Astatula (Final Edition)
Viewing comments for Chapter 56 "Little Green Army Men"A young boy tries to turn his life around.Can he?
15 total reviews
Comment from Sankey
A great sadistic horrible read. Well done. I don't know where everyone else is atm. Thanks anyway very vivid pictures being drawn in all our minds by your pen. Just one little spag. He was only get(ting) warmed up!
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2016
A great sadistic horrible read. Well done. I don't know where everyone else is atm. Thanks anyway very vivid pictures being drawn in all our minds by your pen. Just one little spag. He was only get(ting) warmed up!
Comment Written 19-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2016
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Thanks for the catch.
Shows I need to pay more attention to my editing some times.
Your comments and support appreciated.
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Again excellently written with no problems noted.
Cant wait to fill in the blanks with the rest of the story.
this is only going to fuel Brock's rage against him but make him more vulnerable
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2016
Again excellently written with no problems noted.
Cant wait to fill in the blanks with the rest of the story.
this is only going to fuel Brock's rage against him but make him more vulnerable
Comment Written 19-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this portion of the story.
Not sure I would want to be in Bee-Bo's place right about now!
Your comments and support appreciated.
Comment from mfowler
I think you really are making this Bee-Bo character into one,
deeply disturbed psychopath. You must almost be living in his
head by now. This systematic deconstruction of his old buddy,
Sheriff Daniels's private world, shows how cruel and egocentric
his emotions are. Right down to the cutting up of the kid's green
army. No better way to destroy a child. I thought the prose read
well, the emotion was centred and focussed directly on the
clown's twisted logic, and your conclusion was perfect. It really
creates a great segue to the next chapter. Well done.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2016
I think you really are making this Bee-Bo character into one,
deeply disturbed psychopath. You must almost be living in his
head by now. This systematic deconstruction of his old buddy,
Sheriff Daniels's private world, shows how cruel and egocentric
his emotions are. Right down to the cutting up of the kid's green
army. No better way to destroy a child. I thought the prose read
well, the emotion was centred and focussed directly on the
clown's twisted logic, and your conclusion was perfect. It really
creates a great segue to the next chapter. Well done.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2016
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Bee-Bo's picture has been painted.
Not sure I would want to be in his place right about now though when the Sheriff arrives back home.
Your comments and support appreciated.
Comment from misscookie
This is getting worst I can imagine what is going to happen next.
Bee-bee is a very sick man.
I hope he is found sound.
Oops If this happens the story is over.
I got to think about this.
Cookie
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reply by the author on 20-Jul-2016
This is getting worst I can imagine what is going to happen next.
Bee-bee is a very sick man.
I hope he is found sound.
Oops If this happens the story is over.
I got to think about this.
Cookie
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this misscookie.
Always appreciate your comments and support.
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You're very welcome.
Take care.
Cookie
Comment from Hayley Solomon
Quite a horrible read, but that was your intention, so well written!
I don't think I like Bee-Bo very much and I feel for Cody.
Good editing, smooth read, very fluid with tension building.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2016
Quite a horrible read, but that was your intention, so well written!
I don't think I like Bee-Bo very much and I feel for Cody.
Good editing, smooth read, very fluid with tension building.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this portion of the story.
So much more to come. So stay tuned.
Your comments and support appreciated.