Note in a Pot
We are all clay vessels.80 total reviews
Comment from nancyrabbrose
You have written a wonderful poem about sending love to a loved one. The information you included was very helpful. What a great dad you had. I know he is delighted with your poem, your tribute to him.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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You have written a wonderful poem about sending love to a loved one. The information you included was very helpful. What a great dad you had. I know he is delighted with your poem, your tribute to him.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Yes, Nancy, my father would have been delighted in m poem to him. He was also a poet. Thank you for your review and wishing me success in the contest.
Comment from Pantygynt
This is an excellent piece of free verse incorporating som fascinating folk lore from the pottery trade.
These three line caught my imagination,
"Perhaps hope trembles like a butterfly
on the bottom of Pandora's Box
after the world's evils escaped."
A splendid simile and a beautiful image.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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This is an excellent piece of free verse incorporating som fascinating folk lore from the pottery trade.
These three line caught my imagination,
"Perhaps hope trembles like a butterfly
on the bottom of Pandora's Box
after the world's evils escaped."
A splendid simile and a beautiful image.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Yes, Pantygynt, someone else also pointed out those three lines as her favorite. They are so visual. With my poem, I tried to paint detail visually so that the reader can imagine them. I am glad you found my free verse excellent. Thanks for your review.
Comment from GWHARGIS
You got me with the butterfly trembling at the bottom of Pandora's box. Great imagery. The emotional tug of releasing the father's ashes was humbling. I loved this. Beautifully executed and filled with exquisite details. Well done. Good luck in the contest. Gretchen
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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You got me with the butterfly trembling at the bottom of Pandora's box. Great imagery. The emotional tug of releasing the father's ashes was humbling. I loved this. Beautifully executed and filled with exquisite details. Well done. Good luck in the contest. Gretchen
Comment Written 03-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Oh, thank you, GWHARGIS, for your generous, six star review. I love the detail of Hope as a butterfly trembling on the bottom of Pandora's Box. Thank you also for wishing me success in the contest. I appreciate it.
Comment from LisaD123
This is an eloquent and deeply,owing poem. The interpretation of the writing prompt is very original and the images created are very enjoyable. The reader is able to empathise with the emotions portrayed and the use of direct speech in the last stanza makes the situation feel more poignant and adds to the realism. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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This is an eloquent and deeply,owing poem. The interpretation of the writing prompt is very original and the images created are very enjoyable. The reader is able to empathise with the emotions portrayed and the use of direct speech in the last stanza makes the situation feel more poignant and adds to the realism. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Yes, LisaD123, this is a curious, beautiful poem because I incorporated both my thoughts when I was scattering my father's ashes and my father's note to me. I am glad we worked together on this poem. He would be proud. Thank you for your review.
Comment from robina1978
Good photo of a beautiful clay pot that complements your poem perfectly. When your father died you were asked by him to put his ashes in this pot, and you sprayed them on desert ground. It also had a note in it for you. Your father knew of this habit.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Good photo of a beautiful clay pot that complements your poem perfectly. When your father died you were asked by him to put his ashes in this pot, and you sprayed them on desert ground. It also had a note in it for you. Your father knew of this habit.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Thank you, robina1978, for your fine review. I am glad I shared my father's pot and note with you.
Comment from Eternal Muse
This is so very beautiful and moving.
Once, my Dad gave me this note in a pot:
"It is said in the Orient
the small note in a clay pot
will always keep the love
that is sent to you."
What a great tradition.
Love your imagery and the uniqueness of the whole piece. Reminded me of my mom who has been gone for nine and a half years, and I miss her every day.
Great image to go with the poem.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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This is so very beautiful and moving.
Once, my Dad gave me this note in a pot:
"It is said in the Orient
the small note in a clay pot
will always keep the love
that is sent to you."
What a great tradition.
Love your imagery and the uniqueness of the whole piece. Reminded me of my mom who has been gone for nine and a half years, and I miss her every day.
Great image to go with the poem.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Yes, yeltel, I wrote the poem first and decided to photograph the actual pot and note my father gave me. Whenever I miss my father, I read his note. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Dammit! It seems those FanStory Gremlins have struck yet again in your author's notes I see, Anonymous Poet. That generally occurs when you go to a website like Wikipedia, for example, copy their information, then paste it unedited in your author's notes.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. From the Earth we were created, and to the Earth we will one day return.
It's all a part of the beautiful, ongoing, never-ending cyclic function of life.
I've never hear of the Asian custom you mentioned in your lovely piece either, Anonymous, but I did find it to be an interesting premise.
Best of luck to you in the contest.
~Dean
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Dammit! It seems those FanStory Gremlins have struck yet again in your author's notes I see, Anonymous Poet. That generally occurs when you go to a website like Wikipedia, for example, copy their information, then paste it unedited in your author's notes.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. From the Earth we were created, and to the Earth we will one day return.
It's all a part of the beautiful, ongoing, never-ending cyclic function of life.
I've never hear of the Asian custom you mentioned in your lovely piece either, Anonymous, but I did find it to be an interesting premise.
Best of luck to you in the contest.
~Dean
Comment Written 03-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Thank you, Dean, for your enthusiastic and heartfelt review. There is so much my father knew as a potter which I do not know. I am glad I have this pot and note from him. Thank you for your review.
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Sure, my pleasure.
~Dean
Comment from jaybird1
A deep, insightful and extremely well thought out bit of wisdom.The philosophy of
this probing write makes much sense-exceptional
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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A deep, insightful and extremely well thought out bit of wisdom.The philosophy of
this probing write makes much sense-exceptional
Comment Written 03-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Thank you, jaybird1, for your generous, six star review of my "deep, insightful and extremely well thought out bit of wisdom."
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem on clay vessels. It make sense if we think about it, God is the potter and we are the clay, and we are known as vessels carrying our souls.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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A very well-written poem on clay vessels. It make sense if we think about it, God is the potter and we are the clay, and we are known as vessels carrying our souls.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Yes, Sandra, God is the Master Potter and we are the vessels. Thank you for your review.
Comment from fionageorge
What a wonderful poem about a Clay Vessel, interesting author notes too, thank you. I enjoyed the read, and having scattered a close friends ashes recently, near his home where he lives when he first arrived in Australia, at his request, I could so relate to this.
One small observation/question:
jinni - it this how it is meant to be spelled? I always thought it was a genie. I googled jinni, but couldn't find it (except for a business name).
Good luck in the contest and warmest regards, Marijke :o)
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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What a wonderful poem about a Clay Vessel, interesting author notes too, thank you. I enjoyed the read, and having scattered a close friends ashes recently, near his home where he lives when he first arrived in Australia, at his request, I could so relate to this.
One small observation/question:
jinni - it this how it is meant to be spelled? I always thought it was a genie. I googled jinni, but couldn't find it (except for a business name).
Good luck in the contest and warmest regards, Marijke :o)
Comment Written 03-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
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Yes, Marijke, I used the Arabic spelling in the singular of jinni. The Anglicized version is genie. Here is a Wikipedia article on it, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jinn
Thank you for your review and wishing me success in the contest. I am glad you can relate to my poem.
