The Conjurer, Part Two
Fata Morgana39 total reviews
Comment from Cumbrianlass
Oh, my goodness, I wish had a six. Or better yet, a ten. I think this is some of your strongest writing yet, Bev. Immersed? Er, yeah! Everything around me just vanished as I read. Superb writing - mature, natural, with a delicious smattering of the other-wordly, and you know I share your love of that stuff! Cannot wait to read more of this!
Despite the finger of fear prodding my ribcage - love that.
The twin ogres of heat and drought - love that too!
During a career in the Foreign Service, he'd spent time in Great Britain and, thereafter, refused to refrigerate his beer. - I'm sorry to hear that. LOL!
corrosive bile - brilliant how you add one word (corrosive) to accentuate the subject.
It was the coward's way out, but I simply had to put as much distance as possible between us. - I would do exactly this to avoid confrontation.
It fell to my old friend logic to explain what was happening as possibly being the collision of heat and pavement causing the unusual visual phenomenon known as Fata Morgana. - Oh, I have seen this! My dad too. He was in Palestine on National Service, and he told me about the desert looking like an ocean.
"Do not waste this opportunity, Doctor Morales. The wind has invited you into her world--a rare and beautiful omen. She will teach you the fate of man is to transcend death by embracing it." - got goose bumps reading this paragraph.
Bravo, my friend. I'm so proud of you. This is truly exceptional writing.
xx
Av
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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Oh, my goodness, I wish had a six. Or better yet, a ten. I think this is some of your strongest writing yet, Bev. Immersed? Er, yeah! Everything around me just vanished as I read. Superb writing - mature, natural, with a delicious smattering of the other-wordly, and you know I share your love of that stuff! Cannot wait to read more of this!
Despite the finger of fear prodding my ribcage - love that.
The twin ogres of heat and drought - love that too!
During a career in the Foreign Service, he'd spent time in Great Britain and, thereafter, refused to refrigerate his beer. - I'm sorry to hear that. LOL!
corrosive bile - brilliant how you add one word (corrosive) to accentuate the subject.
It was the coward's way out, but I simply had to put as much distance as possible between us. - I would do exactly this to avoid confrontation.
It fell to my old friend logic to explain what was happening as possibly being the collision of heat and pavement causing the unusual visual phenomenon known as Fata Morgana. - Oh, I have seen this! My dad too. He was in Palestine on National Service, and he told me about the desert looking like an ocean.
"Do not waste this opportunity, Doctor Morales. The wind has invited you into her world--a rare and beautiful omen. She will teach you the fate of man is to transcend death by embracing it." - got goose bumps reading this paragraph.
Bravo, my friend. I'm so proud of you. This is truly exceptional writing.
xx
Av
Comment Written 02-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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Hi, Av. I'm over the moon with this grand review. Thank you so very much for your very kind and generous support for my story. It's always great when a reader/reviewer has a similar interest in the paranormal edge of spirituality. Knowing you liked the story means a lot to me, my friend, given my admiration for your superb talents.
Doctor Morales will re-group in the next chapter, little realizing he's already caught in the web of the shaman. I've got plans for that guy. Ha!
I appreciate you highlighting the sections you liked, and for the wish of a six. Truly, no extra star could possibly mean more to me than your encouragement, Av.
Have a great weekend...
XX Bev
Comment from boxergirl
Wow...Bev....this is great writing...sorry i have no six to honor it. I was engaged from the beginning and your descriptive details provided strong imagery throughout. You are excellent at setting an eerie tone that makes me hold my breath when reading.
Looking forward to more.
Karen 8-)
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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Wow...Bev....this is great writing...sorry i have no six to honor it. I was engaged from the beginning and your descriptive details provided strong imagery throughout. You are excellent at setting an eerie tone that makes me hold my breath when reading.
Looking forward to more.
Karen 8-)
Comment Written 02-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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Hi, Karen. Thank you so much for your very kind and generous review. I appreciate you reading my story and your encouragement for Doctor Morales' journey into the unknown. I'm glad you found the story-line eerie because that's what I was aiming for.
Doctor Morales will re-group a bit in part three, only to find himself pulled further into the shaman's world. Poor man LoL.
:) Bev
Comment from Adri7enne
You create a bit of magic with this, Bev. I felt I was in suspended animation for a spell. If your name wasn't on it, I would have sworn it wasn't something you had written. It's so gritty! I think you've pushed back some boundaries. It's atmospheric. Brilliant, Bev! Wish I had saved a six!
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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You create a bit of magic with this, Bev. I felt I was in suspended animation for a spell. If your name wasn't on it, I would have sworn it wasn't something you had written. It's so gritty! I think you've pushed back some boundaries. It's atmospheric. Brilliant, Bev! Wish I had saved a six!
Comment Written 02-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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I'm tickled by your review, Adrienne. I love that you think I've pushed back boundaries because I was really starting to feel like a fifteen-month pregnant woman unable to deliver the baby. This story goes back years in terms of my own experiences and, at one time, I would not have been able to even discuss its repercussions. Though some of this is purely fictional, there's a fair amount of my own experiences sprinkled throughout. I was naive when I first entered this worldview--and found myself properly humbled... as will Doctor Morales.
Comment from JW
This chapter is well-written and easy holds a reader's attention. With your excellent use of description, you can easily picture the scene before them.
One can only wonder what is going to happen once he arrives at the Shaman's home.
Thanks for sharing this, Bev. JW
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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This chapter is well-written and easy holds a reader's attention. With your excellent use of description, you can easily picture the scene before them.
One can only wonder what is going to happen once he arrives at the Shaman's home.
Thanks for sharing this, Bev. JW
Comment Written 02-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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Thanks so much for kind and generous review, JW. I appreciate you reading!
Have a great weekend...
Bev
Comment from chasennov
Fata Morgana.The Conjurer, Part Two.' This is a great piece of work you have created here, Bev. I'm wondering what Dr. Morales is going to gain from these men regarding his book on altered states of consciousness. Very well done. Kind regards. Chasennov.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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Fata Morgana.The Conjurer, Part Two.' This is a great piece of work you have created here, Bev. I'm wondering what Dr. Morales is going to gain from these men regarding his book on altered states of consciousness. Very well done. Kind regards. Chasennov.
Comment Written 02-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2015
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Thank you so much, C. I appreciate your kind and encouraging review.
What he will gain depends much on what he is willing to release. In the wide spectrum of studies and works on the shamanic arts, the initiate inevitably goes through a purification process. Old ideas must give way to a willingness to see life differently. A man like Stephano has it all figured out, or so he thinks. This whole trip may be a waste of time or a new beginning. It's his choice.
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You are always most welcome, Bev.
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:)
Comment from judiverse
Great description of the tree, and it works beautifully as a lead-in to his memory of an incident with his father when he was a student fifteen years ago. He asks his father about the trees, and his father says he had them removed because that saved him the work of raking them. He's shocked by his father's attitude, and it has a lasting impression. It's interesting you mentioned the scent of sage. I recently watched an episode of "Criminal Minds," and the victims always smelled sage before the monstrous villain had them do his killing for him. Morales is in quite a state before Pasquale shows up. Pasquale is amused that Morales, a professor, would want to obtain information from a shaman on altered states of consciousness. Interesting references to the wind, and we will see how that plays out as Morales goes with Pasquale. Great story. judi
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2015
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Great description of the tree, and it works beautifully as a lead-in to his memory of an incident with his father when he was a student fifteen years ago. He asks his father about the trees, and his father says he had them removed because that saved him the work of raking them. He's shocked by his father's attitude, and it has a lasting impression. It's interesting you mentioned the scent of sage. I recently watched an episode of "Criminal Minds," and the victims always smelled sage before the monstrous villain had them do his killing for him. Morales is in quite a state before Pasquale shows up. Pasquale is amused that Morales, a professor, would want to obtain information from a shaman on altered states of consciousness. Interesting references to the wind, and we will see how that plays out as Morales goes with Pasquale. Great story. judi
Comment Written 01-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2015
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Thanks for the excellent review and for sharing your insights, Judi. Doctor Morales is playing with fire!
:)
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You're very welcome. I was intrigued with your use of the wind and the tree. Will be curious to see how that plays into the story. judi
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You might say that the wind is going to be another 'character' in this drama, Judi. I have always loved the wind, and I feel it has an amazing energy for those who pay attention. Obviously, too, it has great power over the destiny of humankind as well.
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You're welcome. Great story in the works. judi
Comment from Donna G. (aka Sam Duck)
I read your first installment as a non-paying member, and was disappointed that I could not comment. I love your manner of writing - it seems like you are a professional author - everything flows so well, and I am drawn into the story and become invested in it, even though I'm not sure what exactly is happening. It is well written and has a complex plot and characters. Excellent job!
I look forward to your next chapter!
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2015
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I read your first installment as a non-paying member, and was disappointed that I could not comment. I love your manner of writing - it seems like you are a professional author - everything flows so well, and I am drawn into the story and become invested in it, even though I'm not sure what exactly is happening. It is well written and has a complex plot and characters. Excellent job!
I look forward to your next chapter!
Comment Written 01-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2015
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Hi, Sam. Thank you much for this really grand review! As a writer, it's really good to know what works for a reader, and you've been most generous with your supportive insights. I appreciate your interest in the story... there's quite a bit more to come which I hope you will enjoy as well.
:) Bev
Comment from c_lucas
A master of trickery masters various items to enhance his devious transactions. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read.
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2015
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A master of trickery masters various items to enhance his devious transactions. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read.
Comment Written 01-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2015
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Thanks so much, Charlie. :) Bevc
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You're welcome, Bev. Charlie
Comment from Joy Graham
Hi Bev! Nice to read a new story from you. I love these characters. They are easy to like and follow. I think you're setting up the mystery your readers will follow anxiously.
I'm on meds for a tooth ache awaiting dental surgery. I may be needing to re-read this when I'm back to normal lol!
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2015
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Hi Bev! Nice to read a new story from you. I love these characters. They are easy to like and follow. I think you're setting up the mystery your readers will follow anxiously.
I'm on meds for a tooth ache awaiting dental surgery. I may be needing to re-read this when I'm back to normal lol!
Comment Written 01-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2015
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Hi, Joy. Thanks for reading during this difficult time. Hope your feeling better soon!
I much appreciate your great review, my friend. Always good to hear from you.
Hugs, Bev
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
What a chapter, Bev - I've always enjoyed your work,
but this is extra exceptional and I don't have a
darn six. So descriptive, I felt myself there - mesmerised.
It's quite eerie in places.
Doctor Morales isn't the only one who was amazed.
The meeting went (on)longer than expected."
What are we but poor folk[s] - folk
Margaret
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2015
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What a chapter, Bev - I've always enjoyed your work,
but this is extra exceptional and I don't have a
darn six. So descriptive, I felt myself there - mesmerised.
It's quite eerie in places.
Doctor Morales isn't the only one who was amazed.
The meeting went (on)longer than expected."
What are we but poor folk[s] - folk
Margaret
Comment Written 01-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2015
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Hi, Margaret. Thank you so much for this most encouraging and gracious review. I've spent a couple of decades studying the world of the shaman, so I'm glad I'm able to give a sense of that realm to my readers. Your words mean a lot to me, Margaret, especially from a writer I totally admire.
Thanks, too, for the suggestions for tidying up the narrative!
:) Bev
