Comment from nomi338

Excellent

Yikes! The very worst fate that I can imagine is to be someone's, anyone's favorite snack. The only advice that I can give to someone in your situation is, run, run like the wind, a fierce wind. Run because obviously your future may depend on how quickly you can extricate yourself from this predicament. OMG!

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 08-Jan-2017

Thanks. It would be pretty easy to outrun that beast. It's pretty fat. LOL

Comment from Sandra du Plessis

Excellent

A very well-written interesting and humorous poem about the food chain. It seens we as humans are second last in the line, there are a last in line to munch on us. Lol.

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 08-Jan-2017

Haha, yep there are lots of things that would like to chew on us! Thanks for the review.

Comment from William Ross

Excellent

hahah an ugly beast chewing on your ass, almost sounds like a boss lol.Fun and humorous piece. Good luck and have a great day

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 08-Jan-2017

Thanks. You have a great day too.

Comment from DR DIP

Excellent

haha I just don't know how to review this. The punch line has thrown me lol
"There's an ugly beast with greedy eyes
Chewing on my ass"
Is this a bit of a fetish? is being arse chewed enjoyable? lol
Is that your wife or hubby? haha

dip

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 08-Jan-2017

You mean you've never had your ass chewed? Nah, the ugly beast chewing me a new one was a royal pain in the...you know! LOL Thanks for the review.

Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose

Excellent

I never saw a Sijo before. It's a very interesting poetic form and you did an awesome job with yours. I think Aardvarks are weird. LoL

Gypsy

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 08-Jan-2017

Thanks. I'd never heard of a Sijo before today either. This little piece refused to be a tanka, so I went through the contests and found this. I think it worked.

Comment from Thal1959

Excellent

Charming and humorous, though a bit cruel to leave the audience in suspense tryin to guess exactly what "ugly beast with greedy eyes" is. I wonder how many bizarre creatures the reader's imagination is dredging up right now!

 Comment Written 08-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 08-Jan-2017

Thnks. In my mind the beast was human, tho I left that open to interpretation in the poem. A lot of readers are mentioning their bosses.

reply by Thal1959 on 08-Jan-2017

LOL - Thanks for the explanation.

Comment from tfawcus

Excellent

Well, ain't this just the ant's pants! Sounds as if you need to get your ass into gear if you are going to outrun the anal animal of your nightmares. Piles, perhaps?

 Comment Written 07-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 08-Jan-2017

Haha, in my mind the beast with greedy eyes was human, but that's open to interpretation in the poem. Piles? That might be a good nickname for a pain in the ass. Thanks for the five.

Comment from Dean Kuch

Excellent

Yeah, I used to have an ugly beast chewing on my ass all of the time too at one point in my life.
We all called her the floor supervisor.
Cute poem, and it seems to fit the form the Sijo requires.
Your rhyming is also very good.
Best of luck to you in the contest.
~Dean

 Comment Written 07-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 08-Jan-2017

Thanks. You got it. I had several people asking what the beast was. It's open to interpretation, tho I thought the greedy eyes gave it away.

reply by Dean Kuch on 08-Jan-2017

I thought it was as plain as the nose on my face.
And of you've ever seen my profile pic, then you'll know, that's pretty doggone plain, LOL.

You are more than welcome.
Best of luck! :)

Comment from Joan E.

Excellent

I was not familiar with the Sijo form and enjoyed your interpretation and bits of rhyme. Your expected conclusion was humorous. Best wishes in the contest- Joan

 Comment Written 07-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 08-Jan-2017

I'd never heard of it before today either. It refused to be a tanka, so I checked the contests and found this. It worked, at least I hope so. Thanks for a wonderful review and good wishes.

Comment from Irish Rain

Excellent

I don't believe I've ever seen a Sijo before, this is cute. I don't understand it...for instance, what is the ugly beast? BUT...I like it...sorta a chain of life poem. Blessings...

 Comment Written 07-Jan-2017

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reply by the author on 07-Jan-2017

Thanks. I've never heard of it before today either. It asked for a twist at the end, and I thought the last line fit the bill. The beast is open to interpretation.