Glory Train
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Eden Encounter"Do you really have to earn your wings?
13 total reviews
Comment from Muffins
The character is written with a clear, pure child's reaction. Ryan is force of instinct and in the moment choices.
The Maker's personality and decision not to interfere with Ryan's journey on the Glory Train represents the true meaning of spiritual guidance. The Maker Offers a better way ,but without force. Free will and the hope that Ryan receives the gift presented is what God does. He loves us and tries to guide us on the right path, but it's up to us to travel it. Right now, Ryan is us when we are confused, scare and afraid to trust. I hope all works out in the end for Ryan.
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2015
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The character is written with a clear, pure child's reaction. Ryan is force of instinct and in the moment choices.
The Maker's personality and decision not to interfere with Ryan's journey on the Glory Train represents the true meaning of spiritual guidance. The Maker Offers a better way ,but without force. Free will and the hope that Ryan receives the gift presented is what God does. He loves us and tries to guide us on the right path, but it's up to us to travel it. Right now, Ryan is us when we are confused, scare and afraid to trust. I hope all works out in the end for Ryan.
Comment Written 14-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2015
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Glad you enjoyed this chapter of Glory Train. Ryan has a long trip ahead of him before he even returns to Paradise...if he ever does.
Comment from papa55mike
That is wonderfully written. I love how you describe the settings. I noticed the subtle change change in the language. It gives the story a different feel. Dude, are you busy or what. When do you sleep. Have a great week and always, God bless, mike.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2015
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That is wonderfully written. I love how you describe the settings. I noticed the subtle change change in the language. It gives the story a different feel. Dude, are you busy or what. When do you sleep. Have a great week and always, God bless, mike.
Comment Written 02-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2015
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Sleep? Can you define that concept for me? Glad you enjoyed this little tale. Much more to follow, so stay tuned.
Comment from Nosha17
I guess, Ryan is a confused boy who feels he's been rejected. I am sure he will be well looked after by the Guardian. Well written story, good dialogue and characters. Faye
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2015
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I guess, Ryan is a confused boy who feels he's been rejected. I am sure he will be well looked after by the Guardian. Well written story, good dialogue and characters. Faye
Comment Written 30-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2015
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Ryan has a long way to go before he is returned to Paradise...if he ever is. Glad you enjoyed this story. Your comments and support always welcome.
Comment from flylikeaneagle
Boys will be boys and he doesn't trust these stranger danger angels who are trying to help. He is hurt and runs back onto the train. His dad killed him in the last story - why? I had to read that one second to connect to the story. Yes, go for a book, why not? I like the idea of reaching out to people about spiritual ideas of Heaven. Great story, Brett. Congrats on a great winning streak. I have been here about 15 month. Still learning. I'll check out more of your site, maybe have a campfire and tell stories with the guys. flylikeaneagle
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2015
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Boys will be boys and he doesn't trust these stranger danger angels who are trying to help. He is hurt and runs back onto the train. His dad killed him in the last story - why? I had to read that one second to connect to the story. Yes, go for a book, why not? I like the idea of reaching out to people about spiritual ideas of Heaven. Great story, Brett. Congrats on a great winning streak. I have been here about 15 month. Still learning. I'll check out more of your site, maybe have a campfire and tell stories with the guys. flylikeaneagle
Comment Written 29-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2015
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In Chapter 3 Ryan's Birth it is detailed he was abused his whole life because his father blamed him for the death of his mother when he was born. Ryan was hated by his father. Glad you enjoyed this. Stay tuned. Much more to come.
Comment from Chrissy710
Your story is getting interesting Brett, I am quite intrigued to see where Ryan will end up next. Just enough in each chapter to keep us reading Good work Cheers Christine
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2015
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Your story is getting interesting Brett, I am quite intrigued to see where Ryan will end up next. Just enough in each chapter to keep us reading Good work Cheers Christine
Comment Written 29-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2015
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Glad you are enjoying and following along. Little Ryan still has a long way to go before he gets back to Paradise...if he ever does. So, stay tuned.
Comment from Walu Feral
G'day Brett. This is another very interesting chapter mate. You have a very good imagination my friend and you have once again shown it here. I imagine David turning up would have frightened Ryan badly, but at least he stopped him eating the forbidden fruit. Great job. Cheers Fez
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2015
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G'day Brett. This is another very interesting chapter mate. You have a very good imagination my friend and you have once again shown it here. I imagine David turning up would have frightened Ryan badly, but at least he stopped him eating the forbidden fruit. Great job. Cheers Fez
Comment Written 29-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2015
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David could take solace in that achievement. Glad you enjoyed this. Stay tuned. Much more to come.
Comment from MizKat
Hi Brett,
I really enjoyed this chapter that goes with your book, Glory Train. You sure have a way of writing that grabs hold of the readers and makes them want to find out what's going to happen next. I can see why Ryan is afraid to listen to the guardian since his father was a terrible man and the Gate Opener made the wrong decision for him.
Kat
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2015
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Hi Brett,
I really enjoyed this chapter that goes with your book, Glory Train. You sure have a way of writing that grabs hold of the readers and makes them want to find out what's going to happen next. I can see why Ryan is afraid to listen to the guardian since his father was a terrible man and the Gate Opener made the wrong decision for him.
Kat
Comment Written 27-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2015
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Thanks for your comments and support. But will Ryan's decision come back to haunt him? Stay tuned. Much more to come.
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You're doing a great job in writing Glory Train and I always wait for the next part of it.
Comment from Lesley Collier
An intriguing story of a boy named Ryan who ends up in the Gardens of Eden by mistake and revels in its glory until he becomes hungry and attempts to eat from the forbidden tree of good and evil when a Guardian Angel, David, appears to him and tells him of the mistake of being turned away from the Pearly Gates of Heaven. However, Ryan doesn't believe him and jumps aboard the Glory Train for another destination leaving the Angel bereft but he is reassured by others that he has still not failed at his mission as they will pursue Ryan to other places until his mission is completed and Ryan returns to his rightful place in Heaven. Well written and very imaginative!
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2015
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An intriguing story of a boy named Ryan who ends up in the Gardens of Eden by mistake and revels in its glory until he becomes hungry and attempts to eat from the forbidden tree of good and evil when a Guardian Angel, David, appears to him and tells him of the mistake of being turned away from the Pearly Gates of Heaven. However, Ryan doesn't believe him and jumps aboard the Glory Train for another destination leaving the Angel bereft but he is reassured by others that he has still not failed at his mission as they will pursue Ryan to other places until his mission is completed and Ryan returns to his rightful place in Heaven. Well written and very imaginative!
Comment Written 27-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2015
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Glad you enjoyed this one. Appreciate your comments, support, and summary of my story so far. Stay tuned, much more t come.
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Interresting and intriguing.
A change in plans and now will be different than what I thought would end this.
Nicely written and entertaining to read.
No problems noted
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Interresting and intriguing.
A change in plans and now will be different than what I thought would end this.
Nicely written and entertaining to read.
No problems noted
Comment Written 26-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Interested in knowing how you thought this would end. Ryan still has a lot to go through.
Comment from Serendipity!
Guardian suddenly replied, telling the boy. (Not sure why you put in the word suddenly. Would 'quickly' work just as well?
When the boy screams "I don't believe you," I'd like to see some kind of hint that it was a reaction caused by the terrible brutalities he endured.
"That is all we can do," the angel -told him,- (agreed?)
I am eager to find out where the guardians go next.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Guardian suddenly replied, telling the boy. (Not sure why you put in the word suddenly. Would 'quickly' work just as well?
When the boy screams "I don't believe you," I'd like to see some kind of hint that it was a reaction caused by the terrible brutalities he endured.
"That is all we can do," the angel -told him,- (agreed?)
I am eager to find out where the guardians go next.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2015
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Glad you are enjoying this little story of mine. Stay tuned. Much more to come.
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Yup, I'll stay tuned. It is unique.
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Yup, I'll stay tuned. It is unique.
