Marybell. I am greatfull for your review
-
You are welcome.
Marybell1.
Comment from ceramic
Concise coverage of topic using unusual language which unfortunately makes it a little disjointed and a more difficult to understand. Good graphic.
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
|
Concise coverage of topic using unusual language which unfortunately makes it a little disjointed and a more difficult to understand. Good graphic.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
-
Thank you greatly for your review, any advice is greatly appreciated. I was just told by another something similar. It must be the word ineffable. I will figure out how to maybe put a writers note with explanation. I had thought it to be a great word to explain the universe. meaning; to great for words "ineffable" :) Thank you again
Comment from robyn corum
Kerry,
I'll just be honest with you and tell you I have no idea what you're saying. I get the first line and a half. The comet eclipsed the moon...? But the rest is muddled to me. I hope others may understand better... But if you don't get many reviews, you may want to consider 'dumbing' it down a little...? Thanks ! Good luck!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
|
Kerry,
I'll just be honest with you and tell you I have no idea what you're saying. I get the first line and a half. The comet eclipsed the moon...? But the rest is muddled to me. I hope others may understand better... But if you don't get many reviews, you may want to consider 'dumbing' it down a little...? Thanks ! Good luck!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
-
Thank you for your honesty Robyn. I am brand new. I had only posted my 1st post last night. this was the 2nd. I do appreciate any advice from experienced authors. To break down Celestial Magic, you can see the traces of the comet falling through the eclipse with a magnificent beauty. "ineffable space" is something undescribable, so unbelievable there are just no words to compare to the greatness of it. hence, the infinite universe. how a incredible it is. I hope this clarified this for you. Again thank you Robyn
-
Thanks for explaining, my friend! Good luck!
