Daughter's Gone, Daughter's Gone
My daughter was involved with marriage at seventeen56 total reviews
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
I enjoyed your poem. Jay. The lines read well with a good story to tell. The rhymes are good as is the flow. I like the repeated line--it adds intensity to your meaning. Thanks for the author notes, too. Thanks for sharing. Jan
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I enjoyed your poem. Jay. The lines read well with a good story to tell. The rhymes are good as is the flow. I like the repeated line--it adds intensity to your meaning. Thanks for the author notes, too. Thanks for sharing. Jan
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello jaybird1
Your well written rhymed poem about your daughter leaving her nest at the age of seventeen made a memory read for me. (Thank You)
I was I was fifteen fell in love and at seventeen I got married and happy to say my love and I have tied the knot for sixty five year.
Gert
I read your author's note and I'm glad she is back
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Hello jaybird1
Your well written rhymed poem about your daughter leaving her nest at the age of seventeen made a memory read for me. (Thank You)
I was I was fifteen fell in love and at seventeen I got married and happy to say my love and I have tied the knot for sixty five year.
Gert
I read your author's note and I'm glad she is back
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
Comment from karenina
A happy ending! At seventeen it is so hard to TELL a teen anything. They are blessed and challenged with an innocent view of life and are quite sure their parents are way behind the times and so off they go! I've been through this myself. My daughter, too, returned in time--and I can only thank God for protecting her through her exodus.--Karenina
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A happy ending! At seventeen it is so hard to TELL a teen anything. They are blessed and challenged with an innocent view of life and are quite sure their parents are way behind the times and so off they go! I've been through this myself. My daughter, too, returned in time--and I can only thank God for protecting her through her exodus.--Karenina
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
Comment from Coco Jane
A good commentary on the maturation of our children. We raise them and then they leave the nest. I like the reversal of "schooled" and "fooled." I'm glad your daughter came back home.
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A good commentary on the maturation of our children. We raise them and then they leave the nest. I like the reversal of "schooled" and "fooled." I'm glad your daughter came back home.
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hi Jaybird, I love this poem - so well written. Good rhyme throughout and a great story in a poem. I'm glad I read your notes and your daughter is very much alive. Had I not done so I would have been sending a sympathetic message LOL. The poem is written in aabb form and the rhythm is good. I wish I had a six left. Regards Dorothy
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Hi Jaybird, I love this poem - so well written. Good rhyme throughout and a great story in a poem. I'm glad I read your notes and your daughter is very much alive. Had I not done so I would have been sending a sympathetic message LOL. The poem is written in aabb form and the rhythm is good. I wish I had a six left. Regards Dorothy
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
Comment from Heather Knight
I'm so glad this story has a happy ending.
Parents have so much love for their children that their heart can be easily broken.
Thanks for sharing another beautiful poem.
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I'm so glad this story has a happy ending.
Parents have so much love for their children that their heart can be easily broken.
Thanks for sharing another beautiful poem.
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
Comment from Scarbrems
Well, you had me fooled for a bit, there. I thought you meant she'd died. This is great work. '
'Though she left before her time,
she's in cadence with life's rhyme'
I love this idea of life having a 'rhyme' that we all fit with in one way or another. Thank you for sharing.
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Well, you had me fooled for a bit, there. I thought you meant she'd died. This is great work. '
'Though she left before her time,
she's in cadence with life's rhyme'
I love this idea of life having a 'rhyme' that we all fit with in one way or another. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
Comment from Donald O. Cassidy
I;m glad you added a foot note, saying your absent daughter is back.
At first, I was puzzled about her destiny. The sadness seemed as if she were dead.
Anyway, you achieved a mood, a deep emotion, in your poem.
As manager of a drapery shop for you, I'd say both of you are more joyful.
Don
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I;m glad you added a foot note, saying your absent daughter is back.
At first, I was puzzled about her destiny. The sadness seemed as if she were dead.
Anyway, you achieved a mood, a deep emotion, in your poem.
As manager of a drapery shop for you, I'd say both of you are more joyful.
Don
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
Comment from Iza Deleanu
I understand the grief it must cause the getting wedding at such a young age, but the reward of getting her back is higher than the previous pain. Thank you for sharing
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I understand the grief it must cause the getting wedding at such a young age, but the reward of getting her back is higher than the previous pain. Thank you for sharing
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
Comment from Susan Morritt
This is a charming poem. Having a grown daughter myself, I could identify with it. "Left our nest, in love, unschooled" paints a vivid picture of a rebellious teenager with very concerned parents. Your final stanza regarding the "glitter in my tears" displays that you still remember the despair you felt with what you believed to be your daughter's tragic mistake. Glad everything turned out well!
Susan
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This is a charming poem. Having a grown daughter myself, I could identify with it. "Left our nest, in love, unschooled" paints a vivid picture of a rebellious teenager with very concerned parents. Your final stanza regarding the "glitter in my tears" displays that you still remember the despair you felt with what you believed to be your daughter's tragic mistake. Glad everything turned out well!
Susan
Comment Written 07-Sep-2019
