Sonnets
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Earth's Final Day "A collection of sonnets
18 total reviews
Comment from Sefiros
The first poem I read was influenced by another economic tale, so my reaction was one of skepticism. When you really think about it, humanity has only been around for a few thousand years; the planet is far older. So it's quite possible that humanity will be extinct by the time the end comes. Still an enjoyable read.
The second poem was a general warning for humanity to act before it was too late. Heres hoping someone will listen.
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2015
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The first poem I read was influenced by another economic tale, so my reaction was one of skepticism. When you really think about it, humanity has only been around for a few thousand years; the planet is far older. So it's quite possible that humanity will be extinct by the time the end comes. Still an enjoyable read.
The second poem was a general warning for humanity to act before it was too late. Heres hoping someone will listen.
Comment Written 19-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2015
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Thank you so much. I agree with your thoughtful observations. I hope the more optimistic piece, the second one, has an impact as well. mikey
Comment from seaglass
This is a timely poem and reminds us the lethargy is the enemy. As long as greed lobbies against making corrections and leaders deny science, it looks hopeless. I'm so thankful for those who endlessly and tirelessly fights this battle.
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2015
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This is a timely poem and reminds us the lethargy is the enemy. As long as greed lobbies against making corrections and leaders deny science, it looks hopeless. I'm so thankful for those who endlessly and tirelessly fights this battle.
Comment Written 14-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2015
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Lightnk has a whole assault planned for January with a crown of sonnets on the subject. Glad you liked this. Jeesh, I hope people wake up. It is real. Are people that nuts? mikey
Comment from l.raven
HI Michael, every word so very true...we better wake up...or we will wish we had...there is still time...I love the wording....beautifully written...and the picture stunning...I will check out the others...a wonderful idea...Luff Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2015
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HI Michael, every word so very true...we better wake up...or we will wish we had...there is still time...I love the wording....beautifully written...and the picture stunning...I will check out the others...a wonderful idea...Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 14-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2015
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Hi Dear Linda, Whew. Look at all the stars. :))
So pleased you enjoyed, Thank you so very much.
Hope you have a wonderful Christmas and New Year
xxxxxxxoooooooo mikey
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HI Michael, you deserve all the stars a person can get...you are a sweetheart...you are sooooooo welcome...and you and your family have a wonderful Christmas and a Happy New Year as well...xxoo Luff Linda
Comment from Realist101
What an awesome project Michael. Very good idea. I fear tho that our planet is probably doomed. Humans are just too greedy and selfish and so many honestly don't think there's a real problem. At least thru words you and the others are trying to bring about some awareness! Lovely work. Sonnets are impossible for people like me! :D S.
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What an awesome project Michael. Very good idea. I fear tho that our planet is probably doomed. Humans are just too greedy and selfish and so many honestly don't think there's a real problem. At least thru words you and the others are trying to bring about some awareness! Lovely work. Sonnets are impossible for people like me! :D S.
Comment Written 13-Dec-2015
Comment from krys123
Mikey;
-quite an undertaking your done to be able to write an acrostic and a sonnet respectively and doing it very well.
- I read some of the other writings about a global annihilation due to man's apathetic attitude towards his environment and yours really is excellently written.
- the imagery that you presented in both of your sonnets are exquisitely expressed in vividly and demonstratively described throughout both of these.
- new good use of enjambment which is the running on of thought and concept between a line and stanza to the next without a syntactical break.
- your rhyming in both and each of your rhyming words were contingent to the meaning and concept of each line therefore making all of your rhythm to flow smoothly. also good rhyming in which neither was forced nor labored.
- your rhythmic meter I felt was done very well and your meter being iambic pentameter in your cadence, timing and tempo were all helpful in making the reading clear, fluid and easy.
- the picture was very relative and complementary to your writing.
- I've been enjoying reading these environmental poems including your own which I felt was admirable.
- thank you for sharing and posting and may the good Lord be with you always Mikey.
Alex
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Mikey;
-quite an undertaking your done to be able to write an acrostic and a sonnet respectively and doing it very well.
- I read some of the other writings about a global annihilation due to man's apathetic attitude towards his environment and yours really is excellently written.
- the imagery that you presented in both of your sonnets are exquisitely expressed in vividly and demonstratively described throughout both of these.
- new good use of enjambment which is the running on of thought and concept between a line and stanza to the next without a syntactical break.
- your rhyming in both and each of your rhyming words were contingent to the meaning and concept of each line therefore making all of your rhythm to flow smoothly. also good rhyming in which neither was forced nor labored.
- your rhythmic meter I felt was done very well and your meter being iambic pentameter in your cadence, timing and tempo were all helpful in making the reading clear, fluid and easy.
- the picture was very relative and complementary to your writing.
- I've been enjoying reading these environmental poems including your own which I felt was admirable.
- thank you for sharing and posting and may the good Lord be with you always Mikey.
Alex
Comment Written 12-Dec-2015
Comment from Gloria ....
Well Mikey I think you've done a terrific job with a double acrostic. Yowza and you didn't exactly pick the easiest acrostic to work with--Ha. So dark and yet complemented with a secondary acrostic that holds hope.
Just a couple of point in the second sonnet, there are a few areas that need a wee bit of a change. :))
A couple of suggestions for your consideration:
How we consume the fuels that do us harm - you were a few syllables short of a foot on that one.
So, sacrificing nature there's no doubt.
Now think instead of oceans,teeming fish
I love the combination of the two, one is darker and one is lighter, just like night and day.
Great job, you.
Gloria
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Well Mikey I think you've done a terrific job with a double acrostic. Yowza and you didn't exactly pick the easiest acrostic to work with--Ha. So dark and yet complemented with a secondary acrostic that holds hope.
Just a couple of point in the second sonnet, there are a few areas that need a wee bit of a change. :))
A couple of suggestions for your consideration:
How we consume the fuels that do us harm - you were a few syllables short of a foot on that one.
So, sacrificing nature there's no doubt.
Now think instead of oceans,teeming fish
I love the combination of the two, one is darker and one is lighter, just like night and day.
Great job, you.
Gloria
Comment Written 12-Dec-2015
Comment from Alan K Pease
Timely is your poem when almost 200 countries have signed the Paris agreement. The worst offender is the U.S and in a recent visit to China I found Bejing and several other cities intolerable. Let us hope that everyone sticks to the accord. May you have a Merry Christmas and New Year. Good luck in the project.
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Timely is your poem when almost 200 countries have signed the Paris agreement. The worst offender is the U.S and in a recent visit to China I found Bejing and several other cities intolerable. Let us hope that everyone sticks to the accord. May you have a Merry Christmas and New Year. Good luck in the project.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2015
Comment from I am Cat
I'm so glad this has some hope in it... i"m finding many of the others don't. You at least offer solutions, or a view into what it COULD be.
Humanity claimed triumphs bold and grand.
Someday, perhaps, our story will unfold.
(someday... well, I think it's starting to)
For surely there's some hint we walked this land.
Is not a single word left to be told?
Now, sit by shaded tree enjoy the breeze.
All seems as though life's fine; why worry so?
Leave well enough alone now, if you please.
(I love this part the best, above)
Don't spin, you worried few, your tales of woe.
All's hushed--the Earth turns on in endless blight.
Yes, man has gone-- we died without a fight.
(ah, but there's that part at the end... lol )
Response is needed now--set high the bar
To clean our air and oceans. Rearrange
How fuels we overuse do harm.
Someday, our atmosphere will thin, no doubt.
(at last, a solution!)
For temperatures that rise give great alarm,
Inciting melting ice and global drought.
Now think instead of oceans teemed with fish
And air so clean it doesn't sting your eyes
Let forest rains return-it is our wish:
(and why we should do something... some of us are so sick constantly...
like me. I'm allergic to everything. I wasn't this way when I was younger... but I am now)
Deliverance from man-polluted skies.
And let us all do everything we can
Yes, bring about a better Earth Day plan.
(the first line of this seems to want to run to the second line, yet you provide a period after the first... would it not read better like this:
Deliver (us) from man-polluted skies( )
(a)nd let us all do everything we can(;)
Yes, bring about a better Earth Day plan.
(just a suggestion... )
Well done Mikey, I actually like yours the best so far... lol
it's not as complicated and maudlin... but that's me. ;)
Mwah
Cat
(feel better, ok?)
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I'm so glad this has some hope in it... i"m finding many of the others don't. You at least offer solutions, or a view into what it COULD be.
Humanity claimed triumphs bold and grand.
Someday, perhaps, our story will unfold.
(someday... well, I think it's starting to)
For surely there's some hint we walked this land.
Is not a single word left to be told?
Now, sit by shaded tree enjoy the breeze.
All seems as though life's fine; why worry so?
Leave well enough alone now, if you please.
(I love this part the best, above)
Don't spin, you worried few, your tales of woe.
All's hushed--the Earth turns on in endless blight.
Yes, man has gone-- we died without a fight.
(ah, but there's that part at the end... lol )
Response is needed now--set high the bar
To clean our air and oceans. Rearrange
How fuels we overuse do harm.
Someday, our atmosphere will thin, no doubt.
(at last, a solution!)
For temperatures that rise give great alarm,
Inciting melting ice and global drought.
Now think instead of oceans teemed with fish
And air so clean it doesn't sting your eyes
Let forest rains return-it is our wish:
(and why we should do something... some of us are so sick constantly...
like me. I'm allergic to everything. I wasn't this way when I was younger... but I am now)
Deliverance from man-polluted skies.
And let us all do everything we can
Yes, bring about a better Earth Day plan.
(the first line of this seems to want to run to the second line, yet you provide a period after the first... would it not read better like this:
Deliver (us) from man-polluted skies( )
(a)nd let us all do everything we can(;)
Yes, bring about a better Earth Day plan.
(just a suggestion... )
Well done Mikey, I actually like yours the best so far... lol
it's not as complicated and maudlin... but that's me. ;)
Mwah
Cat
(feel better, ok?)
Comment Written 12-Dec-2015
Comment from nordicgirl
This nakes a much more powerful statement as a pair. They dooboth stand alone with their own strengt but together there is more reflection comparing the two points of view. Perfect rhyme and meter and all other skills brought to bear.
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This nakes a much more powerful statement as a pair. They dooboth stand alone with their own strengt but together there is more reflection comparing the two points of view. Perfect rhyme and meter and all other skills brought to bear.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2015
Comment from Treischel
This set of two outstanding ACROSTIC sonnets is truly fabulous. Both hung upon the phrase - Earths Final Days, they carry a message of doom and hope respectively. Very well crafted verse flowing on iambic pentameter and abab rhymed. It was arranged with a Sestet, Quintet, and Tercet as the phrase demands, it still carries the 14 lines of a Sonnet, and even a Volta at line 9. Excellent use of text and background. A well blended composition image and text. This is brilliant!
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This set of two outstanding ACROSTIC sonnets is truly fabulous. Both hung upon the phrase - Earths Final Days, they carry a message of doom and hope respectively. Very well crafted verse flowing on iambic pentameter and abab rhymed. It was arranged with a Sestet, Quintet, and Tercet as the phrase demands, it still carries the 14 lines of a Sonnet, and even a Volta at line 9. Excellent use of text and background. A well blended composition image and text. This is brilliant!
Comment Written 12-Dec-2015
