Fare-Thee-Well
I just know she's bad for me...52 total reviews
Comment from Tonulak
Hi Dean,
You always have such lovely turns of phrase. I liked the "melting shell", but I like m&m's:) Just kidding. This was a really fine entry, also very unique and creative. Best of luck--Ted
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2014
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Hi Dean,
You always have such lovely turns of phrase. I liked the "melting shell", but I like m&m's:) Just kidding. This was a really fine entry, also very unique and creative. Best of luck--Ted
Comment Written 26-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2014
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Thanks a bunch, Ted. And I too like M&M's, LOL.
I appreciate your review, my friend.:)
Comment from DerivedBetter
I didn't doubt that this would be good and you didn't disappoint. I didn't see any obvious errors and I think any guy can relate to this one. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2014
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I didn't doubt that this would be good and you didn't disappoint. I didn't see any obvious errors and I think any guy can relate to this one. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2014
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Thanks, DerivedBetter. I appreciate it!:)
Comment from ArtGal
I just have to give you another six, just can't help it! The reason, oh I shouldn't admit, but when I was quite young, very young, I was enthralled by an older man, and couldn't stop being with him, every chance I had. Little did I know, he had not only a wife but several other girlfriends on the side! I'm not too dumb, so when I found out, took all his 'I Love You' notes that he gave me, and set them on fire. Delivered them, ashes, to his office and said 'I'm free'! He called for weeks, but I didn't answer, oh so very hard though. We have to learn eventually. I wish you the best of luck, once again. And though you're busy, please read my poem to you when you can. . .Sharon
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2014
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I just have to give you another six, just can't help it! The reason, oh I shouldn't admit, but when I was quite young, very young, I was enthralled by an older man, and couldn't stop being with him, every chance I had. Little did I know, he had not only a wife but several other girlfriends on the side! I'm not too dumb, so when I found out, took all his 'I Love You' notes that he gave me, and set them on fire. Delivered them, ashes, to his office and said 'I'm free'! He called for weeks, but I didn't answer, oh so very hard though. We have to learn eventually. I wish you the best of luck, once again. And though you're busy, please read my poem to you when you can. . .Sharon
Comment Written 25-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2014
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Thanks, AtrGal, I really appreciate the review and your personal story. Thanks for the six stars, too.
Which poem would you like me to read? I'll be more than happy to take a look.:]
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You're so very welcome, and you already read it, so thanks!
Comment from acerisestory
Let's see, Dean. The prompt was that it could be sad, raw, or just plain angry. Your poem fits "raw" perfectly!
It is very well written and your descriptions are quite amazing. What a fix the guy is in; he just can't help himself, no matter the consequences. I had to look up "succubus." I am now enlightened!
Your poem flows very well with excellent use of alliteration and rhyme. A wonderful entry for the contest. I wish you luck and give you another of my sixes! Take care. Alana
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Let's see, Dean. The prompt was that it could be sad, raw, or just plain angry. Your poem fits "raw" perfectly!
It is very well written and your descriptions are quite amazing. What a fix the guy is in; he just can't help himself, no matter the consequences. I had to look up "succubus." I am now enlightened!
Your poem flows very well with excellent use of alliteration and rhyme. A wonderful entry for the contest. I wish you luck and give you another of my sixes! Take care. Alana
Comment Written 25-Aug-2014
Comment from LIJ Red
Only takes one that works. All others are generally wrong.
I'd live down that loathsome succubus line for ages, knowing my luck. Fine writing,by the way.
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Only takes one that works. All others are generally wrong.
I'd live down that loathsome succubus line for ages, knowing my luck. Fine writing,by the way.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2014
Comment from HAREEDS
Love and lust and life in general is all a learning curve for us all. Your poem looks at the darker side of love and gives an interesting take on the writing prompt. The dark obsession in the poem to possess and give themselves to a lover is very well expressed here. A very good contest entry.
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Love and lust and life in general is all a learning curve for us all. Your poem looks at the darker side of love and gives an interesting take on the writing prompt. The dark obsession in the poem to possess and give themselves to a lover is very well expressed here. A very good contest entry.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2014
Comment from TAB_that's me
A great entry Dean for the love bites contest. I hope it did or does well. yep, we probably all have been there some time or another.
teresa
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A great entry Dean for the love bites contest. I hope it did or does well. yep, we probably all have been there some time or another.
teresa
Comment Written 25-Aug-2014
Comment from onebrit
Great artwork. I love how you think that she is so bad for you, knowing it can only end badly, and yet go for it anyway! Great rhymes, so well written....sex will get you every time.
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Great artwork. I love how you think that she is so bad for you, knowing it can only end badly, and yet go for it anyway! Great rhymes, so well written....sex will get you every time.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2014
Comment from Linda England Bonam
This was chillingly good! And I mean that I got the chills! Years ago I dated a man who I knew was nothing but bad news. But, when he was charming, he was very charming and when he was horrible......well it was really bad! Your line, 'I am so sure this won't end' well seemed to be my thinking from start to finish...thanks for reminding me how good I have it now!!!
When I snapped out of it, ended it abruptly, told him to take a hike....I ended up having to disconnect my home phone, my cell phone, and move to another address!!!!
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2014
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This was chillingly good! And I mean that I got the chills! Years ago I dated a man who I knew was nothing but bad news. But, when he was charming, he was very charming and when he was horrible......well it was really bad! Your line, 'I am so sure this won't end' well seemed to be my thinking from start to finish...thanks for reminding me how good I have it now!!!
When I snapped out of it, ended it abruptly, told him to take a hike....I ended up having to disconnect my home phone, my cell phone, and move to another address!!!!
Comment Written 25-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2014
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Thanks for the six stars, and for sharing that bit of personal history with me, Linda. I appreciate that!
Yeah, I think we've all been down that dark alley a time or two. I know I sure have! I had a girl who knew I was dating others besides her, and she still drove all the way from Toledo, Ohio, to Dayton, Ohio, where I lived at that time, just to spy on me! One night while I was with a female cousin of mine, she called me wanting to know who the little tramp was I was with. She described my cousin Mary and everything! It scared the hell out of me, so I called it quits for good with her.
Thanks again, my friend, and no more stalkers, ya' hear? (LOL)
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That's a deal! I enjoyed your story, too! It is scary out there! hahaha
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:>0... Heh-heh...
Comment from adewpearl
stunning presentation of your poem
good alliteration in phrases such as partially paralyzed and quaking quivering
strong rhyming couplets
extreme passion in a gruesome kind of way LOL :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2014
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stunning presentation of your poem
good alliteration in phrases such as partially paralyzed and quaking quivering
strong rhyming couplets
extreme passion in a gruesome kind of way LOL :-) Brooke
Comment Written 25-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2014
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LMAO...thanks, Brooke...I think, heh-heh... :)
