Spiritual Work
Viewing comments for Chapter 34 "Inventory"Poems and Essays
15 total reviews
Comment from Stacia Ann
Hi, Teri! Thought I'd stop by. Thanks for sharing this. Fine spiritual/philosophic poetry.
It's visually striking, on first impression. Blue roses are so mysterious, lovely, almost mythic--they don't actually exist in nature, you're probably aware, as it's impossible to cultivate a primary color like blue.
This may be connected to theme--kindness to each other is as rare as blue roses?
You might consider a blue border/blue font to heighten the visual appeal--just a thought.
I like the theme of self-inventory of our actions and treatment of each other. I try to do this, for myself as much as others, to be honest--I feel so much better when I walk away from an interaction in which I've been kind rather than hurtful.
The second stanza moves into the theme of your hurt when treated badly by others. I think there is always that moment of shock, when someone attacks us for no apparent reason--I have experienced this over issues like my writing. It feels very personal, but what to keep in mind is that is not so much a plot but rather more about the other individual's issues--jealously, perhaps, is the first thing that leaps to mind? Just saying. At any rate, I tend to shut such people down. Give them no further ammunition: a terse "Thanks for you opinion," etc., usually does the job. Don't engage. They'll find another victim.
So, sorry, that is off the topic of your poem here but just some generally "writer's advice" you may take or leave.
Thanks again for sharing this.
Stacia
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2016
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Hi, Teri! Thought I'd stop by. Thanks for sharing this. Fine spiritual/philosophic poetry.
It's visually striking, on first impression. Blue roses are so mysterious, lovely, almost mythic--they don't actually exist in nature, you're probably aware, as it's impossible to cultivate a primary color like blue.
This may be connected to theme--kindness to each other is as rare as blue roses?
You might consider a blue border/blue font to heighten the visual appeal--just a thought.
I like the theme of self-inventory of our actions and treatment of each other. I try to do this, for myself as much as others, to be honest--I feel so much better when I walk away from an interaction in which I've been kind rather than hurtful.
The second stanza moves into the theme of your hurt when treated badly by others. I think there is always that moment of shock, when someone attacks us for no apparent reason--I have experienced this over issues like my writing. It feels very personal, but what to keep in mind is that is not so much a plot but rather more about the other individual's issues--jealously, perhaps, is the first thing that leaps to mind? Just saying. At any rate, I tend to shut such people down. Give them no further ammunition: a terse "Thanks for you opinion," etc., usually does the job. Don't engage. They'll find another victim.
So, sorry, that is off the topic of your poem here but just some generally "writer's advice" you may take or leave.
Thanks again for sharing this.
Stacia
Comment Written 20-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2016
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Thanks for the review. I truly do give them very much mind. This just came to me one day and out it came. hugs, Teri
Comment from John Parkin
Good food for thought and a lesson to be lived by. When I was a strong Catholic I was taught to take inventory of my daily deeds and ask forgiveness. I have since fallen away but carry on strong beliefs and the inventory is still a daily task that makes me think before I act.
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2016
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Good food for thought and a lesson to be lived by. When I was a strong Catholic I was taught to take inventory of my daily deeds and ask forgiveness. I have since fallen away but carry on strong beliefs and the inventory is still a daily task that makes me think before I act.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2016
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Thank you for the great review. Teri
Comment from Ric Myworld
It's so sad how many people are so miserable that they want to bring everyone else down, too. You just can't let those people bother you, cause if you do, they win. There is always a few bad apples. Thanks for sharing another fine poem. :-)
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2016
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It's so sad how many people are so miserable that they want to bring everyone else down, too. You just can't let those people bother you, cause if you do, they win. There is always a few bad apples. Thanks for sharing another fine poem. :-)
Comment Written 19-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2016
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Thank you my friend for the great review. Teri
Comment from patcelaw
There are those who seem to delight in finding the least little thing that is wrong in a poem and then giving only a four. I never give a four, if I can't give at least a five I just do not review. Patricia
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2016
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There are those who seem to delight in finding the least little thing that is wrong in a poem and then giving only a four. I never give a four, if I can't give at least a five I just do not review. Patricia
Comment Written 18-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2016
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Thank you for the great review. hugs, Teri
Comment from AnnaLinda
Dear Teri,
This poem of yours has a perfect melody and message.
Wow, how true your penned words are here...straight from
your heart and rhymed to perfection and conveyed perfectly.
You are in your top form here! Your first line is so strong!
I wish we all did that each day...take inventory of our heart.
You got right to the point here with your poem. I so agree
with everything you have said.
Your reminder of thinking before acting/reviewing applies
to every area of our life. I think the best poems erupt right
out of our spirits and then find their way to the page by
an obedient scribe.
This is one of those poems,
Linda
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2016
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Dear Teri,
This poem of yours has a perfect melody and message.
Wow, how true your penned words are here...straight from
your heart and rhymed to perfection and conveyed perfectly.
You are in your top form here! Your first line is so strong!
I wish we all did that each day...take inventory of our heart.
You got right to the point here with your poem. I so agree
with everything you have said.
Your reminder of thinking before acting/reviewing applies
to every area of our life. I think the best poems erupt right
out of our spirits and then find their way to the page by
an obedient scribe.
This is one of those poems,
Linda
Comment Written 18-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2016
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You made me have tears ( that's good). Thank you for the great review. Hugs, Teri
Comment from jlsavell
once again you have created a beautiful work. yes, I do believe we all have received unkind reviews and unkind words. There is no need, nor is there a need to insult each other. wonderful work... jimi
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2016
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once again you have created a beautiful work. yes, I do believe we all have received unkind reviews and unkind words. There is no need, nor is there a need to insult each other. wonderful work... jimi
Comment Written 18-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2016
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Thank you my friend for the great review. hugs, Teri
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi, Teri
= Boy, there is just NO room for rude reviews.
= When I get them, I kindly ask them NOT to read me any longer.
= And the ones that give a very vague reason, and then give a 3 or 4, are uncalled for--arrogant.
= I haven't had many, but one is too many.
= I've already spent a couple of hours on a review, and still given a =5=
= If a story is good, but the SPAG leaves a lot to be desired, I help the person, not bring them down.
= Okay, off my soapbox! (*<*)
= Excellent write, my friend.
=::= A Smile Is A Frown Turned Upside Down! =::=
Jacqueline M Franklin (*_*)
=::= Feel free to visit my profile on Amazon.com =::=
amazon.com/author/jacquelinefranklin
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2016
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Hi, Teri
= Boy, there is just NO room for rude reviews.
= When I get them, I kindly ask them NOT to read me any longer.
= And the ones that give a very vague reason, and then give a 3 or 4, are uncalled for--arrogant.
= I haven't had many, but one is too many.
= I've already spent a couple of hours on a review, and still given a =5=
= If a story is good, but the SPAG leaves a lot to be desired, I help the person, not bring them down.
= Okay, off my soapbox! (*<*)
= Excellent write, my friend.
=::= A Smile Is A Frown Turned Upside Down! =::=
Jacqueline M Franklin (*_*)
=::= Feel free to visit my profile on Amazon.com =::=
amazon.com/author/jacquelinefranklin
Comment Written 17-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2016
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I give as honest review I can but I try to be nice about it. Hugs, Teri
Comment from damommy
A much needed message for everyone, but especially for a very few. Thank goodness there are more kind people on FS than hateful ones. I just ignore the bad ones, and say "thank you."
You know how it is. Rarely, do the people the message is meant for thinks it applies to them.
Your poem flows well and the rhyming is extremely good.
I think it will hit the spot with a lot of people. 8-)
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2016
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A much needed message for everyone, but especially for a very few. Thank goodness there are more kind people on FS than hateful ones. I just ignore the bad ones, and say "thank you."
You know how it is. Rarely, do the people the message is meant for thinks it applies to them.
Your poem flows well and the rhyming is extremely good.
I think it will hit the spot with a lot of people. 8-)
Comment Written 17-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2016
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Thank you for the great review. I just hope I didn't offend anyone. It just came to mind after a few days ago of that. hugs, Teri
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You didn't offend anyone. If so, only the ones that needed it. LOL
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Thank you so much. Hugs, Teri
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You didn't offend anyone. If so, only the ones that needed it. LOL
Comment from BeasPeas
A very good poem with a good message. Hopefully it works across the board giving and getting. Taking an inventory of our day before going to sleep at night helps keep us on the right track. That's my practice. Marilyn
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2016
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A very good poem with a good message. Hopefully it works across the board giving and getting. Taking an inventory of our day before going to sleep at night helps keep us on the right track. That's my practice. Marilyn
Comment Written 17-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2016
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Thank you for the great review. I guess it is whatever anyone wants and how they do it. Hugs, Teri
Comment from heyjude
Teri, I really like this and the message of checking my heart
and being careful about what I say to others. I certainly don't
want to be unkind in a review or otherwise. Thanks for making
us think about what we do and how we act.
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2016
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Teri, I really like this and the message of checking my heart
and being careful about what I say to others. I certainly don't
want to be unkind in a review or otherwise. Thanks for making
us think about what we do and how we act.
Comment Written 17-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2016
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Thank you my friend. I have never seen any of your reviews not kind. Hugs, Teri
