The Bard of Bel Air
Viewing comments for Chapter 33 "Ruby's New Job"A homeless man sees more than people realize.
11 total reviews
Comment from Sankey
Great chapter mate! Really into this big time. Note my suggestions and spag pickups ok!
and the sun covered its eyes. he he good one
Been thinking this is a good script for a Mel Brooks movie is he still around?
You would make a goo imitation not sure on looks though hehe.
Suggestion in following
I wonder if Junior('s being) ready to skip town will be news to Winston
You did this right here..."Harpster's" ...need to correct same in your Introduction to chapter
well, as long as you're(they're) the one with the biggest wallet".
The(y) waved a search warrant
Are you sure KIEL HALL shouldn't be KEEL HALL?
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Great chapter mate! Really into this big time. Note my suggestions and spag pickups ok!
and the sun covered its eyes. he he good one
Been thinking this is a good script for a Mel Brooks movie is he still around?
You would make a goo imitation not sure on looks though hehe.
Suggestion in following
I wonder if Junior('s being) ready to skip town will be news to Winston
You did this right here..."Harpster's" ...need to correct same in your Introduction to chapter
well, as long as you're(they're) the one with the biggest wallet".
The(y) waved a search warrant
Are you sure KIEL HALL shouldn't be KEEL HALL?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-May-2014
