Astatula (Final Edition)
Viewing comments for Chapter 42 "Bee-Bo"A young boy tries to turn his life around.Can he?
16 total reviews
Comment from Lynn27
Okay. I'm little confused here. I feelike there's two scenes with each character in a scene. The villain in the first scene. If this is correct then the opening line needs works.
There's needs a signal to the reader that scene belongs to Brock.
To me Brock's scene you just nailed it.
Also your villain is scary and creepy! You nailed that too.
Lynn
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reply by the author on 04-Jul-2016
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Okay. I'm little confused here. I feelike there's two scenes with each character in a scene. The villain in the first scene. If this is correct then the opening line needs works.
There's needs a signal to the reader that scene belongs to Brock.
To me Brock's scene you just nailed it.
Also your villain is scary and creepy! You nailed that too.
Lynn
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2016
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Okay.
Comment from dmt1967
This story fooled me. I didn't realise it was part of a book. I enjoyed reading it but thought it might be about a child and a toy lol. It was very well-written but a bit repetitive. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2016
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This story fooled me. I didn't realise it was part of a book. I enjoyed reading it but thought it might be about a child and a toy lol. It was very well-written but a bit repetitive. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this portion of the story.
Comment from create4christ
Interesting continuation of Astatula. How did Cody get hurt and fall into a coma? I hope BeeBo doesn't hurt Cody worse. Always a great story teller.
ANXIOUSLY WAITING!
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
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Interesting continuation of Astatula. How did Cody get hurt and fall into a coma? I hope BeeBo doesn't hurt Cody worse. Always a great story teller.
ANXIOUSLY WAITING!
Comment Written 19-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
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This is not a continuation of Astatula. It is the fourth chapter of my follow-up book to that Series known as Missing. Where have you been lately?
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I guess I missed the first two chapters. I'm a fan now, though, so I won't miss anymore. :-)
Comment from Zue65
Wow, your story is heating up fast with wild frenzy from the past enemy of Daniels in the person of a killing maniac Bee-Boo. I will definitely wait for the next post to find out what will happen next.
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2016
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Wow, your story is heating up fast with wild frenzy from the past enemy of Daniels in the person of a killing maniac Bee-Boo. I will definitely wait for the next post to find out what will happen next.
Comment Written 19-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this portion of this story. Stay tuned. Much more to come.
Comment from lancellot
So, this is written from Daniels' perspective. How does he know what BEE-Bo the clown was thinking or felt?
Bee-Bo could not remember if the number of special deliveries he made over the years was in the twenties? Maybe even the thirties! There were so many he lost count somewhere along the way. Very quickly Bee-Bo learned how fruitful the market produced. Those he could not sell became ground meat.
- how does Daniels know this?
If Daniels is watching and listening to Bee-bo, where is he exactly?
This seems to be part of a larger tale, perhaps a chapter. To give it a fair review I would need more information.
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2016
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So, this is written from Daniels' perspective. How does he know what BEE-Bo the clown was thinking or felt?
Bee-Bo could not remember if the number of special deliveries he made over the years was in the twenties? Maybe even the thirties! There were so many he lost count somewhere along the way. Very quickly Bee-Bo learned how fruitful the market produced. Those he could not sell became ground meat.
- how does Daniels know this?
If Daniels is watching and listening to Bee-bo, where is he exactly?
This seems to be part of a larger tale, perhaps a chapter. To give it a fair review I would need more information.
Comment Written 19-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2016
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The information can be found in my book Missing. Glad you enjoyed this.
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
I got confused with the back and forth from what BeeBo was thinking and his reasoning then to Daniels and his thoughts.
Had to read couple of times to get the difference.
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2016
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I got confused with the back and forth from what BeeBo was thinking and his reasoning then to Daniels and his thoughts.
Had to read couple of times to get the difference.
Comment Written 19-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this. Much more to come so stay tuned.
Comment from Jim Lorson Sr
Brett, this chapter is so very intense with this Bee-Bo character. A great addition to your book.
The deviant thought this character was talking about out loud really adds the intense drama that will surely happen.
I really like your main character other then Cody, in Brock Daniels. Smart with street sense and cop sense. I am glad you invited me to follow the chapters , the storylines about these people involved with this book.
Enjoy this truly great day dedicated to all the father's of this world,,,,,Jim
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2016
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Brett, this chapter is so very intense with this Bee-Bo character. A great addition to your book.
The deviant thought this character was talking about out loud really adds the intense drama that will surely happen.
I really like your main character other then Cody, in Brock Daniels. Smart with street sense and cop sense. I am glad you invited me to follow the chapters , the storylines about these people involved with this book.
Enjoy this truly great day dedicated to all the father's of this world,,,,,Jim
Comment Written 19-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this portion of the story. Much more to come so stay tuned. Your comments and support appreciated.
Comment from MizKat
Hi Brett,
This is another interesting chapter to your story. You sure are good at writing them. I'm glad that Brock found out that Bee-Bo was sneaking into Cody's room so he'd be looking out for Cody and ready to shoot Bee-Bo if he kept going into Cody's room.
Kat
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
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Hi Brett,
This is another interesting chapter to your story. You sure are good at writing them. I'm glad that Brock found out that Bee-Bo was sneaking into Cody's room so he'd be looking out for Cody and ready to shoot Bee-Bo if he kept going into Cody's room.
Kat
Comment Written 19-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this portion of the story.
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I did and will look forward to reading more. Kat
Comment from nancy_e_davis
I don't think I am going to like Bee-Bo the Clown. I don't especially like clowns anyway. They look spooky to me and always have. He has come back to torment Brock and take Cody away. I don't think so. Well done. Nancy
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
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I don't think I am going to like Bee-Bo the Clown. I don't especially like clowns anyway. They look spooky to me and always have. He has come back to torment Brock and take Cody away. I don't think so. Well done. Nancy
Comment Written 19-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this portion of the story. Much more to come so stay tuned.
Comment from Abby Wilson-hand
wow that is a lot of detail and what a horrible person it's not my kind of rad but I red it anyways. very detailed and a very great write
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
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wow that is a lot of detail and what a horrible person it's not my kind of rad but I red it anyways. very detailed and a very great write
Comment Written 19-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
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Glad you enjoyed this chapter.
