Challenge Me
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "A Quest for Seashells and Sunsets"I dare you....
11 total reviews
Comment from mmichelle97219
This is a cool almost dreamlike poem. It has very fantastical qualities about it as well as layers of metaphorical meanings. Nice write. I could only find one thing.
roman Should be capitalized.
Good write. Be blessed.
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2006
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This is a cool almost dreamlike poem. It has very fantastical qualities about it as well as layers of metaphorical meanings. Nice write. I could only find one thing.
roman Should be capitalized.
Good write. Be blessed.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2006
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2006
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oops
will check on that
thanx! :-)
Comment from DySaintDrama
Man, is Sky a CPCC ( Cetified Professional Challenge Chick) or what?? Interesting array of words and you chose the evil route of incorporating the much maligned senryu formulae. It's a very nice poem and runs as smoothly as silk. Uh, what were the new words from you again? lol. Jeff
A title, how about She Seeks Seashells by the Seashore?
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Man, is Sky a CPCC ( Cetified Professional Challenge Chick) or what?? Interesting array of words and you chose the evil route of incorporating the much maligned senryu formulae. It's a very nice poem and runs as smoothly as silk. Uh, what were the new words from you again? lol. Jeff
A title, how about She Seeks Seashells by the Seashore?
Comment Written 24-Aug-2005
Comment from Dreamdancer
Hi
awesome write and it seems you have met and matched the challenge. The poem has a very nice appeal in it's simplicity and is complimented by the imagery. Thanks for sharing my friend. Buddy
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Hi
awesome write and it seems you have met and matched the challenge. The poem has a very nice appeal in it's simplicity and is complimented by the imagery. Thanks for sharing my friend. Buddy
Comment Written 24-Aug-2005
Comment from AuroraSky
Oh man, what a set up!!
Do you realise that I just completed a challenge with these words--goat, fence, acrobat, dirty and pillow?
Your challenge will be fun--Btw, I love the way you used the challenge words I gave you--sequin fins reminded me of my daughter's Barbie mermaids.
Well done Shelley!
Btw, how about 'Beachcombing' as the title?
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Oh man, what a set up!!
Do you realise that I just completed a challenge with these words--goat, fence, acrobat, dirty and pillow?
Your challenge will be fun--Btw, I love the way you used the challenge words I gave you--sequin fins reminded me of my daughter's Barbie mermaids.
Well done Shelley!
Btw, how about 'Beachcombing' as the title?
Comment Written 24-Aug-2005
Comment from Ben Gate
I like this a lot. There are too many nice turns of phrase to count - sparkling sequin fins stands out - but what I really like is the use of lower case only, which gives an understated feel to the poem. I think that fits well with the mood of walking along a quiet beach. I'll be taking a peek at some of your other work later, Shelley, so expect to hear my droning e-voice again. For now, thanks
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I like this a lot. There are too many nice turns of phrase to count - sparkling sequin fins stands out - but what I really like is the use of lower case only, which gives an understated feel to the poem. I think that fits well with the mood of walking along a quiet beach. I'll be taking a peek at some of your other work later, Shelley, so expect to hear my droning e-voice again. For now, thanks
Comment Written 24-Aug-2005
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
This is very well done to tackled the task at hand really well , it is very well written and presented , by reviewing the poetry on here today I am learning so much I will certainly try one of these this piece is well written well presented well done
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This is very well done to tackled the task at hand really well , it is very well written and presented , by reviewing the poetry on here today I am learning so much I will certainly try one of these this piece is well written well presented well done
Comment Written 24-Aug-2005
Comment from sharon fallis
At the bottom of the poem you said "mermaids on Neptune" I think It would be better to use---mermaids [of] Neptune' Neptune was a God, not an Island, rock or fish. See what I mean??
The poem is excellent, very well written and portrayed. Good " What we call a Senryu lineup' made an excellent bit of reading. Good syllable count in each senryu, and altogether a wonderful flowing piece of poetry. Good job of getting all the words used that you were allotted. I sure did enjoy this read.
Thank you for sharing. Sharon
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At the bottom of the poem you said "mermaids on Neptune" I think It would be better to use---mermaids [of] Neptune' Neptune was a God, not an Island, rock or fish. See what I mean??
The poem is excellent, very well written and portrayed. Good " What we call a Senryu lineup' made an excellent bit of reading. Good syllable count in each senryu, and altogether a wonderful flowing piece of poetry. Good job of getting all the words used that you were allotted. I sure did enjoy this read.
Thank you for sharing. Sharon
Comment Written 24-Aug-2005
Comment from sengwriter
I would like to title this nice challenging poem as "Quenching Quest".
This poem is a splendor of nice distributed serenity of a sea beach. As a beachcomber you wonder with your mind's eye open and your search is so valuable and matching to your mind.
As per as the challenge is concerned, I would consider Aurora's great intution to inspire and kindle your power of imagination again and you as an acceptor met the challenge superbly and classically.
I liked the details and especially the ending you've precisely designed for your poem.
Gautam
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I would like to title this nice challenging poem as "Quenching Quest".
This poem is a splendor of nice distributed serenity of a sea beach. As a beachcomber you wonder with your mind's eye open and your search is so valuable and matching to your mind.
As per as the challenge is concerned, I would consider Aurora's great intution to inspire and kindle your power of imagination again and you as an acceptor met the challenge superbly and classically.
I liked the details and especially the ending you've precisely designed for your poem.
Gautam
Comment Written 24-Aug-2005
Comment from ishta
Very cool. The mermaids, are the pretty young ladies, right? Either way I will interpret. It's very fun, and very exciting in a way. It makes me want to go to the beach, and I'm not a beach goer. Good job.
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Very cool. The mermaids, are the pretty young ladies, right? Either way I will interpret. It's very fun, and very exciting in a way. It makes me want to go to the beach, and I'm not a beach goer. Good job.
Comment Written 24-Aug-2005
Comment from NybCR
Very unique. It's quite good, but I'd recommend rethinking some of the wording in one or two of those senyrus. I believe the second senyru would make more sense if it said "for they are as rare a find/as unbroken hearts." That's merely a suggestion, though. Otherwise, I like it very much.
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Very unique. It's quite good, but I'd recommend rethinking some of the wording in one or two of those senyrus. I believe the second senyru would make more sense if it said "for they are as rare a find/as unbroken hearts." That's merely a suggestion, though. Otherwise, I like it very much.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 24-Aug-2005
