Little Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 370 "Crescent Moon"Small and Specialty Poems
11 total reviews
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
Very creatively done. The moon has a magical influence on humans. Nothing more romantic like a moonlight sky with your loved one. Just for the record, on my tablet the crescent is distorted, although on my PC it's perfect.
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2016
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Very creatively done. The moon has a magical influence on humans. Nothing more romantic like a moonlight sky with your loved one. Just for the record, on my tablet the crescent is distorted, although on my PC it's perfect.
Comment Written 04-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2016
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Thank you Sandra, I've noticed similar distortion so too, between my iPad and my PC. It's due to the different character sets between Apple and Microsoft.
Comment from I am Cat
Hello Tom, I love the shape of this, and I'm not sure I've ever seen you use someone else's images... I rather like the switch up... I was a bit surprised you didn't use any two syllable words... those were the hardest to figure out, but this is done nicely... and the shape is gorgeous. well done
Cat
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2016
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Hello Tom, I love the shape of this, and I'm not sure I've ever seen you use someone else's images... I rather like the switch up... I was a bit surprised you didn't use any two syllable words... those were the hardest to figure out, but this is done nicely... and the shape is gorgeous. well done
Cat
Comment Written 04-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2016
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Thank you Cat. Yeah, you really have to watch the stress in two syllable words. I avoid using other people's images as much as possible. Glad you liked it.
Comment from lightink
Haha, you just prove to Gynt that it's not a tetrameter! You changed around the number of feet between rhymes quite a bit! Both the display and the moon metaphor are gorgeous! After all, there's always a beam of light somewhere- regardless if we see it or not :).
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2016
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Haha, you just prove to Gynt that it's not a tetrameter! You changed around the number of feet between rhymes quite a bit! Both the display and the moon metaphor are gorgeous! After all, there's always a beam of light somewhere- regardless if we see it or not :).
Comment Written 04-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2016
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Thank you Jyoti. Yes, always somewhere.
Comment from ciliverde
Ah, another Monometer poem, here describing the lovely crescent moon...in shape as well as word.
I read it out loud and it sounded good, a thin slice of flowing imagery, evoking that crescent slice aloft. Nice presentation and good word choice.
Carol
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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Ah, another Monometer poem, here describing the lovely crescent moon...in shape as well as word.
I read it out loud and it sounded good, a thin slice of flowing imagery, evoking that crescent slice aloft. Nice presentation and good word choice.
Carol
Comment Written 03-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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Thank you Carol.
Comment from Joan E.
As a former teacher, I like your point about using the Monometer form to teach iambic meter. But you made the lesson so artful by adding the crescent shape to your poem--which must not have been easy! I enjoyed your rhymes and your addressing the moon directly. Cheers- Joan
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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As a former teacher, I like your point about using the Monometer form to teach iambic meter. But you made the lesson so artful by adding the crescent shape to your poem--which must not have been easy! I enjoyed your rhymes and your addressing the moon directly. Cheers- Joan
Comment Written 03-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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Thank You Joan. You are right. It wasn't easy.
Comment from Just2Write
This is a nice shape poem. The monometer poem is one that Evil Eddy must clap his hands in delight when an unsuspecting poet tries to post. My hat's off to you, Tom. I can't even open the advanced editor.
I like the sentiment of this write, and the crescent moon you create.
Rose.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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This is a nice shape poem. The monometer poem is one that Evil Eddy must clap his hands in delight when an unsuspecting poet tries to post. My hat's off to you, Tom. I can't even open the advanced editor.
I like the sentiment of this write, and the crescent moon you create.
Rose.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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Thank you Rose. That editor is often no fun to use. Here's to Evil Edddy. Lol.
Comment from brenda bickers
Hi Treischel,
I have noticed a couple of poems on the site over the last few days with this particular form. It looks easy but am thinking it probably isn't.
I must have a go at one.
Brenda
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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Hi Treischel,
I have noticed a couple of poems on the site over the last few days with this particular form. It looks easy but am thinking it probably isn't.
I must have a go at one.
Brenda
Comment Written 03-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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Thank you Brenda. Yes, give it a try. It it a very good way to practice iambic meter.
Comment from Pantygynt
This is a fine treatment of the monometer turning it into a shape poem and phrasing the content irregularly to avoid bein accused of writing disguised tetrameter or othe iambic forms, which most of the entrants in the recent competition failed to do. However given that the form is a training medium with a very specific purpose that is probably not a valid criticism anyway.
I think an errant "h" has crept into your fourth line, surely "were" not "where".
where there,
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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This is a fine treatment of the monometer turning it into a shape poem and phrasing the content irregularly to avoid bein accused of writing disguised tetrameter or othe iambic forms, which most of the entrants in the recent competition failed to do. However given that the form is a training medium with a very specific purpose that is probably not a valid criticism anyway.
I think an errant "h" has crept into your fourth line, surely "were" not "where".
where there,
Comment Written 03-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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Thank you Pantygynt. Ah yes, you are right. Fixed it.
Comment from flylikeaneagle
Treischel: you look comfortable after your outing shooting photos of the snow. We got plowed out by the Sunshine grocery team with a snow plow. Yes, amazing! School is called off. I read and read and got to another level. Now, 17 and with your poem, 18. Thank you!
I like your interesting poems. You try new ones all the time and inspire me. I like the crescent moon with its curved shape. Great iambic beat and message of love. You shine brightly in the sky, too! I like the alliterations you used, (s and g words).
Watching CNN and the debates. Got the coffee and hot soup going! Thanks for your friendship, my Minnesota poet! flylikeaneagle
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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Treischel: you look comfortable after your outing shooting photos of the snow. We got plowed out by the Sunshine grocery team with a snow plow. Yes, amazing! School is called off. I read and read and got to another level. Now, 17 and with your poem, 18. Thank you!
I like your interesting poems. You try new ones all the time and inspire me. I like the crescent moon with its curved shape. Great iambic beat and message of love. You shine brightly in the sky, too! I like the alliterations you used, (s and g words).
Watching CNN and the debates. Got the coffee and hot soup going! Thanks for your friendship, my Minnesota poet! flylikeaneagle
Comment Written 03-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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Thank you flylikeaneagle, cozy up and enjoy the coffee.
Comment from dorts
You are so right the new moon has a look about it that makes your being feel good. Like new beginnings, and if you are at all romantic, brings new meaning to a new love. Loved your poem.
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reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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You are so right the new moon has a look about it that makes your being feel good. Like new beginnings, and if you are at all romantic, brings new meaning to a new love. Loved your poem.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2016
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Thank you forts.
