Comment from Domino 2

Excellent

Hi, Dean.

11th line - do you mean, 'a seat'?

Good job Rotten Randy gut his just desserts at the hand of Marion's smokin' derringer, recovered from poor ole hubby, Joe's body.

Excellent Western atmosphere and build-up to the shoot-out, with the tumbleweed and hot sun thrown into the mix to add imagery as the blood-thirsty gambling crowd looked on.

Love the chosen oldy Western artwork. LOL at 'kindly do your soliciting discreetly'. I wonder if many of them horny ole cowboys could even read, let alone understand those long words. :-)

Top gunslingin' write.

Cheers, Ray

 Comment Written 22-Dec-2014

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reply by the author on 23-Dec-2014

Thank you very much, Ray, I really appreciate the review, mate.

As for the eleventh line, I did mean seat, and that's what I'm seeing. What do you see? Here are the first three lines cut and pasted from that stanza...

"With the lawman dead Randy Red headed straight for the Shady Lady saloon,

where Mandy Chan ? from the Mongol Clan ? was a' singin' a mournful tune.

He burst through the door, spit on the floor, then took at seat down at the bar." It sure looks like "seat" to me, but you're not the only person to have mentioned it. I suppose I'd better look into it post haste, huh?

As to whether or not them horny toad cowpokes read the signs at the Shady lady, I seriously doubt it. After all, many of them couldn't read or write a lick back then, heh-heh.

Thanks again, Ray!

Cheers. ;)

~DeanO

reply by Domino 2 on 23-Dec-2014

I'm referring to the 'AN seat', Deano, Should be 'a seat' - I think. :-)

Cheers, mate. Ray

reply by the author on 23-Dec-2014

Gotcha! :)

Comment from kiwijenny

Excellent

Dean this was a great answer to Charlie/Louis L'Amour western theme
I liked it ...but in your poem we get brass tacks facts...in a novel like Charlie's we'd get to love or hate the characters...more
Marion Lear needs fleshing out...not according to her picture but ...you know you could write a novel
:o)
God bless and Merry Merry Christmas

 Comment Written 22-Dec-2014

Comment from sweetwoodjax

Excellent

this is an excellent write, dean, you did an excellent job writing this story poem about the man who beat death once at his love's hand, but the second one took him down and she mourned for the one that he killed off to have her.

 Comment Written 22-Dec-2014

Comment from Christof McTarnahan

Exceptional

Top notch, D-Nuts, everything I would expect in a western yarn.I had set to an old Rowdy Yates type tune in my head.As always, vibrant with descriptors and bursting with colorful personalaties... hence hath been born another Kuch classic.

 Comment Written 22-Dec-2014

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

I am sure Charlie will appreciate you poem. I can't imagine he wouldn't. I never liked Western until I started reading his. I am a little disappointed in your wonderful poem. Couldn't you come up with a Christmas for this holiday??? LOL Your poem is wonderful..

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 Comment Written 22-Dec-2014