Christine's Poems
Viewing comments for Prologue "Winter's Garden"Poems /stories on Fanstory
21 total reviews
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
This is a wonderful piece! The meter and rhyme are solid throughout making for such an enjoyable read aloud. We are getting ready for fall here and it won't be long before my garden is in wintry despair. Well done and thank you very much for sharing it.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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This is a wonderful piece! The meter and rhyme are solid throughout making for such an enjoyable read aloud. We are getting ready for fall here and it won't be long before my garden is in wintry despair. Well done and thank you very much for sharing it.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hi Monica, My day out in my garden and thinking about all the work to be done each fine day, made for this poem to be written. I am an old fashioned rhymer and I love an even syllable count, so you saying this was solid throughout made it worth while writing. I do enjoy the satisfaction of having a neat garden but it's a bit eclectic bits an pieces everywhere so always a bonus in spring. As always many thanks for reading my work and hearty Cheers to you Christine xx
Comment from Gianinas
Cheers from sunny California...Oh, we keep warm...:).
I loved your poem. I love gardening, but my garden now...suffers from...pure neglect.
I felt it while reading it, and absolutely loved the rhythm of your poem. I do not remember which one is it (by name) but I was aware of it through out the read. Thanks,
Gianina
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Cheers from sunny California...Oh, we keep warm...:).
I loved your poem. I love gardening, but my garden now...suffers from...pure neglect.
I felt it while reading it, and absolutely loved the rhythm of your poem. I do not remember which one is it (by name) but I was aware of it through out the read. Thanks,
Gianina
Comment Written 08-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hi Gianina, I am so pleased you stopped by to read my poem and at least a little bit of it shows some love LOL . Lots to do but I await some fine days. Today it is back to being cold and windy so indoors again. Your comments re the rhythm is my reward for this style I just make it up as I am going and this seemed to work for this one. I write using a syllable count and hopefully this is a 4x4x8 each line with internal rhymes,as well as end rhymes. Glad you liked it and Thanks for reading Cheers Christine😃
Comment from robyn corum
Chrissy,
You can definitely sense the gardener's heart in this poem, one who's ready to brave the elements as soon as she can to plunge her hands into the soil and start the process all over again. I loved it! I don't know what this form is called but I will have to send Joy Graham over to make sure she sees it. Just adorable and so well constructed. Great job!
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Chrissy,
You can definitely sense the gardener's heart in this poem, one who's ready to brave the elements as soon as she can to plunge her hands into the soil and start the process all over again. I loved it! I don't know what this form is called but I will have to send Joy Graham over to make sure she sees it. Just adorable and so well constructed. Great job!
Comment Written 08-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hi Robyn Oh my, I am over the moon with your lovely review and praise for my gardeners poem. I just made up this form once I wrote the first line it just flowed out, and I will be interested to see what Joy thinks. It was lovely to get out and do some gardening I have a barrow load of weeds to get rid of now. Today is back to being cold and windy so I think I will stay indoors ( good excuse to do some more writing) No painting today instead as have just renovated the kitchen and finishing up some paint work before the new floor goes down. Your six stars has started off my day so thank you my friend.
PS how is your lovely granddaughter Harper ? Cheers Christine
Comment from pharp
Wow Christine,
This was just an outstanding, amazing and most enjoyable read. The meter just perfect, excellent rhyming and very smooth flow. I mean I was all into this read. You are to be commended for a job well done. EXCEPTIONAL!!!!!!! Blessings.......Portia
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Wow Christine,
This was just an outstanding, amazing and most enjoyable read. The meter just perfect, excellent rhyming and very smooth flow. I mean I was all into this read. You are to be commended for a job well done. EXCEPTIONAL!!!!!!! Blessings.......Portia
Comment Written 08-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hi Portia, You delight me no end with your lovely praise for my work and for your lovely sixes for this one. I was pleased with it in the end and enjoyed remissing about my lovely day in the winters sun. Your exceptional rating is my reward for a hard day work. Much appreciation and fondness to you Cheers Christine x😃😃
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Great poem about the joy of gardening. Every year I plant tomatoes. I buy seedlings from a reputable gardener, I plant them deep, they way they say you should, I water and fertilize them and every years I am rewarded with brown dead stalks.
Perhaps if I read your poetry to them they would grow. I'll try it and get back to you.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Great poem about the joy of gardening. Every year I plant tomatoes. I buy seedlings from a reputable gardener, I plant them deep, they way they say you should, I water and fertilize them and every years I am rewarded with brown dead stalks.
Perhaps if I read your poetry to them they would grow. I'll try it and get back to you.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hi Thomas, Sounds a bit like our tomatoes, not often a great success, but every year my husband plant them. he has his vege garden and I do the rest. So please read my poem to them and hopefully they will flourish LOL. Many thanks for your time to read and send a review it is much appreciated. Have a great day Cheers Christine😃
Comment from RoostyNester
I'm jealous just knowing that the weather is cool. It is hot, hot, hot here. I loved your cute little garden poem. I could almost feel the plants start to bud. Well written in word and style. Very good. I'll take some of the okra when it's ready. lol
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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I'm jealous just knowing that the weather is cool. It is hot, hot, hot here. I loved your cute little garden poem. I could almost feel the plants start to bud. Well written in word and style. Very good. I'll take some of the okra when it's ready. lol
Comment Written 08-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hi RoostyNestor. Thanks for reading my poem and please send some hot weather over here I am not a fan of the cold, and look forward to spring and summer each year, our climate is very temporate and it is quite cool at times so gardens suffer in the winter. Yes some buds are ppeking through all ready just need to clear the weeds to let them see the light. Cheers to you for a good day . a swim sounds like a good idea. Christine😃
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You may have ALL the summer weather here. We only get a few months of nice weather...the rest is scorching hot! Most of the year is HOT weather. It never gets too cold for me. I love the winter...of course our winters are so light, it probable would be more like fall weather than winter. haha God Bless and have a good day!
Comment from Bollie
This is a perfect poem Chrissy. I love poetic stories and that's exactly what this is. The imagery that you created with your words brings this poem alive. The rhyming is great and unforced. The syllable count is really consistent throughout which makes the poem flow effortlessly. I can't think of anything that could be changed. This is a really great poem, keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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This is a perfect poem Chrissy. I love poetic stories and that's exactly what this is. The imagery that you created with your words brings this poem alive. The rhyming is great and unforced. The syllable count is really consistent throughout which makes the poem flow effortlessly. I can't think of anything that could be changed. This is a really great poem, keep up the good work.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hi Bollie. Wow I am very happy with your great review and wonderful six stars for this poem of mine as a result of a day in my garden. I am so pleased you felt this was unforced and I am a bit of a stickler for syllables as i like an even flow so you comments are very much appreciated and makes it worthwhile to put my thoughts down. I love writing and sometimes a little inspiration like today gets me going. Many Cheers to you for your time Christine 😃😃
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You're very welcome Christine. It truly is my pleasure. You're a great writer. Have a wonderful night.
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You're very welcome Christine. It truly is my pleasure. You're a great writer. Have a wonderful night.
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You're very welcome Christine. It truly is my pleasure. You're a great writer. Have a wonderful night.
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Thank you so much
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thank you so much Bollie more to come
Comment from Domino 2
Minor nit-pick in title, Christine - should be the possessive, 'Winter's Garden'.
Typo in 8th line - should be, 'surely'.
Bonus of excellent internal rhymes.
I found quite a few lines that didn't scan for meter and therefore offered a 'choppy' read to me.
However, for example, this stanza is perfectly metered:
'From winters blues we'll see the hues so pleasing to the eye,
the blossum sprig and wattle's twig lets perfume waft on by.
I'll breathe it in you'll see me grin I'll give a little skip,
My heart will sing when it is spring and winter loses grip.
Typo in 2nd line - should be, 'blossom'.
Very nicely expressed.
Cheers, Ray xx
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Minor nit-pick in title, Christine - should be the possessive, 'Winter's Garden'.
Typo in 8th line - should be, 'surely'.
Bonus of excellent internal rhymes.
I found quite a few lines that didn't scan for meter and therefore offered a 'choppy' read to me.
However, for example, this stanza is perfectly metered:
'From winters blues we'll see the hues so pleasing to the eye,
the blossum sprig and wattle's twig lets perfume waft on by.
I'll breathe it in you'll see me grin I'll give a little skip,
My heart will sing when it is spring and winter loses grip.
Typo in 2nd line - should be, 'blossom'.
Very nicely expressed.
Cheers, Ray xx
Comment Written 08-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hi Ray, Many Thanks for reading and sending me your feedback and I appreciate your advice and have corrected the typo's. No excuse but it is 1am here in Australia and I am still up Brain a bit tired LOL. Many Cheers for your positive review Cheers Christine
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No probs, Christine, and thanks for your gracious reply. Cheers, Ray xx
Comment from I am Cat
Hello Christine,
Wow! I wish it was winter here! 100+ degrees (fahrenheit) daily for weeks now) :(
lol
Things are dying here too, but from lack of rain.
Your poem is lovely! I DO think it could use some punctuation, but that would take it on every single line, and since you've left it out, I'm not sure you WANT to use it, or you weren't sure WHERE to use it... but on every line, you have clauses inside the lines, such as:
This winter's day(,) I write to say(,) was time to go outside,
(It's like a pause in the middle of the line, which should be surrounded by commas, but that's a lot of commas, so.... it's your call. I can help you with that, but like I say... I wasn't sure whether you left them out intentionally. So you can let me know, before I go around assuming you did. lol
That being said, I loved it!
I have made a few notes, as there were some typos, but all in all, a beautiful poem! It's great to read you!
Cat
the start of spring will sur(e)l[e]y bring some brand new planted seeds. (surely)
the bloss(o)m sprig and wattle's twig lets perfume waft on by. (should be blossom (unless this is some plant I'm not aware of? or you spell it differently there?)
Upon this earth(,) then see rebirth(,) that come(s) with season(')s change.
So those are my thoughts.
I've enjoyed reading and reviewing your work. I do hope you are well!
Love and laughter,
cat
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hello Christine,
Wow! I wish it was winter here! 100+ degrees (fahrenheit) daily for weeks now) :(
lol
Things are dying here too, but from lack of rain.
Your poem is lovely! I DO think it could use some punctuation, but that would take it on every single line, and since you've left it out, I'm not sure you WANT to use it, or you weren't sure WHERE to use it... but on every line, you have clauses inside the lines, such as:
This winter's day(,) I write to say(,) was time to go outside,
(It's like a pause in the middle of the line, which should be surrounded by commas, but that's a lot of commas, so.... it's your call. I can help you with that, but like I say... I wasn't sure whether you left them out intentionally. So you can let me know, before I go around assuming you did. lol
That being said, I loved it!
I have made a few notes, as there were some typos, but all in all, a beautiful poem! It's great to read you!
Cat
the start of spring will sur(e)l[e]y bring some brand new planted seeds. (surely)
the bloss(o)m sprig and wattle's twig lets perfume waft on by. (should be blossom (unless this is some plant I'm not aware of? or you spell it differently there?)
Upon this earth(,) then see rebirth(,) that come(s) with season(')s change.
So those are my thoughts.
I've enjoyed reading and reviewing your work. I do hope you are well!
Love and laughter,
cat
Comment Written 08-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hi Cat Thanks for reading and reviewing my poem and for confirming what ai should have done in the first place do the comma,s I had them in originally and then changed it so ai will go back and change it. I should have stuck to my original thoughts and thanks for the spelling pick ups too will fix up ASAP. Great to hear from you and wish you a bright sunny day but not to hot. I love the summer and can't wait but spring will be nice as we have had a cold wet winter and I am over mud. Cheers dear friend Christine
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lol, you're very welcome my dear...
oh mud. I don't like mud at all either.
We called that "break up" in Alaska... when all the ice started melting. Not a pretty time at all. Hugs and love
Cat
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Hugs back corrections made I hope xxx ( it is 1am and I am still up time for bed brain drain now LOL)
Comment from robina1978
I don't think I ever read a poem by you. This one tells about how you neglected your garden in the winter as it was too cold. Now on the first warmer day you start catching up.The drawing complements your poem very well.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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I don't think I ever read a poem by you. This one tells about how you neglected your garden in the winter as it was too cold. Now on the first warmer day you start catching up.The drawing complements your poem very well.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2016
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Hi robina1978. Thank you very much for reading my poem and for your review I appreciate this and yes it was a catch up in my garden much more to do But getting there Cheers for a lovely day Christine😃
