Things That Slither
A short story about my worst phobia, snakes and worms34 total reviews
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
A short story about my worst phobia, snakes and worms
~Things That Slither~
by prettybluebirds
You don't like snakes or anything that slithers. Your fear keeps you from enjoying fishing and the outdoors, which is hard because you live on a farm.
The fear comes from a traumatizing experience as a child and as an adult. It is no wonder you have a phobia, you had some really horrible experiences with snakes and critters.
Well done! It is not wonder to me that your story is so well received.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
A short story about my worst phobia, snakes and worms
~Things That Slither~
by prettybluebirds
You don't like snakes or anything that slithers. Your fear keeps you from enjoying fishing and the outdoors, which is hard because you live on a farm.
The fear comes from a traumatizing experience as a child and as an adult. It is no wonder you have a phobia, you had some really horrible experiences with snakes and critters.
Well done! It is not wonder to me that your story is so well received.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thank you. I think the snake in the face was what turned mo off on snakes. I don't know why I don't like worms. I have tried to overcome my aversion to them, but was never able to. Thanks for your kind review.
Comment from BeasPeas
I certainly share your phobia with you. I don't know where you live, but blue racers sound pretty scary. Rattlers were prevalent when I lived in the California mountains and residents always had to be on the lookout for them. More than once I had a rattler in my yard. Scary stuff. I enjoyed reading your story about these creepy crawlers. Marilyn/BeasPeas
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
I certainly share your phobia with you. I don't know where you live, but blue racers sound pretty scary. Rattlers were prevalent when I lived in the California mountains and residents always had to be on the lookout for them. More than once I had a rattler in my yard. Scary stuff. I enjoyed reading your story about these creepy crawlers. Marilyn/BeasPeas
Comment Written 07-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thank you for the review. Blue racers are not poisonous but they do tend to be aggressive. We have rattle snakes in Michigan too, but they are smaller then you rattlers and you don't see them to often.
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I'm right next door in central Wisconsin. I'm like you, I don't like any slithering thing whether poisonous or not.
Comment from Pantygynt
I found this quite captivating and couldn't help thinking all the way through that perhaps you should emigrate back to Ireland where snakes are unknown. St Patrich is supposed to have banished them from "the holy ground".
I was brought up to believe that snakes ere usually more frightened of humans than the humans are of the snakes, whiseems to mean that they must be pretty terrified most of the time. Recently however I have learnt that there certain varieties that will attack and chase humans. So I have no reason to doubt your story.
I could find no Spag but I thought perhaps that some of your paragraphs could be merged. At times it seems a little fragmented. Perhaps at one time your were told to write shorter ones and maybe your pendulum has swung over a bit far.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
I found this quite captivating and couldn't help thinking all the way through that perhaps you should emigrate back to Ireland where snakes are unknown. St Patrich is supposed to have banished them from "the holy ground".
I was brought up to believe that snakes ere usually more frightened of humans than the humans are of the snakes, whiseems to mean that they must be pretty terrified most of the time. Recently however I have learnt that there certain varieties that will attack and chase humans. So I have no reason to doubt your story.
I could find no Spag but I thought perhaps that some of your paragraphs could be merged. At times it seems a little fragmented. Perhaps at one time your were told to write shorter ones and maybe your pendulum has swung over a bit far.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015
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Thank You. Yes, one of the reviewers did tell me to do more paragraphs and perhaps I am overdoing it now. Thanks for the tip, I am always grateful for suggestions or help of any kind.
Comment from mfowler
In my country, Australia, poisonous snakes are part of the territory and I've had my share of run-ins with them. So, like you, I am a little afraid of them, and with good reason. But, you, as you've shared seem to really make them mad. I was sitting on the edge of my chair as I read about the baby rabbits and the chasing snake. That really gave me the creeps. I thought snakes were supposed to be afraid of us; not your blue racers. I would move to Ireland if I were you. I've heard St Patrick banished the critters hundreds of years ago. LOL. This was a great story although it creeped me out.
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2015
In my country, Australia, poisonous snakes are part of the territory and I've had my share of run-ins with them. So, like you, I am a little afraid of them, and with good reason. But, you, as you've shared seem to really make them mad. I was sitting on the edge of my chair as I read about the baby rabbits and the chasing snake. That really gave me the creeps. I thought snakes were supposed to be afraid of us; not your blue racers. I would move to Ireland if I were you. I've heard St Patrick banished the critters hundreds of years ago. LOL. This was a great story although it creeped me out.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2015
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Your right, I should move to Ireland. People tell that if didn't run the snakes wouldn't chase me. I don't know, I never stuck around to find out. Thank you for your review.
Comment from sandragee
'...a huge blue racer snake leaped out the cage door and hit me smack in the face before slithering over my shoulder and out the door'. Okay, I just added snakes to my list of phobias because of that line. Oh, the things I learned by reading this piece. I now know that snakes hold grudges, they swim, and dogs are wimps when it comes to snakes. Sorry to laugh at your fears but this is a very funny piece. Well done.
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2015
'...a huge blue racer snake leaped out the cage door and hit me smack in the face before slithering over my shoulder and out the door'. Okay, I just added snakes to my list of phobias because of that line. Oh, the things I learned by reading this piece. I now know that snakes hold grudges, they swim, and dogs are wimps when it comes to snakes. Sorry to laugh at your fears but this is a very funny piece. Well done.
Comment Written 06-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2015
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Thank you, I try to laugh at my fear, it helps. I couldn't sleep for a week after that snake hit me in the face, that was one awful experience. Thanks for your review.
Comment from winespiller
nice commentary on something that freaks us all out, no matter what we might say. I played with garter snakes when I was young, but would run if I saw one today!
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
nice commentary on something that freaks us all out, no matter what we might say. I played with garter snakes when I was young, but would run if I saw one today!
Comment Written 06-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
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Thank you. Glad you liked the story. Those snakes have been the thorn in side forever.
Comment from Lesley Collier
A humorous though serious story about a woman's phobia of snakes, worms and other creepy crawlers. Getting her friend to put the worms on the hooks while fishing and various encounters with snakes who all seem to sense her fear and come after her brings humour to the story though her phobia is nothing to be ashamed and should be taken seriously as many people have this problem. The demise of her rabbits babies eaten by a snake could only have heightened her dislike of them and is very sad indeed. Cats love to play with creepy crawlers to the horror of many owners even though sometimes they feel they are showing their love to you by bringing these horrendous presents. Well written and full of delightful antidote!
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
A humorous though serious story about a woman's phobia of snakes, worms and other creepy crawlers. Getting her friend to put the worms on the hooks while fishing and various encounters with snakes who all seem to sense her fear and come after her brings humour to the story though her phobia is nothing to be ashamed and should be taken seriously as many people have this problem. The demise of her rabbits babies eaten by a snake could only have heightened her dislike of them and is very sad indeed. Cats love to play with creepy crawlers to the horror of many owners even though sometimes they feel they are showing their love to you by bringing these horrendous presents. Well written and full of delightful antidote!
Comment Written 06-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
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Thank you for your kind review. Hugs to you
Comment from jpduck
I thought this was a neat essay which very clearly conveyed your phobias. One thing I found rather puzzling -- you wrote, in adjacent sentences, 'I swore vengeance on them all' followed by 'So I went through the earlier years of my life avoiding snakes whenever it was possible.' There seems to be a contradiction here; I would suggest that you delete one or other of these sentences.
A typo & a SPAG. (Square brackets indicate suggested deletions, and asterisks, suggested insertions):
'we were finding a lot of mushroom*s*'
'It *also*makes it embarrassing [also] *always* to [always] have to ask someone (Moving 'always' is to avoid the split infinitive).
Adrian
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
I thought this was a neat essay which very clearly conveyed your phobias. One thing I found rather puzzling -- you wrote, in adjacent sentences, 'I swore vengeance on them all' followed by 'So I went through the earlier years of my life avoiding snakes whenever it was possible.' There seems to be a contradiction here; I would suggest that you delete one or other of these sentences.
A typo & a SPAG. (Square brackets indicate suggested deletions, and asterisks, suggested insertions):
'we were finding a lot of mushroom*s*'
'It *also*makes it embarrassing [also] *always* to [always] have to ask someone (Moving 'always' is to avoid the split infinitive).
Adrian
Comment Written 06-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
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Thanks for your review. I will eliminate one of the phrases as you suggested. I appreciate any help I can get.
Comment from cflorian8
Although I am sure you were not laughing during those horrific experiences, your tale tickled my funny bone numerous times. I too am not fond of snakes or night crawlers and have experienced my share of frightful encounters with these creatures. While encountering them myself is not fun, I can not help but join your son in laughter. You are a great writer and have earned my praise for your creativity.
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
Although I am sure you were not laughing during those horrific experiences, your tale tickled my funny bone numerous times. I too am not fond of snakes or night crawlers and have experienced my share of frightful encounters with these creatures. While encountering them myself is not fun, I can not help but join your son in laughter. You are a great writer and have earned my praise for your creativity.
Comment Written 06-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
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Thank you very much. No, it wasn't funny at the time, but when I look back it is amusing.
Comment from happykat4
Funny, funny, LOL. This is delightful. I am so sorry about the snakes AND the night crawlers. I am glad you like to fish and you worked the worm thing out with your friend. (I just throw my line in, don't want to catch fish, don't enjoy fishing)
Are you sure you husband didn't have an accident. Ha. Very good, and good luck in the contest. Kat
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
Funny, funny, LOL. This is delightful. I am so sorry about the snakes AND the night crawlers. I am glad you like to fish and you worked the worm thing out with your friend. (I just throw my line in, don't want to catch fish, don't enjoy fishing)
Are you sure you husband didn't have an accident. Ha. Very good, and good luck in the contest. Kat
Comment Written 05-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
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Thank you for your review. I am glad you enjoyed the story.