And She Appeared
a romantic fantasy34 total reviews
Comment from Marykelly
This is a love story and the speaker describes an unexpected encounter with a woman who captured his attention and whose attention he captured in spite of declaring that he would remain a bachelor. The imagery is vivid and it is easy see her walking along the shore.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2016
  |
This is a love story and the speaker describes an unexpected encounter with a woman who captured his attention and whose attention he captured in spite of declaring that he would remain a bachelor. The imagery is vivid and it is easy see her walking along the shore.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2016
-
Thank you, Mary. I called it a "romantic fantasy!" but.you are correct. It is a love story.
Comment from fastdigits
A beautifully soft quatrain phrased
in poetic artistry of a lady in a long
white skirt with an angel's smile who
beckoned to you to walk with her a while.
Beautifully scripted.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2016
 |
A beautifully soft quatrain phrased
in poetic artistry of a lady in a long
white skirt with an angel's smile who
beckoned to you to walk with her a while.
Beautifully scripted.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2016
-
I am thrilled you like this poem so much, and appreciate the very kind praise and six bright stars.
Comment from ywedgwood
Nice little poem. I really like the line
'And as the tide did froth before' - good imagery.
However the next line ... 'her steps, she turned toward me her face'
has too many syllables and interrupts the rhythm.
"her steps, she turned 'to' me her face" is perfect.
Woody
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2016
 |
Nice little poem. I really like the line
'And as the tide did froth before' - good imagery.
However the next line ... 'her steps, she turned toward me her face'
has too many syllables and interrupts the rhythm.
"her steps, she turned 'to' me her face" is perfect.
Woody
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2016
-
I am delighted you like my poem and its imagery. But the iline you take issue with has eight syllables. "Toward" usually is pronounced as one syllable, especially in the Midwest where I live (I checked the dictionary). I do, however, like your phrasing, too.
-
Yes, I see what you mean. You can pronounce it
t'ward, in which case in my country, we would have to use poetic licence and write it as t'ward otherwise it would be two syllables. Sorry for the confusion.
Woody
Comment from janalma
Sweetly romantic. All these Romeos who think they can play the field forever, finally come up against the one who can bring them down. Lol. Enjoyed this poem. Reads well.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2016
|
Sweetly romantic. All these Romeos who think they can play the field forever, finally come up against the one who can bring them down. Lol. Enjoyed this poem. Reads well.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2016
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2016
-
I love your phrasing "sweetly romantic" and your kind praise. Thank you.
