Leonard Cohen
Poet Acrostic79 total reviews
Comment from Dawn Munro
I missed seeing this contest, but now that I have read your entry, it's probably just as well because this is a fabulous poem, IMHO would have been hard to beat! Brought me to tears. Worthy of a six, if I had one.
********************OUTSTANDING!*********************
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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I missed seeing this contest, but now that I have read your entry, it's probably just as well because this is a fabulous poem, IMHO would have been hard to beat! Brought me to tears. Worthy of a six, if I had one.
********************OUTSTANDING!*********************
Comment Written 12-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Thank you
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You are welcome.
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You are welcome.
Comment from Sanku
A great poem paying tribute to a brilliant singer.the acrostic has come out very well ,each line speaking about the beauty and essence of his songs.
all the best for the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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A great poem paying tribute to a brilliant singer.the acrostic has come out very well ,each line speaking about the beauty and essence of his songs.
all the best for the contest.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Thank you
Comment from trishstreasures&more
Very moving! What a tribute to someone who meant so much to so many. It was eloquently written. Not too much nor too little. I love the form. Nice Job!
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Very moving! What a tribute to someone who meant so much to so many. It was eloquently written. Not too much nor too little. I love the form. Nice Job!
Comment Written 12-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review my work. I am humbled and honored by the six.
Comment from Kelly2
Thank you for such a wonderful tribute to a very unique, provocative, and memorable man.
I don't know a lot about him, but he was very eclectic, unusual, somewhat controversial at times and brought some joy to this world.
He died the day before election day and I can't help but wonder if God wasn't saving him from a future none of us can foresee, but one which he did not deserve in his journey of peace.
Kelly
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Thank you for such a wonderful tribute to a very unique, provocative, and memorable man.
I don't know a lot about him, but he was very eclectic, unusual, somewhat controversial at times and brought some joy to this world.
He died the day before election day and I can't help but wonder if God wasn't saving him from a future none of us can foresee, but one which he did not deserve in his journey of peace.
Kelly
Comment Written 12-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Thank you
Comment from joeruptak
I don't know how well you will do in the competition but
you do have my vote
the rhyme, rhythm and flow are terrific this is a smooth and
easy read the only thing I didn't like about it is it made
me have a ting of jealousy. Good job
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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I don't know how well you will do in the competition but
you do have my vote
the rhyme, rhythm and flow are terrific this is a smooth and
easy read the only thing I didn't like about it is it made
me have a ting of jealousy. Good job
Comment Written 12-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review my work. I am humbled and honored by the six.
Comment from Sis Cat
This is a fine acrostic tribute to the late, great Leonard Cohen. I was at a poetry event Thursday night when we stopped the show to announce he had died. Then we played a song. Your words are well rhymed and deeply felt, including many beautiful phrases:
"Our prophet and guru grand master of words,
H(e)arkens The Future when blue hummingbirds,"
Hearkens needs an E.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful tribute. I wish you contest success.
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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This is a fine acrostic tribute to the late, great Leonard Cohen. I was at a poetry event Thursday night when we stopped the show to announce he had died. Then we played a song. Your words are well rhymed and deeply felt, including many beautiful phrases:
"Our prophet and guru grand master of words,
H(e)arkens The Future when blue hummingbirds,"
Hearkens needs an E.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful tribute. I wish you contest success.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Thank you
Comment from rama devi
I love that song--my favorite of his. RIP to a great poetic voice.
You might enjoy this poignant rendition of that song:
https://youtu.be/vIw0ewEsNHs
What a fine tribute--eloquent and well rhymed. It has a great musical feel except for your choice to use non-grammatical commas where there should be smooth enjambment between lines. That is the reason I considered giving a four star rating, as I found it jarring. However, the overall poem aside from spag would be a certain SIX so I am giving five stars. Hope you fix the spag, though!
NOTES:
Your name is new to me, so may I extend a warm welcome to the FS family?
Love your first alliterated line--flows fluidly and drew me right in. Very fine rhymes and flow in general.
Love this, as it's true and it is also something I value and aim for (universal applicability):
Each of his songs--universal in scope,
This line made me stumble a bit due to awkward grammar:
Overwhelm like silence during the war,
Nursing the Unified Hearts of the poor.
Since the subject is 'each' of his songs, overwhelm needs an S or an ING, and I recommend a comma:
Overwhelms, like silence during the war,
Nursing the Unified Hearts of the poor.
or, if using ING, you could trim the THE to make room for the extra syllable:
Overwhelming, like silence during war,
Nursing the Unified Hearts of the poor.
Great rhyme pair here (note a spag suggestion too)e
Asking for hands to hold on to, and thus,(no ,)
Recruiting the Beautiful Losers like us.
I like your use of caps on Beautiful Losers and the ironic phrasing as well.
Since this starts a new sentence, I suggest not beginning with a gerund but rather an active verb (optional idea):
And he asks for hands to hold on to, thus
Recruits the Beautiful Losers like us.
Please read both ways aloud to decide. :)
*
Despite all its flaws, his nicotine voice,(NO COMMA)
Calls forth the forsaken to weep and rejoice. - OUTSTANDING LINE!
*
Our prophet and guru(,) grand master of words,
Harkens The Future when blue hummingbirds,(NO COMMA)
Extol the virtues of kinship and calm,
Nascently singing that Hallelujah psalm.
Love the closing note. Not sure about caps on The Future. Found that distracting, honestly. Suggest, with above edits:
Our prophet and guru, grand master of words,
Harkens the future when blue hummingbirds
Extol the virtues of kinship and calm,
Nascently singing that Hallelujah psalm.
Good job on making the acrostic not sound forced.
Enjoyed this. Looking forward to reading more from you.
Warmly, rd
PS--I also recommend not capping every line--but that is a matter of taste and style, of course. IN a poem with so much enjambment, using proper caps like a sentence helps the reader grok the form without having to think about it--thus enabling fuller absorption into the substance...
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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I love that song--my favorite of his. RIP to a great poetic voice.
You might enjoy this poignant rendition of that song:
https://youtu.be/vIw0ewEsNHs
What a fine tribute--eloquent and well rhymed. It has a great musical feel except for your choice to use non-grammatical commas where there should be smooth enjambment between lines. That is the reason I considered giving a four star rating, as I found it jarring. However, the overall poem aside from spag would be a certain SIX so I am giving five stars. Hope you fix the spag, though!
NOTES:
Your name is new to me, so may I extend a warm welcome to the FS family?
Love your first alliterated line--flows fluidly and drew me right in. Very fine rhymes and flow in general.
Love this, as it's true and it is also something I value and aim for (universal applicability):
Each of his songs--universal in scope,
This line made me stumble a bit due to awkward grammar:
Overwhelm like silence during the war,
Nursing the Unified Hearts of the poor.
Since the subject is 'each' of his songs, overwhelm needs an S or an ING, and I recommend a comma:
Overwhelms, like silence during the war,
Nursing the Unified Hearts of the poor.
or, if using ING, you could trim the THE to make room for the extra syllable:
Overwhelming, like silence during war,
Nursing the Unified Hearts of the poor.
Great rhyme pair here (note a spag suggestion too)e
Asking for hands to hold on to, and thus,(no ,)
Recruiting the Beautiful Losers like us.
I like your use of caps on Beautiful Losers and the ironic phrasing as well.
Since this starts a new sentence, I suggest not beginning with a gerund but rather an active verb (optional idea):
And he asks for hands to hold on to, thus
Recruits the Beautiful Losers like us.
Please read both ways aloud to decide. :)
*
Despite all its flaws, his nicotine voice,(NO COMMA)
Calls forth the forsaken to weep and rejoice. - OUTSTANDING LINE!
*
Our prophet and guru(,) grand master of words,
Harkens The Future when blue hummingbirds,(NO COMMA)
Extol the virtues of kinship and calm,
Nascently singing that Hallelujah psalm.
Love the closing note. Not sure about caps on The Future. Found that distracting, honestly. Suggest, with above edits:
Our prophet and guru, grand master of words,
Harkens the future when blue hummingbirds
Extol the virtues of kinship and calm,
Nascently singing that Hallelujah psalm.
Good job on making the acrostic not sound forced.
Enjoyed this. Looking forward to reading more from you.
Warmly, rd
PS--I also recommend not capping every line--but that is a matter of taste and style, of course. IN a poem with so much enjambment, using proper caps like a sentence helps the reader grok the form without having to think about it--thus enabling fuller absorption into the substance...
Comment Written 12-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
-
Thank you
Comment from judester
This is a beautiful tribute to Montreal's famous bard. I grew up with his music, the gritty, honest glimpses of life that he put to music in his unique and coffee house style. I like your line, "recruiting the beautiful losers like us." Bravo. Cheers, judester
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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This is a beautiful tribute to Montreal's famous bard. I grew up with his music, the gritty, honest glimpses of life that he put to music in his unique and coffee house style. I like your line, "recruiting the beautiful losers like us." Bravo. Cheers, judester
Comment Written 12-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Thank you. I am humbled and honored by the six
Comment from RoostyNester
Although I'm not familiar with Leonard Cohen, your words give much insight into who he was. A great man of words. Your poem was very well done in style and verse. Flowed with grace and meaningful words. Well done.
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Although I'm not familiar with Leonard Cohen, your words give much insight into who he was. A great man of words. Your poem was very well done in style and verse. Flowed with grace and meaningful words. Well done.
Comment Written 11-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Thank you
Comment from Nika2016
So are you psychic? You posted this right before his death?
A beautiful tribute to a man I listened to for years...sometimes he could really put you in a melancholy blue funk though...
Very nice.
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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So are you psychic? You posted this right before his death?
A beautiful tribute to a man I listened to for years...sometimes he could really put you in a melancholy blue funk though...
Very nice.
Comment Written 11-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2016
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Thank you
