Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

Hello, Stranger. I have missed your writing and am really happy you're back at it. Please keep it coming. I enjoyed reading this post and enjoyed the story. I hope you're doing well.

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2018

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reply by the author on 14-Jan-2018

Hi, Barbara. I found myself really missing the rapport I'd developed with so many of you. I'm glad to be back, and look forward to reviewing your latest.

Bev

Comment from JanPerry

Excellent

Your writing is very good and excellent too. I am so glad you did the courses to help your writing. I thought I was reading a book here.
I love your approach and everything here is written very well.
Good luck, keep up the good work.

 Comment Written 14-Jan-2018

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reply by the author on 14-Jan-2018

Hi, JanPerry. Thank you so much for your very kind words of encouragement. I do plan to end up with a novella at the end of the road. Your insights will be most helpful in that process. :) Bev

Comment from w.j.debi

Excellent

This is an excellent story for teens. They have all sorts of decisions to make, especially about friends. You set a up a realistic situation that teen would be faced with. I like the Mara has such good values and prays for inspiration to make the right decision. Jujee is lucky to have such a good friend.

The dialog is realistic and the teenage thoughts.

 Comment Written 09-Aug-2015

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reply by the author on 10-Aug-2015

Wow, you have made my day, Debi. Thanks for your insights on the narrative voice and complications being introduced into this story. That means a lot to me as I believe we tend to think along the same lines.

Much appreciated!

:) Bev

Comment from wordsfromsue

Excellent

Hi Bev, is this a book, or a one off story? I like young adult reading, this isn't a problem for me. Tell Mara I like Skillet, she can take me!

Jujee could go either way, unfortunately, but at least Mara's trying to give the girl a chance.

Jujee sounds pretty self centered, talking sbout petite clothing when Mara apparently would have no experience with those sizes.

I hope she comes to appreciate Mara's kindness.

 Comment Written 21-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 22-Jun-2015

Hi, Sue

Thanks for the great review. This is a novel--I've got a few chapters in my portfolio, and am working on the next one in a week or so. I'm alternating it with a Paranormal series. Glad you like both Skillet and Mara, I do too! Great to hear from you.

:) Bev

Comment from Joy Graham

Exceptional

Hi Bev! I'm back for two more years. I sure missed reading your work. The six star rating is for giving me some wonderful chapters to read :)

"our plan a secret was the (real) challenge..." - on my ipad the word reads "rea".

"beamed him a smile" - love this

Love the name of Demon Hunters for a Christian band

Is the Skillet band real or fiction?

Looking forward to the next chapter :)

 Comment Written 26-Mar-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Mar-2015

Hi, Joy. Hey, it's so grand to have you back! I look forward to reading your writing, my friend. I've missed you.

Thanks for the super review. I'm so glad liked the chapter. It's been quite rewarding writing this novel, as I do really believe young people benefit from being a part of a Christian community. Skillet and Demon Hunters are real bands. My nieces -- huge fans -- raved about the one and only concert they attended. I'm borrowing from their experiences and using them as a resource since it's been quite some time since I was their age!

Thanks, too, for the suggestions and insights, my friend.

Hugs, Bev

Comment from Deniz22

Excellent

I didn't see this one before, so I'm glad I went on your page...one question...don't you think a teenage girl might object to the nick name "Peanut"? Just suggesting you might want to soften it: "Princess" or just drop it? I like her growing awareness of herself (did I bribe her?) and her friend who might not be above using her...good work!

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2015

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reply by the author on 25-Feb-2015

Hi, Deniz

Thanks for your great review and suggestion. I'm basing that nickname on my niece's, so I did it for sentimental reasons, but you make a worthwhile point.

:) Bev

Comment from jaeladarling

Excellent

Doing some catching up! :) Great first chapter. Really builds up to the next, even though I know what's coming. ;) Looking forward to reading more!

A few nits:


"closing in on her and she itched" Comma after "her")

"A mid-week test was coming up and she" (Comma after "up")

"to do well only" (Comma after "well")

"She handed her a small envelope," (The comma should be a period.)

"from my grandmother who thinks" (Comma after "grandmother")

 Comment Written 09-Feb-2015

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reply by the author on 09-Feb-2015

Thanks so much for your review and insights, J. Appreciate it... Bev

Comment from Roxanna Andrews

Excellent

This is so different from your other books. I'm very interested to read it. It's well done as always. I haven't been on the site much these days, I'm so busy at work I'm pooped when I get home, plus I now have an online card shop that keeps me hoping. =} I But I will be sure to log in to read the rest of your book. Roxanna

 Comment Written 03-Feb-2015

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reply by the author on 03-Feb-2015

Thanks for the great review, Rox. I appreciate you taking time to read the chapter. Yes, I'm trying my hand at
a project that speaks to my spirit. Appreciate your support and insights, as always.

Hugs, Bev

Comment from MissMerri

Excellent

This promises to be an outstanding story. I already like the cast of characters and am hooked in, wanting to know what happens next. You include plenty of detail, making things seem very real. I enjoyed this very much. Also, your editing is outstanding. Just saw one tiny thing:

***They worried she might not *(be) have the time to monitor Jujee's activities. *(delete "be')

Looking forward to the rest of the story. MM

 Comment Written 24-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 26-Jan-2015

Hi, MissMerri. Thanks for this awesome review. I appreciate your insights and support very much. Also, thank you for catching the spaggie. I really need to learn to edit in my browser after zooming to about 150! :))

Warm regards, Bev

Comment from MM lives on :)

Exceptional

Hey Bev, I love the way your writing is so diversified and that you can switch audiences yet still draw in the adult crowd with your thick plot and phenom dialogue.

Sorry for the delay in the review. I will have to look back to get the full flavor of this but love it so far.

7 STARS FLY! :) XXOO

 Comment Written 17-Jan-2015

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reply by the author on 17-Jan-2015

Thanks so much, Christopher, for your kind encouragement and support. It means a lot to me that you feel adults can relate as well as teens. It's always so nice to hear from you and get your insights. I appreciate you!

:) Bev