A Truly Eternal Love-Sonnet
On the losing of my wife, at an early age57 total reviews
Comment from pmait
This is a fine sonnet, Jaybird, seems Shakespearian, although you don't seem to have entered it in the Shakespearian contest. The tug on the heart is strong, as is the courage of the speaker. I question the word 'twill, which is a contraction of it and will, and that seems awkward. Wouldn't it work better to just use "will"? Or does that change the meaning for you?
reply by the author on 10-May-2016
This is a fine sonnet, Jaybird, seems Shakespearian, although you don't seem to have entered it in the Shakespearian contest. The tug on the heart is strong, as is the courage of the speaker. I question the word 'twill, which is a contraction of it and will, and that seems awkward. Wouldn't it work better to just use "will"? Or does that change the meaning for you?
Comment Written 10-May-2016
reply by the author on 10-May-2016
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Thank you so much for your gracious comment.You are probably right about the use of 'twill and I might just follow your advise
Comment from zanya
A powerful contemplation of the loss of a beloved partner - effective imagery 'winter in my heart'and 'the past is gone, I cannot linger there'- so painful- I can empathise - I Lost my beloved early also
reply by the author on 10-May-2016
A powerful contemplation of the loss of a beloved partner - effective imagery 'winter in my heart'and 'the past is gone, I cannot linger there'- so painful- I can empathise - I Lost my beloved early also
Comment Written 10-May-2016
reply by the author on 10-May-2016
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I can feel your pain.It really does hurt.I thank you for your caring comment
Comment from Marykelly
This is a sad love song. Your wife is gone and it's hard to face life without her. Your loneliness dominates the tone of the poem and everything comes back to the great loss. As painful as your heartbreak is, you were fortunate to have the kind of love that lasts forever. The sonnet is a good choice of form for your thoughts and you adhere to the form well.
reply by the author on 06-May-2016
This is a sad love song. Your wife is gone and it's hard to face life without her. Your loneliness dominates the tone of the poem and everything comes back to the great loss. As painful as your heartbreak is, you were fortunate to have the kind of love that lasts forever. The sonnet is a good choice of form for your thoughts and you adhere to the form well.
Comment Written 06-May-2016
reply by the author on 06-May-2016
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Thanks you dear Mary.Your comments was greatly appreciated,sort of made my day
Comment from MizKat
Hi Jaybird1,
Your poem is beautifully written. It is sad to lose a loved one, but just remember that you'll meet again in heaven when it's your turn to go. I love writing poetry that rhymes too. Most of my poetry is spiritual and inspirational. I look forward to reading more of your work.
MizKat
reply by the author on 06-May-2016
Hi Jaybird1,
Your poem is beautifully written. It is sad to lose a loved one, but just remember that you'll meet again in heaven when it's your turn to go. I love writing poetry that rhymes too. Most of my poetry is spiritual and inspirational. I look forward to reading more of your work.
MizKat
Comment Written 06-May-2016
reply by the author on 06-May-2016
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Thank you Miz, this really inspiresme
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You're very welcome Jay. MizKat
Comment from GeraldS
This is a nice tribute. It is well-written and easily understandable. And many readers will empathize with the sentiment. Whether as a result of death or illness many of us old timers have nothing to hang onto except our memories. They indeed are ageless and can be almost as precious as life itself.
reply by the author on 06-May-2016
This is a nice tribute. It is well-written and easily understandable. And many readers will empathize with the sentiment. Whether as a result of death or illness many of us old timers have nothing to hang onto except our memories. They indeed are ageless and can be almost as precious as life itself.
Comment Written 06-May-2016
reply by the author on 06-May-2016
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Gerald-thank you,this really
cheers me,greatly appreciated
Comment from Jonadab Ezerie
I am very impressed with your work. It gives me the encouragement to improve my writing skill. Unique writing skills. Good job
reply by the author on 06-May-2016
I am very impressed with your work. It gives me the encouragement to improve my writing skill. Unique writing skills. Good job
Comment Written 06-May-2016
reply by the author on 06-May-2016
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This really inspires me. Thanks
and I must checkyou out
Comment from heyjude
Jaybird, so sorry about the loss of your wife. Isn't
it good that we do have those memories of our
loved ones that linger on and help ease the pain.
You expressed yourself well.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 06-May-2016
Jaybird, so sorry about the loss of your wife. Isn't
it good that we do have those memories of our
loved ones that linger on and help ease the pain.
You expressed yourself well.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 06-May-2016
reply by the author on 06-May-2016
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Gr eatly appreciated. I must
check you out