Vision and Sound: Their Stories
Viewing comments for Chapter 21 "A Journey and A Surprise Meeting"Two souls that meet as strangers on earth.
15 total reviews
Comment from country ranch writer
ONE IS GRACED WITH WISDOM OF THE HEALING AND SHALL GO FAR IF ONE WILL LISTEN TO THE OTHERS OF AGE AND KNOW WHAT IT TAKES TO GET THERE
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ONE IS GRACED WITH WISDOM OF THE HEALING AND SHALL GO FAR IF ONE WILL LISTEN TO THE OTHERS OF AGE AND KNOW WHAT IT TAKES TO GET THERE
Comment Written 05-Oct-2014
Comment from Jay Squires
Mikey, you had to set your alarm for a 3AM Post. At 7AM it was only worth 2 cents! LOL, Good thing that's still a baragain!
You know what I love about your writing, Mikey, at least in this series, is your characters' psychological soundness. Their thought processes are consistent with their actions. Not a small feat.
ALWAYS... you must remember to put punctuation INSIDE the closed quote. It's minor from the point of content goes. It's almost invisible, but it's there, and wrong. >> Dumb luck, I suppose". >> should be: "I SUPPOSE." I've noted you've done this throughout, not this one instance.]
Earnest and eager served him well in the eyes of this learned man. [I don't know, I think this sentence can be improved, Mikey.
At the sound of that name, Father Leopold turned quickly.[Oh, oh, oh! What a turn of events! And, what a way to end the chapter.]
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2014
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Mikey, you had to set your alarm for a 3AM Post. At 7AM it was only worth 2 cents! LOL, Good thing that's still a baragain!
You know what I love about your writing, Mikey, at least in this series, is your characters' psychological soundness. Their thought processes are consistent with their actions. Not a small feat.
ALWAYS... you must remember to put punctuation INSIDE the closed quote. It's minor from the point of content goes. It's almost invisible, but it's there, and wrong. >> Dumb luck, I suppose". >> should be: "I SUPPOSE." I've noted you've done this throughout, not this one instance.]
Earnest and eager served him well in the eyes of this learned man. [I don't know, I think this sentence can be improved, Mikey.
At the sound of that name, Father Leopold turned quickly.[Oh, oh, oh! What a turn of events! And, what a way to end the chapter.]
Comment Written 05-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2014
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Sorry about the two cents. I was still up at three. :)) I try to stay up until I get the two reviews and then put the little certificate on it. I actually fell asleep! I didn't realize it wasn't promoted until you just pointed it out, so thank you! Punctuation inside the quotes. I don't know how that ever became confused in my mind. I know someone convinced me to do the opposite. I'll try to go back to the way that is natural for me which seems to be the right way after all. I started laughing when I read the sentence you singled out, so I think you may be right about improving it. Hahaha! It does sound odd. I am so pleased that you are enjoying this. Great encouragement and advice. Thank you kindly, mikey
Comment from gypsycaravan
I like the easy relationship that has developed between Valerius and Trelletia. I wonder if Valerius will learn why Leopold is there in Constantinople.
One typo:
waiting for super,---"super" should be "supper"
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I like the easy relationship that has developed between Valerius and Trelletia. I wonder if Valerius will learn why Leopold is there in Constantinople.
One typo:
waiting for super,---"super" should be "supper"
Comment Written 05-Oct-2014
Comment from robina1978
A more peaceful chapter. Excellent photo to complement it. I like that the boy seeks refuge in herbal medicine. Thanks for sharing.
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A more peaceful chapter. Excellent photo to complement it. I like that the boy seeks refuge in herbal medicine. Thanks for sharing.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-Oct-2014
Comment from Michaelk
This is an interesting turn. Is there to be a debate over Julia right there in the church courtyard? This will either bring greater attention to her, or it will warm Valerius of just how strong the danger is to her.
This story is interesting, but it isn't as passionate as the last. I don't know what it is. Maybe the stakes haven't been set as high. The last time they were at war (Allutia and Tibertin) You spoiled me with the last story. Maybe this time is just slow in building.
This last discussion Julia had with her father, it seems like he's had that discussion before. You said that his anger is rarely kindled with her. But it didn't seem to be kindled with her this time either, even when she talked back to him. I know that as a father, if the kids were playing around and got seriously hurt for no real reason, I would be pissed at the one that caused it. But that just doesn't show.
It's a good story, very interesting. I love the fact that Valerius is learning and traveling around, but there just doesn't seem to be a lot of emotion going around.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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This is an interesting turn. Is there to be a debate over Julia right there in the church courtyard? This will either bring greater attention to her, or it will warm Valerius of just how strong the danger is to her.
This story is interesting, but it isn't as passionate as the last. I don't know what it is. Maybe the stakes haven't been set as high. The last time they were at war (Allutia and Tibertin) You spoiled me with the last story. Maybe this time is just slow in building.
This last discussion Julia had with her father, it seems like he's had that discussion before. You said that his anger is rarely kindled with her. But it didn't seem to be kindled with her this time either, even when she talked back to him. I know that as a father, if the kids were playing around and got seriously hurt for no real reason, I would be pissed at the one that caused it. But that just doesn't show.
It's a good story, very interesting. I love the fact that Valerius is learning and traveling around, but there just doesn't seem to be a lot of emotion going around.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-Oct-2014
