Already Gone
The most deadliest thing in this world is ourselves.16 total reviews
Comment from Sherylsart
Wonderfully written. Your emotions are tangible, with good imagery. Your words flow readily, nothing to stumble on. I did a lot of writing when I was your age, also writing poetry. It is a good outlet for emotions. Thank you for sharing this poem.
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2015
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Wonderfully written. Your emotions are tangible, with good imagery. Your words flow readily, nothing to stumble on. I did a lot of writing when I was your age, also writing poetry. It is a good outlet for emotions. Thank you for sharing this poem.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2015
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Thank you so much for you kind words and lovely review
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
A beautifully written, well composed poem of deep emotion. The poem begs for recognition of internal pain, and for help, though the time for help may be long past.
Well done,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2015
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A beautifully written, well composed poem of deep emotion. The poem begs for recognition of internal pain, and for help, though the time for help may be long past.
Well done,
Rhonda
Comment Written 29-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2015
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Thank you so much for your review
Comment from Jacob Collins
This was a sad piece of writing in which the victim loses their fight and succumbs to death. I really liked how you wrote this and I liked the speech you used in the middle. Your writing flowed well and I couldn't find any faults. Thanks for sharing...Jacob
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2015
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This was a sad piece of writing in which the victim loses their fight and succumbs to death. I really liked how you wrote this and I liked the speech you used in the middle. Your writing flowed well and I couldn't find any faults. Thanks for sharing...Jacob
Comment Written 29-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2015
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Thank you so much for your kind words and great review
Comment from Bill Schott
The thrust here seems to be teenage angst that attacks us all in some degree or another. It doesn't necessarily stop when we're older, but surviving it and realizing it's a passing thing gets easier.
reply by the author on 26-Nov-2015
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The thrust here seems to be teenage angst that attacks us all in some degree or another. It doesn't necessarily stop when we're older, but surviving it and realizing it's a passing thing gets easier.
Comment Written 26-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 26-Nov-2015
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Thanks for this review. Happy Thanksgiving
Comment from Joyce Long
Good luck in the Free Verse contest. This poem seems very sad, but it does reflect the feelings of most teenagers. Their lives have many different directions to take. However, they need to learn and understand that "this too will pass" and tomorrow could be a better day.
It is important to smile and speak kindly to everyone as we don't know what problems they have.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Joyce 11-26-15
reply by the author on 26-Nov-2015
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Good luck in the Free Verse contest. This poem seems very sad, but it does reflect the feelings of most teenagers. Their lives have many different directions to take. However, they need to learn and understand that "this too will pass" and tomorrow could be a better day.
It is important to smile and speak kindly to everyone as we don't know what problems they have.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Joyce 11-26-15
Comment Written 26-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 26-Nov-2015
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Happy Thanksgiving to you as well.
Comment from patcelaw
It is so true we can often be our worse enemy in this life. Careless words, careless actions or just doing something that hurts another. Blessings Patricia
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2015
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It is so true we can often be our worse enemy in this life. Careless words, careless actions or just doing something that hurts another. Blessings Patricia
Comment Written 23-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2015
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Thank you for your review
Comment from donaldcolson
Quite expressive moving poem in which drowning is despair he's seemed ro reach the point of hopelessness. But if that was completely so who is writing the poem? don
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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Quite expressive moving poem in which drowning is despair he's seemed ro reach the point of hopelessness. But if that was completely so who is writing the poem? don
Comment Written 21-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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Thank you for your kind words and your review
Comment from Veeb
You have constructed a beautiful poem depicting the pit of depression. There are screams for help, but unfortunately, when the illness reaches that 'crossover place,' there is no help. You have done a fine job with illuminating the emotions ("clawing at the surface") and there is wonderful imagery ("letting the sorrow consume me).
This has a very good tempo with a smooth flow of words. I hear what you are saying! Nicely done!
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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You have constructed a beautiful poem depicting the pit of depression. There are screams for help, but unfortunately, when the illness reaches that 'crossover place,' there is no help. You have done a fine job with illuminating the emotions ("clawing at the surface") and there is wonderful imagery ("letting the sorrow consume me).
This has a very good tempo with a smooth flow of words. I hear what you are saying! Nicely done!
Comment Written 21-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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Thank you for your review. I am glad you enjoyed it.
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most welcome; my pleasure!
Comment from jessyjamespoems
VERY NICE-This work has a lot of true hard emotions, that are hard to ignore! This is sad but it is all the more true! I have been inside this work and it was once me, this should touch home to many readers that have and do go through these deep emotions of the heart and soul! When I read poetry like this, it really touches me at heart, and I pray its just a write, and not a part of their life! I had lived this life for many of my years- This poem touches those feelings of yesteryear and brings those times back to my memory and my heart. I really enjoyed this, the words flowed smoothly, and easy to comprehend the story, and the emotions, that gives this story, life! Excellent piece of ART WORK you have created with your words!! THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS WITH ME!!
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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VERY NICE-This work has a lot of true hard emotions, that are hard to ignore! This is sad but it is all the more true! I have been inside this work and it was once me, this should touch home to many readers that have and do go through these deep emotions of the heart and soul! When I read poetry like this, it really touches me at heart, and I pray its just a write, and not a part of their life! I had lived this life for many of my years- This poem touches those feelings of yesteryear and brings those times back to my memory and my heart. I really enjoyed this, the words flowed smoothly, and easy to comprehend the story, and the emotions, that gives this story, life! Excellent piece of ART WORK you have created with your words!! THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS WITH ME!!
Comment Written 21-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2015
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Thank you for your kind words, I am glad you enjoyed my poem
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I was BLESSED to read it, and I'm very glad you shared it! A lot of readers will be able to connect with this fine piece of ART you shared!! THANK YOU FOR SHARING IT!!
Comment from TAB_that's me
This is a wonderful free verse poem! Well written with emotion. Great entry for the contest - good luck in it. Welcome to FanStory:)
Teresa
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2015
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This is a wonderful free verse poem! Well written with emotion. Great entry for the contest - good luck in it. Welcome to FanStory:)
Teresa
Comment Written 13-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2015
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Thanks for your review and welcome! I love it on here
