Act of Endurance
Viewing comments for Chapter 97 "I Do"Dawn of Chaos
32 total reviews
Comment from royowen
Beautifully written my friend, it sounds like you've got a great series giving the methods of sheer endurance during a series chapter like writings which could be extremely useful to others, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2023
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Beautifully written my friend, it sounds like you've got a great series giving the methods of sheer endurance during a series chapter like writings which could be extremely useful to others, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 14-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2023
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Coming from you, this view I highly appreciate, still holding my flaws in my written presentation, but capturing my reader interests, prevailing my thoughts attempted for them to perceive. Thanking you for your generous rate, and encouraging words.
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Well done
Comment from Isabel Fontes
Your writing style is undoubtedly unique.
I had to try to understand the underlying message, but the analogies you used were quite remarkable.
However, I still wonder what the first victory mentioned in the text was.
It seems like the words used are fighting their own battle.
I wish you good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2023
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Your writing style is undoubtedly unique.
I had to try to understand the underlying message, but the analogies you used were quite remarkable.
However, I still wonder what the first victory mentioned in the text was.
It seems like the words used are fighting their own battle.
I wish you good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 14-Sep-2023
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2023
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Contest passed, I do suffer conveying my thoughts properly, working on this chain about my neck. Thanking you for that generous rate despite those found flaws. Have a blessed day.
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You are most welcome, TPAC.
Best wishes.
Comment from joycetreasures
Hello TPAC,
I am trying to understand how your piece fits your title, "I Do," My first thought was, this poem is going to be about marriage. Yet, as I move through your work, I think it's about nature (brown leaves, river, wind). Then as I read further, I think you are alone knight riding to protect things of the earth. As I continued, it sounds like you were speaking of the different environments you see around you. I recommend taking one topic, like spring (only an example) and writing around that season. Or, maybe you were doing this, and I didn't get it. In the end, I tried to figure out where your title," I Do" fitted in your poem. I can see you are a very deep thinker. You may want to add more punctuation to your lines, so a reader will know where to stop and begin. This poem reminds me of being outside and thinking about things around a person. Every poet writes their thoughts and you wrote yours. Thanks for sharing. God bless you. Happy writingð???
reply by the author on 10-Apr-2020
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Hello TPAC,
I am trying to understand how your piece fits your title, "I Do," My first thought was, this poem is going to be about marriage. Yet, as I move through your work, I think it's about nature (brown leaves, river, wind). Then as I read further, I think you are alone knight riding to protect things of the earth. As I continued, it sounds like you were speaking of the different environments you see around you. I recommend taking one topic, like spring (only an example) and writing around that season. Or, maybe you were doing this, and I didn't get it. In the end, I tried to figure out where your title," I Do" fitted in your poem. I can see you are a very deep thinker. You may want to add more punctuation to your lines, so a reader will know where to stop and begin. This poem reminds me of being outside and thinking about things around a person. Every poet writes their thoughts and you wrote yours. Thanks for sharing. God bless you. Happy writingð???
Comment Written 09-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 10-Apr-2020
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Nice advise, this write I do is about my experience at FS as a writer, detailing a tree leaf as a poem. You gave me a lot to consider, thanking you for your generous rate and welcomed views?
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Woe, worries, pains, sufferings are part and parcel, compulsory of and for living and winning; this poem promotes the view for winning after struggling; inspirational; well said, well done.
reply by the author on 10-Apr-2020
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Woe, worries, pains, sufferings are part and parcel, compulsory of and for living and winning; this poem promotes the view for winning after struggling; inspirational; well said, well done.
Comment Written 09-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 10-Apr-2020
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You hit that nail on the head, appreciating those words illustrating a coherent read for my reader, thanking you for your generous rate and warming sentiments.
Comment from Allieas
This was a beautiful poem, and I also liked the art that accompanied it. There were a few moments where the sentences didn't flow super well though, and I felt like I was missing a word or two
one part that tripped me up a little bit:
I, a lone rider new day in night searches, rode horse running deposits,
- should it be rode *a* horse? I read the line a couple of times and was a little confused.
Otherwise, it's an imagery-infused poem, which I thin is lovely. Happy writing!
reply by the author on 10-Apr-2020
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This was a beautiful poem, and I also liked the art that accompanied it. There were a few moments where the sentences didn't flow super well though, and I felt like I was missing a word or two
one part that tripped me up a little bit:
I, a lone rider new day in night searches, rode horse running deposits,
- should it be rode *a* horse? I read the line a couple of times and was a little confused.
Otherwise, it's an imagery-infused poem, which I thin is lovely. Happy writing!
Comment Written 09-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 10-Apr-2020
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This is the major flaws in my writes, improving these aspects through reviews and comments as yours, thanking you for your generous rate dispute flaws and welcomed comments.
Comment from Gitasong49
I found this extremely difficult to make sense out of. The images are great, but the topic seems to change after the third verse. You start out talking about the difficulties of writing. Then, you change to overcoming, or conquering evil. I would suggest breaking this into two poems and concentrating on one topic for each poem. That will strengthen your writing.
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2016
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I found this extremely difficult to make sense out of. The images are great, but the topic seems to change after the third verse. You start out talking about the difficulties of writing. Then, you change to overcoming, or conquering evil. I would suggest breaking this into two poems and concentrating on one topic for each poem. That will strengthen your writing.
Comment Written 14-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 15-Nov-2016
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Super asvise and a step in advancing my writes. Thanking you for generous rate and welcomed thoughts.
Comment from Moon baby
Your style is unique. The analogies quite remarkable. Your work makes me think, so I may better understand. Each line has it's own story to tell. A truth spoken in your words. Thank you for how you write and create.
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2016
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Your style is unique. The analogies quite remarkable. Your work makes me think, so I may better understand. Each line has it's own story to tell. A truth spoken in your words. Thank you for how you write and create.
Comment Written 14-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2016
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My writes are flawed with pits of grammar, yet pleased you found interest in this write. Thanking you for generous rate and welcomed thoughts.
Comment from BruceMiller
It is obvious to me that English is not your native language. If it is, then you have an even greater problem than I thought. I made my assumption because I'm puzzled by many of your phrasings, and in the final analysis, I just don't understand what you are try to convey. Maybe the problem is mine. Cheers.
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2016
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It is obvious to me that English is not your native language. If it is, then you have an even greater problem than I thought. I made my assumption because I'm puzzled by many of your phrasings, and in the final analysis, I just don't understand what you are try to convey. Maybe the problem is mine. Cheers.
Comment Written 02-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2016
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Thanking you for your welcomed comment and generous rate. I do have expression pits.
Comment from rydere
This poem is good and the picture is too. It was so much to read and the rhythm if there one. But overall I like it, so can you tell me this: What does this mean? "Life refreshing to my truck is stream, waters a constant -fights my doubts, flow place new views: they showing my victories or my failures.
I to be watered by nature's hands, fed milk as a child by fertile ground myself rooted: I in my body structure filled in trunk with treasures." Because it gave me a tiny bit trouble trying to think about what was it all about? So can you tell me please, I thought it was about seasons, food, a women body but now I was wrong can you just tell me, and keep up with the great work.
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2016
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This poem is good and the picture is too. It was so much to read and the rhythm if there one. But overall I like it, so can you tell me this: What does this mean? "Life refreshing to my truck is stream, waters a constant -fights my doubts, flow place new views: they showing my victories or my failures.
I to be watered by nature's hands, fed milk as a child by fertile ground myself rooted: I in my body structure filled in trunk with treasures." Because it gave me a tiny bit trouble trying to think about what was it all about? So can you tell me please, I thought it was about seasons, food, a women body but now I was wrong can you just tell me, and keep up with the great work.
Comment Written 02-Apr-2016
reply by the author on 04-Apr-2016
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Simple imagining, me as an actual tree with detailed aspect. Thanking you for generous rate and captivating comments.
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You are welcome.
Comment from Wabigoon
TPAC
You have a thing, yes a way of fighting or describing your fighting that is original. Maybe you should go father into it like eecummings without punctuation at all because that's what's here, pal, and the first thing I shoot is that falseness or trying to maintain your connection to the old world of correctness.
I like a lot of this all the writing and river imagery flowing into how it is you battle and the tree being family and there being sides worth standing for
I think you have improved or maybe devolved back toward some primordial use of lingo where it is communication and weapon
I like that but am not going to say more and on it but don't think you have your mojo yet get it
Best
Wabigoon/jeff
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2016
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TPAC
You have a thing, yes a way of fighting or describing your fighting that is original. Maybe you should go father into it like eecummings without punctuation at all because that's what's here, pal, and the first thing I shoot is that falseness or trying to maintain your connection to the old world of correctness.
I like a lot of this all the writing and river imagery flowing into how it is you battle and the tree being family and there being sides worth standing for
I think you have improved or maybe devolved back toward some primordial use of lingo where it is communication and weapon
I like that but am not going to say more and on it but don't think you have your mojo yet get it
Best
Wabigoon/jeff
Comment Written 28-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2016
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Appreciate the sound shout, works has pits and are under revisions. Thanking you for generous rate and captivating statements about this write.
