Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin

Excellent

Hi, Brett...

_ Indeed, losing love can be the worst.
_ Happily, it can turn around and in the end make you a better person for having gone through it.
_ Then 'the one' comes along. (*<*)
_ Excellent repeating poem entry.
_ Good luck in the contest.

Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*:*)

 Comment Written 07-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015

Thanks for your comments and support. Appreciate them very much indeed.

Comment from DR DIP

Excellent

Brett that my Fan story friend is the basis for a good song.
With a bit of tweaking on the phrasing, I am sure someone with a voice and a guitar could lay down a tune to these words. Thanks for sharing

dip

 Comment Written 07-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 08-Aug-2015

This actually is Country music lyrics. I posted them here as a poem. Thanks for your comments. Appreciate them very much.

Comment from Green Lake Girl

Excellent

I enjoyed these Country-Western lyrics, Brett. I plan on checking out your website. Don't know if you ever read any of Velvet Elvis's poetry/lyrics on this site, but he was really talented too.

You do a good job expressing the heartache in these lyrics. "A pain I can't kill with a double shot." I assume a double shot of bourbon!

Well done.

 Comment Written 24-May-2015

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reply by the author on 24-May-2015

A double shot of something along those lines. Will have to check this Velvet Elvis out and see what they are all about. Appreciate your comments and support.

Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose

Excellent

Excellent poem!!
'Now, I am the one that's left behind.
it is enough to make me lose my mind.'
~I love this part of the poem, I have been there and it hurts like hell

-excellent rhythm-followed the contest requirement
-action flows smoothly
-descriptive language used
-excellent format and picture
-excellent character development
-held my interest all the way to the end

 Comment Written 21-May-2015

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reply by the author on 21-May-2015

Thanks for your comments and support.

Comment from Curly Girly

Excellent

I enjoyed reading this poem. I am sure it is the everyone feels who has lost in love. It is a tough game. The pain should not be underrated. Some people can die from a broken heart.
You were mine for a long long time.
You were mine for a long, long time. / comma

 Comment Written 20-May-2015

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reply by the author on 20-May-2015

Thanks for your comments and support.

Comment from patcelaw

Excellent

If love is a game I won twice and now I don't want to take a chance on losing so I will recuse myself from the game and just be a spectator. Patricia

 Comment Written 20-May-2015

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reply by the author on 20-May-2015

Appreciate your comments and support as always. Thank you.

Comment from Bill Schott

Excellent

Don't get me started. This was a lot of fun reading (I hope I was supposed to find this funny). Sorry you were actually brokenhearted.

 Comment Written 20-May-2015

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reply by the author on 20-May-2015

Thanks for your comments and support.

Comment from Pantygynt

Excellent

You had to repeat at least one line. Cripes! You did that in spades. Repetition is no problem for the song lyric writer, and this has country and western written all all over it. It has a repeated chorus that is the same length as the verses and hammers home the theme of pain for the broken hearted an and a short couplet refrain after each verse and chorus with athe admonition "don't get me started."

A classic in the construction of its type. It should go well as a song. In the contest I guess that depends on how many C&W fans vote, because the ones that do will vote for you.

 Comment Written 20-May-2015

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reply by the author on 20-May-2015

Thanks for your comments and support as always.

reply by Pantygynt on 21-May-2015

I could recognise your stuff a mile off. Inimitable!

Comment from Louise Michelle

Excellent

I think this poem would work really well as lyrics to a song. I especially enjoyed your repeating phrase and can almost hear a country singer wailing. Good work. Hugs, Lou

 Comment Written 20-May-2015

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reply by the author on 20-May-2015

Thanks for your comments and support.

Comment from Selina Stambi

Excellent

I was able to sort of sing along in my head. This piece read like a country and western song. (I could her the guitar strumming - honest!)

Very nicely done. Best wishes for the contest. Hope you win!

Sonali

 Comment Written 19-May-2015

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reply by the author on 19-May-2015

Thank you for your support.