Random Reflections.
Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "Paradise he lived in until the day h"Poems of Random wandering; an inward look.
2 total reviews
Comment from Janet7053
NIYUTA, I admire your ability to create the imagination so vividly of your character. You are right; we do not know what thoughts may be surfacing. I have faced this when dealing with some elderly veterans. Wish they could share what they are thinking about, but then I would be intruding.
Well written.
"she would return" not she will return. tense correction needed.
mind locked in the past not locked mind locked in the past. redundancy of the word locked.
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2015
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NIYUTA, I admire your ability to create the imagination so vividly of your character. You are right; we do not know what thoughts may be surfacing. I have faced this when dealing with some elderly veterans. Wish they could share what they are thinking about, but then I would be intruding.
Well written.
"she would return" not she will return. tense correction needed.
mind locked in the past not locked mind locked in the past. redundancy of the word locked.
Comment Written 13-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2015
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Thanks Janet: I started writing this piece from a random thought similar to what you wrote in your comment.. The errors are due to my bad habit of changing sentences and not reread them to see how they sound. I will edit the error. My best regards.
Comment from jeannaprentice
Quite a very hopeful and wonderful thought for someone in a place like that. I must applaude you for the very fine details that you put in this piece. The descriptions are fantastic. It is like you could really picture how the person appeared in this man's mind. Wonderful job overall.
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2015
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Quite a very hopeful and wonderful thought for someone in a place like that. I must applaude you for the very fine details that you put in this piece. The descriptions are fantastic. It is like you could really picture how the person appeared in this man's mind. Wonderful job overall.
Comment Written 13-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2015
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Thanks for your encouraging comment.I had observed someone really old sitting alone and lost in his own reverie and wondered if he was with someone now, who may have come and gone, leaving just the fond memories..
