A Profound Influence - Janie LaBran
The power of one, a story of profound influence19 total reviews
Comment from Dawn Munro
I am trying to ignore content in order to review your essay as we are supposed to write reviews - on the actual writing, and NOT on content. But we are allowed to comment on content, just not rate it, so I have to address this amazing essay for its story first.
I am sure God puts certain people in our path for a reason; I am blessed to have 'met' you, and honored to be able to read your work.
Okay, now I can pick on you. (LOL)
My suggestions for editing:
1) para 4- "...over the past fifty-five years(.)" - please end it here and begin a new sentence. (Yes, I know it will be a shorter sentence - LOL. Varying the length of sentences keeps the piece interesting. Besides, run-ons are not only confusing, they're exhausting.)
HA! Fooled ya. Only one suggestion. Great writing and a truly inspiring story - God bless you.
reply by the author on 25-May-2016
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I am trying to ignore content in order to review your essay as we are supposed to write reviews - on the actual writing, and NOT on content. But we are allowed to comment on content, just not rate it, so I have to address this amazing essay for its story first.
I am sure God puts certain people in our path for a reason; I am blessed to have 'met' you, and honored to be able to read your work.
Okay, now I can pick on you. (LOL)
My suggestions for editing:
1) para 4- "...over the past fifty-five years(.)" - please end it here and begin a new sentence. (Yes, I know it will be a shorter sentence - LOL. Varying the length of sentences keeps the piece interesting. Besides, run-ons are not only confusing, they're exhausting.)
HA! Fooled ya. Only one suggestion. Great writing and a truly inspiring story - God bless you.
Comment Written 24-May-2016
reply by the author on 25-May-2016
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Dawn, you are the best! Why did I think you had already reviewed this? I love you edit suggestion and have already made the change. You are that highly regaled by m'wa!
I appreciate your 'path' observation, and couldn't agree more...there are no coincidences.
XO.
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Maybe 'cuz I thought so too...? But the reviewing box (where my review should have shown if I had) was empty, so...(LOL)
You're most welcome. (And no I'm not - you are. :))
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We'll blame it on the second-hand smoke in your apartment...smoking mirror reviews!! 😥😷
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LOL - I am trying to organize a little so putting that mess in one place - a book - but I can't remember titles and can't find half the stuff I wrote! Hahahaha. Oh dear...smokey brain, never mind smoke and mirrors...(the jerk)!
Comment from Gone but not forgotten
Wow. What a wonderful essay describing the need for acceptance and support of all people in our world. And you must be incredibly proud of your children - and take full credit for the good work you've done, too. One tiny note...you may want to respell importance in this sentence: "It was Janie who unwittingly taught me the importantance in a human connection in fostering empathy" Thank you for the work you do and for bringing up other humans who feel the same way. As for Janie...YOU GO GIRL!!
reply by the author on 24-May-2016
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Wow. What a wonderful essay describing the need for acceptance and support of all people in our world. And you must be incredibly proud of your children - and take full credit for the good work you've done, too. One tiny note...you may want to respell importance in this sentence: "It was Janie who unwittingly taught me the importantance in a human connection in fostering empathy" Thank you for the work you do and for bringing up other humans who feel the same way. As for Janie...YOU GO GIRL!!
Comment Written 24-May-2016
reply by the author on 24-May-2016
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Wow, a six!! Thank you for your thoughtful RR&R, and for the 'catch' which has been corrected :) My editing skills are slipping! Have an awesome evening.
Comment from DonandVicki
I did enjoy reading this true story, you know how to keep the writing fresh and keep the reader wanting to come back for more. Well done.
reply by the author on 24-May-2016
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I did enjoy reading this true story, you know how to keep the writing fresh and keep the reader wanting to come back for more. Well done.
Comment Written 24-May-2016
reply by the author on 24-May-2016
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Thank you, Don, for your lovely review and rating. I very much aporeciated your continued interest!
Comment from MirandaDJ
Wow, this is really a hartwarming, touching story. It is amazing that people with so much harship are often so courageous and joyful. I found this piece interesting, inspiring and very well written.
reply by the author on 21-May-2016
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Wow, this is really a hartwarming, touching story. It is amazing that people with so much harship are often so courageous and joyful. I found this piece interesting, inspiring and very well written.
Comment Written 21-May-2016
reply by the author on 21-May-2016
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Thank you so very much, Miranda, for the beautiful 6, and for your lovely review. I plan on sharing these with Janie the next time I see her, and I know she wiil appreciate your words as well. Have a wonderful weekend!
Comment from mfowler
When you look at the achievements of Stephen Hawking with his
severe disabilities, it's easy to see how disabled people can confound
and inspire able bodied ones. But, there's no greater example than the people we meet and grow with. Jan clearly has a profound effect on
you personally and also on your family. You describe the special
Olympics coming soon, and your passion and pride in the achievements
of all involved are palpable in this essay. It's wonderful that you can eulogize Jan in this way, in turn inspiring those who hear the story.
reply by the author on 21-May-2016
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When you look at the achievements of Stephen Hawking with his
severe disabilities, it's easy to see how disabled people can confound
and inspire able bodied ones. But, there's no greater example than the people we meet and grow with. Jan clearly has a profound effect on
you personally and also on your family. You describe the special
Olympics coming soon, and your passion and pride in the achievements
of all involved are palpable in this essay. It's wonderful that you can eulogize Jan in this way, in turn inspiring those who hear the story.
Comment Written 21-May-2016
reply by the author on 21-May-2016
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Thank you so very much for your RR&R6, and for your lovely review. I plan on sharing these with Janie the next time I see her, and I know she wiil appreciate your words as well. Have a wonderful weekend!
Comment from Judy Couch
This story is escellent. Unfortunately, I'm out of sixes. It sounds like you're really proud of your son and for good reason. One question: How does Janie communicate with you since she is non-verbal?
reply by the author on 11-May-2016
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This story is escellent. Unfortunately, I'm out of sixes. It sounds like you're really proud of your son and for good reason. One question: How does Janie communicate with you since she is non-verbal?
Comment Written 11-May-2016
reply by the author on 11-May-2016
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Judy, she uses eye contact on a clear board that clusters letters of the alphabet and uses her eyes to dart around the board as you put the sentences together. You can see the board pictured in the article I attached from the newspaper article referencing her business card venture. Over the years, technology has improved her ability to communicate via a computer. By attaching a metal disk to her forehead, Janie uses the magnet to engage letters and make sentences and word documents. The process is long and arduous but has given her the freedom to write letters and communicate beyond the board. Thank you, Judy, for your RR&R and virtual six :) Just as good as a five for me.
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
This is an excellent write, Mary, that makes the reader realize how lucky they are to not be physically challenged. We tend to take it all for granted.
Your Janie LaBran sounds like an amazingly wonderful woman. You can bet that if she touched your life and that of your family in such a profound way, that she left quite an impact on many others as well.
Thank god for people like your son and others who make it their career to help intellectually and physically challenged people. What would we do without them!
Connie
reply by the author on 08-May-2016
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This is an excellent write, Mary, that makes the reader realize how lucky they are to not be physically challenged. We tend to take it all for granted.
Your Janie LaBran sounds like an amazingly wonderful woman. You can bet that if she touched your life and that of your family in such a profound way, that she left quite an impact on many others as well.
Thank god for people like your son and others who make it their career to help intellectually and physically challenged people. What would we do without them!
Connie
Comment Written 08-May-2016
reply by the author on 08-May-2016
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Thank you, Connie, once again for your RR&R and continued follow. I appreciate you. Janie is quite the gal, and lost her mama, two years come November and the young age of 93. Hazel had eight daughters and even in the fog of dementia, would always ask where Janie was and what she was doing. The other seven, not so much! I think Janie kept her from leaving, in a way. Thank you, and have a Happy Mother's Day! XO
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Thank you, Connie, once again for your RR&R and continued follow. I appreciate you. Janie is quite the gal, and lost her mama, two years come November and the young age of 93. Hazel had eight daughters and even in the fog of dementia, would always ask where Janie was and what she was doing. The other seven, not so much! I think Janie kept her from leaving, in a way. Thank you, and have a Happy Mother's Day! XO
Comment from C.J. 16
Excellent work on your well-written article and your author's notes Mary. I enjoyed reading both tremendously. Thanks for sharing.
Happy Mother's Day. Hope you have a wonderful day.
Linda
reply by the author on 08-May-2016
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Excellent work on your well-written article and your author's notes Mary. I enjoyed reading both tremendously. Thanks for sharing.
Happy Mother's Day. Hope you have a wonderful day.
Linda
Comment Written 08-May-2016
reply by the author on 08-May-2016
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Thank you so very much, Linda. I appreciate your RR&R. I appreciate you. Happy Mother's Day!
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Thank you so very much, Linda. I appreciate your RR&R. I appreciate you. Happy Mother's Day!
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You're very welcome Mary. I appreciate you as well.
Linda
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You're very welcome Mary. I appreciate you as well.
Linda
Comment from Scarbrems
A fantastic piece on a great organisation. Janie is clearly a massively positive force in the life of you and your family. I'm glad you shared this thoughtful and interesting piece.
reply by the author on 08-May-2016
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A fantastic piece on a great organisation. Janie is clearly a massively positive force in the life of you and your family. I'm glad you shared this thoughtful and interesting piece.
Comment Written 08-May-2016
reply by the author on 08-May-2016
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Thank you very much, Sarkems, for your RR&R. Janie lost her mom two years come November. Hazel the mother of eight and in the haze of dementia, always wanted to know where Janie was in the house and what she was doing...the other seven girls, not so much! I think Janie was the force that kept her with us for 93 years.
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Thank you very much, Sarkems, for your RR&R. Janie lost her mom two years come November. Hazel the mother of eight and in the haze of dementia, always wanted to know where Janie was in the house and what she was doing...the other seven girls, not so much! I think Janie was the force that kept her with us for 93 years.
Comment from Marvin Calloway
The feeling and compassion you inject into this painful yet heartwarming story is rewarding to the reader. The story also makes a "normal" person feel ashamed for not trying to do more for others.
No typos.
Marv
reply by the author on 08-May-2016
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The feeling and compassion you inject into this painful yet heartwarming story is rewarding to the reader. The story also makes a "normal" person feel ashamed for not trying to do more for others.
No typos.
Marv
Comment Written 07-May-2016
reply by the author on 08-May-2016
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Hi Marv, thank you so much for type RR&Rand the generous six! I appreciate your comments very much, and had no intent to make anyone feel badly, just a suggestion for a lesson in enrichment. Have a wonderful Sunday, and thank you again for the exceptional rating.
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I should have added, ?Your story could motivate readers to do more for others.?
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They're you go ;)
