Comment from alvina224224

Exceptional

Thought provoking and grave, and an excellent lesson for me. I particularly like the brevity and clarity of the haiku form. Congratulations on your awards, Dean - well deserved. Mary

 Comment Written 27-Jul-2015

---

reply by the author on 27-Jul-2015

Thanks so much for digging this one up, so to speak, and having a go ay it, Mary. I too have come to appreciate haiku, along with all of the Japanese forms of short, poetic expressionism. It is much harder to write and do correctly than most people believe.
I'm happy to know you enjoy these forms too, especially mine, LOL. Thanks for the kind comments and very generous rating. I really appreciate it, as always. ~Dean :}

Comment from EricBrady

Excellent

Being a veteran, I had to stop when I saw the photo. This is a beautiful tribute for the men who gave their lives on that horrid day. Few words, but very profound. I can see why this was a winner. Congratulations.

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2015

---

reply by the author on 26-Jul-2015

From one veteran to another ( US Marine Corps, 3rd Marines, Third Battalion, 1979-'87 ) thank you for your service, Eric. I'm very happy you enjoyed the haiku.--Dean

Comment from ameen786

Exceptional

Dean my friend, a brilliant haiku with depth and sarcasm and no wonder it's a winner, congratulations! Would certainly make a great poster on any wall.

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2015

---

reply by the author on 26-Jul-2015

Thank you very much, ameen. I'm really pleased that you enjoyed it, my friend.
I appreciate your complimentary review and six stars. I'm very grateful, as always. ~Dean :}

Comment from kiwisteveh

Excellent

Dean, congratulations on your win! Well deserved with this poignant reminder of those who died fighting in what should have been a beautiful spot. I guess the double meaning in the final line clinched the victory.

Steve

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2015

---

reply by the author on 26-Jul-2015

It must have, Steve.
Thank you very much for reading my entry. I appreciate your feedback.--Dean

Comment from Leineco

Excellent

What a wonderful juxtaposition!

I have to confess - in the fraction of a second between reading the first two lines and the third (and guessing it was yours, based on the artwork) I expected a "watery death". . .Davy Jones, etc type epiphany.

But your final line was truly inspired writing!

Sorry I didn't see this till Saturday - best I can offer is a 5 :-(

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2015

---

reply by the author on 26-Jul-2015

Thank you, Lorraine. I'm very pleased you enjoyed the poem. I appreciate your comments--Dean

Comment from jmdg1954

Excellent

Looks like I'm late to the game once again. Congrats Dean. Well deserved win in the contest. So few words can bring so much meaning to your point.

Sad. But men and women of courage and honor should be held to the highest regard.

Nicely done... John

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2015

---

reply by the author on 25-Jul-2015

Thanks, John, and better late than never, my friend. Except where the voting is concerned. If you're too late for that, well, you, and I, are out of luck especially if I'm trailing in votes, LOL.
Much obliged for your review. ~Dean

Comment from Just2Write

Exceptional

Deadly creepy, and well worthy of my last six of the week.
This Haiku fits the contest requirements gruesomely well. It highlights the horrors of war, and yet is paradoxically a poem advocating peace.
Excellent presentation.
This is the second poem I've found today that was written by someone that I am following where I didn't get a message in my in-bin. :o(
Don't know what happened, but I'm glad you won.
Rose.

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2015

---

reply by the author on 25-Jul-2015

Thanks so much, Rose. I really appreciate your complimentary comments and six stars, my friend. More than that, I'm just really glad you "get it" (many have not), and that you enjoyed my haiku entry.

As for why you weren't notified, it was for a "blind contest"-- the haiku-grave contest-- which ended yesterday. So, unless you cruise the contest booths as I do, you would not have seen it.

Anyhow, thanks so much again. Have a fantastic evening. ~Dean :}

reply by Just2Write on 25-Jul-2015

Aha... the penny drops. I don't cruise the contest booths (at least not lately) Sorry I missed it - but you won anyway, so don't matter. R.

Comment from Dawn Munro

Excellent

Gee whiz, Dean, you sure nailed it with this little gem. It seems I am behind the eight ball yet again...sigh...but at least I didn't miss it altogether - wow. I think this is one of my all-time favorites. Congratulations on a well-earned win.

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2015

---

reply by the author on 25-Jul-2015

What a nice thing to say, Dawn. Alvin T. Ethington (may he rest in peace) must be smiling down on us from above. He helped me win my very first haiku and told me to stick with it--learn the intricacies of short Japanese forms--and just keep trying. So that's what I did, I buckled down, studied everything about haiku, senryu, haibuns and tankas that I could, and I tried, failed, and kept trying...
Thanks for such a great review and compliment, Dawn.
You have made my day. ~Dean :}

reply by Dawn Munro on 25-Jul-2015

Very much my pleasure.

Comment from Sis Cat

Excellent

An evocative poem that made me think of the D-Day Invasion or any invasion involving a beach landing. In a few well-chosen words you imply the battle without showing the bloodshed. I imagine the beach covered in bodies as "few spots remain open." Your satori is quite effective, "men fight to fill them."

Thank you for sharing. I wish you success in the contest.

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2015

---

reply by the author on 25-Jul-2015

Thank you very much, Sis Cat, and I certainly appreciate your excellent assessment. The contest has now ended. If you're curious as to who might have come out on top, I encourage you to go to the contests booth page and check out the past winners. If I simply told you who won, then where would be the fun in that?
Thanks again!
Take care. ~Dean :}

Comment from Rubylou

Excellent

This haiku took me by surprise. Just reading the title I didn't expect to be left with the feeling of deep pausing. (if that makes sense)
Congratulations!
Rubylou

 Comment Written 25-Jul-2015

---

reply by the author on 25-Jul-2015

Yes, it makes perfect sense, Rubylou, which is why it is written the way it is.

The "Ah-ha!" moment ( or satori line ) should work that way in every haiku, I feel. The juxtaposition of contrasting elements is the key to making it work, or fail. Hopefully, this worked for you.

Thanks so much again for your review. ~Dean :)