Comment from jim lawler

Excellent

A very nice little verse; You should come up with a melody and turn it into a love song. I like it; it has a smooth flow to it and a rather expresses a sad message. I didn't see any typos and it needs no revision. Good luck and god bless! Jim

 Comment Written 13-May-2015

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reply by the author on 13-May-2015

Thanks for your comments.

reply by jim lawler on 13-May-2015

You're welcome. Jim

Comment from Autumn Splendour

Excellent

Yes, the mirror has two faces, likewise it takes two to make love work. Betrayal breaks the mirror causing it to splinter.

I like the rhythm and the rhyme like the beating of a drum and the repetition works like a litany. The betrayed one lamenting his lover's infidelity. Lovely.

 Comment Written 13-May-2015

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reply by the author on 13-May-2015

Thanks for your comments.

Comment from inside echo

Excellent

Again what a great song/poem. You certainly have found what you're very good at. This song/poem is sad also. It tells an emotional story, still searching for that lost love. Well done. Thank you for sharing.
echo

 Comment Written 13-May-2015

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reply by the author on 13-May-2015

Thanks for your comments.

reply by inside echo on 13-May-2015

You are welcome.

Comment from addhoc

Excellent

I have to admit I don't read a lot of poetry, so I am not really qualified to give you anything but my opinion. Well I really enjoyed this piece, it told a lovely story and flowed well. I will look out for more of your work.

 Comment Written 12-May-2015

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reply by the author on 12-May-2015

Thanks for your comments. And do. I think you will enjoy them.

Comment from amahra

Excellent

I've read repeated poems before, and the trick is to repeat words that are so interesting and firey that the reader won't get bored. You've done that with these repeated lines. Great job.

Well, the mirror has two faces, like the clock upon the wall.
And our love has been in places it should never been at all.[Fantastic repeated couplets]

 Comment Written 11-May-2015

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reply by the author on 11-May-2015

Thanks for your comments.

Comment from risktaker

Excellent

It takes two to fornicate, commit adultery, and sin. Wrong can never be made right.
Sin causes pain, heartaches. I love the rhyme, word choice, and scenes depicted.The mirror is the metaphor for good and evil. Excellent

 Comment Written 11-May-2015

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reply by the author on 11-May-2015

Thanks for your comments.

reply by risktaker on 11-May-2015

ok

reply by risktaker on 11-May-2015

ok

Comment from Carulhein

Excellent

Hi, Brett, I love your poem. I think you have a very good general flow and rhythm. I am going to be cheeky and suggest a word change that I think will improve the rhythm. "Do you ever get the feeling that my love is still there." The still is a bit out of rhythm, maybe replace with lingered or something similar. Just a suggestion. Great read anyway. Have a good day.

 Comment Written 11-May-2015

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reply by the author on 11-May-2015

Thanks for your comments and support.

Comment from Dorothy Farrell

Excellent

Hi Brett - another fine lyric poem from you. The words are very good and I particularly like your repeating lines. The second of of which - 'And our love has been in places it should never been at all' - 'have been' or 'be' or 'should've'. However, just a small detail in an otherwise very good poem and a good entry for the contest. Warm regards Dorothyx

 Comment Written 11-May-2015

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reply by the author on 11-May-2015

Thanks for your comments and support as always.

Comment from c_lucas

Excellent

Love should never be a three-way competition. It should be between to equal forces sharing. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read.

 Comment Written 11-May-2015

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reply by the author on 11-May-2015

Thanks for your comments and support.

reply by c_lucas on 11-May-2015

You're welcome, Brett. Charlie

Comment from BJ_Barnes

Excellent

A lovely poem about love lost. It is very well written and flows together very smoothly. I love the photo you chose, it's beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing.

 Comment Written 11-May-2015

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reply by the author on 11-May-2015

Thanks for your comments.