Me Book
Viewing comments for Chapter 67 "The Flowering Edge"My Self Biograpy
4 total reviews
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
There are some really beautiful turns of phrase scattered throughout this which cause the reader to pause and ponder. Nicely done and I thank you very much for sharing it.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2016
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There are some really beautiful turns of phrase scattered throughout this which cause the reader to pause and ponder. Nicely done and I thank you very much for sharing it.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2016
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Thanks ever for ever as ever is evet...
Ricky Thanks Angel I got to come up with a name for a book.
Ricky
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
Ricky1024, great work! Much emotional pull involved and felt. I have truly come to love your style of poetry...very different and very unique. Great job. God bless and hugs, Susanne
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2016
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Ricky1024, great work! Much emotional pull involved and felt. I have truly come to love your style of poetry...very different and very unique. Great job. God bless and hugs, Susanne
Comment Written 25-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2016
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Thanks Susanne.
"For Your Eyes Only...
"ME?"
By Ricky1024
"I see
Rainbows in the Still of The Night...
"And My Broken Heart beats only in the Light...
"My TIRED BODY..
"Awakens only if My 'Jay' is okay...
"And My Dear God...
"My Shatteed Soul...
"If it would only stay...
24.
Comment from Heidi M
This writing comes straight from the heart. It is a courageous person who can pen such deeply personal grief.
My favorite line is "the warm hues and the pictures of you..." It created a vivid picture in my mind.
Suggestions for improvement:
I believe "thay" was supposed to be "that", childhood is missing the 'i',and is it supposed to be "as serpents tear holes" instead of "as serpents year holes"?
Thank you for sharing this poignant writing.
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2016
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This writing comes straight from the heart. It is a courageous person who can pen such deeply personal grief.
My favorite line is "the warm hues and the pictures of you..." It created a vivid picture in my mind.
Suggestions for improvement:
I believe "thay" was supposed to be "that", childhood is missing the 'i',and is it supposed to be "as serpents tear holes" instead of "as serpents year holes"?
Thank you for sharing this poignant writing.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2016
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Thanks for the heads up Heidi M.
My grammar is rough but my writings are enough...
Love,
Ricky
Comment from HarryT
This is an fine expression of emotion and the feeling of loss. It flows nicely from one event to the next. One can feel the torment of the soul in the words. However for me there was a visual problem, the font color is hard to read. Too dark for a black background in my opinion. The other flaws were I believe there are two misspellings:
Stanza 1: thay is there such a word? Or did you mean thy?
Stanza 3: Stormyness is a misspelling. i not y, I believe. For me the font color and the misspelling detract from the power of the poem, otherwise I would have rated it higher.
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2016
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This is an fine expression of emotion and the feeling of loss. It flows nicely from one event to the next. One can feel the torment of the soul in the words. However for me there was a visual problem, the font color is hard to read. Too dark for a black background in my opinion. The other flaws were I believe there are two misspellings:
Stanza 1: thay is there such a word? Or did you mean thy?
Stanza 3: Stormyness is a misspelling. i not y, I believe. For me the font color and the misspelling detract from the power of the poem, otherwise I would have rated it higher.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2016
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Thanks Harry Heidi have it five and also picked out flaws in grammar.
I hated that class in Third grade!
Ricky 1024.
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You are welcome. Me too re: class.
