Comment from jusylee72

Excellent

Very well written and thought provoking. I like the contrasts. We have to wait and learn both sides of life to succeed. So so short have to run off to work. I will re read this later.

 Comment Written 28-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 28-Mar-2016

Thanks for taking time in your busy day to read my post. I much appreciate the support and encouragement, J.

Comment from fionageorge

Excellent

Oh, yes. Great choice of word and structure (and you have a reader with whom these thoughts do resonate). I like the way you have presented these thoughts in a logical and through provoking manner. Thanks for sharing and warmest regards, Marijke :o)

 Comment Written 28-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 28-Mar-2016

.Hi, Marijke. So nice to hear from you!

Thanks for this thoughtful and generous review. I very much appreciate the encouragement and support.

:) Bev

Comment from DR DIP

Excellent

Really interesting piece W. I love the setout I think it works. Thanks for sharing with us. All these asked questions in bold print in red is very effective.

dip

 Comment Written 28-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 28-Mar-2016

Hi, DR DIP

Thank you for telling me you liked the formatting. That's very helpful.

I appreciate your kind and generous review.

:) Bev

Comment from honeytree

Excellent

Very interesting art work
for these very interesting.
The words make one think
the art work as well.
Imagine what is out there in space
Maybe very similar happenings on earth.

Honeytree

 Comment Written 28-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 28-Mar-2016

Thanks for the kind review, honeytree.

:) Bev

Comment from TPAC

Excellent

Magnificent statement, explosive ending with leading lines formed descriptive. If, a good start to a maybe: in my opinion a good read.

 Comment Written 28-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 28-Mar-2016

Thanks very much for this generous and encouraging review. I appreciate you taking the time to read my post.

:) Bev

Comment from joannakruk

Excellent

A powerful peace that I'm trying to understand and thus has captured me. Is the theme that spirituality, religion and a belief in a greater being or energy are pointless? Is it that, the only truth is scientific and there is nothing beyond? Or is it that there is a greater power but we also must accept accountability for our own actions. If it is the final option then I am aligned with your view. I think it is a cop out to remain inactive by virtue of a belief that fate will remedy everything. However I simultaneously believe that the universe sends us energy and messages that we must recognize and incorporate into our lives. I love the format of your poem. Thank you for raising so many issues to ponder.
Jo

 Comment Written 28-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 28-Mar-2016

Hi, Jo

I think the bottom line of this piece is that if a person lives long enough, that person will discover that they have been the recipient of much good which they have done nothing observable to bring about. I don't think either religion or
science have all the answers. Personal accountability for our own actions is, I agree, the path with the most integrity.

Thanks so very much for your grand review.

:) Bev

Comment from Stacia Ann

Excellent

Thanks for sharing this, Bev! Glad I stopped by.
The last line of "a singular, glorious cell" resonates. Perhaps God? The connection of the spiritual and scientific in "glorious cell" is powerful.
I like the repetition of "as if" with each stanza, suggesting a tentativeness, as questioning.
I'm interested in the visual of the swan--it is a beautiful image, but I'm wondering about the symbolism. I'll have to look it up:)
Thanks for sharing this!
Stacia

 Comment Written 27-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 28-Mar-2016

Hi, Stacia

Thanks so much for this great review. I really appreciate you taking time to read it.

I have a particular connection with the swan - underneath the body beats a fearless heart.

Great to hear from you!

:) Bev

Comment from Green Lake Girl

Exceptional

Very impressive, Bev. It's clear you've put much thought into this vast and meaningful poem. Your poetry always leaves me pondering. My take-away is that every day is new--regenerated from the day before. Life's experiences pile up and it's up to us to learn and carry on as best we can. Loved the repetitive, "As if". Great organization of complex thoughts. Simply perfect!

 Comment Written 27-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016

Hi, Marietta

Thank you for this awesome review! I have really enjoyed getting all the insights from the reviewers. Everyone seems to bring something a bit different to the table. I totally agree that it's up to us to make the best of what we're given. I do think, however, we need to expand those possibilities by looking beyond the borders of the familiar. I've a particular passion for physics and there's some mind-blowing stuff out there.

So appreciate your ongoing encouragement and support, my friend. Thanks for stopping by on a busy day.

:) Bev

reply by Green Lake Girl on 27-Mar-2016

You're very adept at digging beyond the familiar, Bev. A real talent!

reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016

Thanks for the compliment, Marietta. :))

Comment from Connie C

Exceptional

What I love about this poem, Bev, is that you get me to thinking. I read it over a couple of times, and each "as if" stood out on its own but also seemed to connect to all the others. My very favorite was "As if warriors achieve more with a pure heart than armed with soulless steel."
This is very different than your very fine prose. You are so talented, my friend.
Hugs,
Connie

 Comment Written 27-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016

Hi, Connie

Happy Easter, my friend

Thank you so very much for this gracious and generous review. Your words of encouragement mean a lot to me, especially given your own excellence as a poet. Everyone has been most kind with supportive insights and personal wisdom. I'm grateful for FanStory friends like you!

Hugs, Bev

P.S. Did the Easter Bunny bring Jack anything special? :)

Comment from Dustybones

Excellent

Wow. this is very good. You have achieved more with a pure heart
with all of these As Ifs. This must have taken you a long time to figure out. Great job.

 Comment Written 27-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016

Hi, Dustybones. I sure appreciate your very kind review. Your words are both encouraging and supportive.

:) Bev

reply by Dustybones on 27-Mar-2016

WC