Sins of My Father
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "The Sniffles"A coming of age story.
14 total reviews
Comment from Sankey
Love the family descriptions can't help but feel there is some comparison to real life in there some where.
Shock horror no spags!
reply by the author on 28-May-2014
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Love the family descriptions can't help but feel there is some comparison to real life in there some where.
Shock horror no spags!
Comment Written 14-May-2014
reply by the author on 28-May-2014
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My life was nothing compared to this. Just love to people watch and these characters come to life for me. Great review. Gretchen
Comment from padumachitta
HI...The line that comes through for m is the ...chill going down Rory's spine...it is heating up and like booze, one never knows where it is gonna end up...
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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HI...The line that comes through for m is the ...chill going down Rory's spine...it is heating up and like booze, one never knows where it is gonna end up...
Comment Written 24-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2014
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Thank you for the great review. Gretchen
Comment from Gladness
I like the way you put together his thought process, and the discriptions you used for family and other thing. The "playing fetch with a rabid dog" was a good one.
Anita
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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I like the way you put together his thought process, and the discriptions you used for family and other thing. The "playing fetch with a rabid dog" was a good one.
Anita
Comment Written 23-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Thank you so much for the wonderful review. Gretchen
Comment from Muffins
Continuous interest in this story; snappy dialogue, fast paced, real life characters. Rory is one of those characters a reader takes inside and wants it to work out well in the end. And, now meeting his extended family the reader is interested in the dad's background and his childhood.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Continuous interest in this story; snappy dialogue, fast paced, real life characters. Rory is one of those characters a reader takes inside and wants it to work out well in the end. And, now meeting his extended family the reader is interested in the dad's background and his childhood.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Thank you for the wonderful review. Gretchen
Comment from Sefiros
I do think Rory's inquisitive. He's able to analyze and deduce the traits his family has. He's an investigator. I think he'll be a very good one when he gets older. Nice character models.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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I do think Rory's inquisitive. He's able to analyze and deduce the traits his family has. He's an investigator. I think he'll be a very good one when he gets older. Nice character models.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Thank you so much for the wonderful review. Gretchen
Comment from Jay Squires
This is another warm, moving chapter. I'm noticing a trend away from Rory at school. Is it my imagination? I started following this when he was involved with his school relationships. And, now it's all home, with his father's drinking issues. I don't mean this as criticism, only curiosity.
You've developed such authentic-sounding characters. I like to study the POV character in all his relationships.
I noticed, by the way, there is a spacing problem between lines. You may want to go in and clean that up. No other nits I can see.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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This is another warm, moving chapter. I'm noticing a trend away from Rory at school. Is it my imagination? I started following this when he was involved with his school relationships. And, now it's all home, with his father's drinking issues. I don't mean this as criticism, only curiosity.
You've developed such authentic-sounding characters. I like to study the POV character in all his relationships.
I noticed, by the way, there is a spacing problem between lines. You may want to go in and clean that up. No other nits I can see.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Thank you for the great review. I will check on the spacing problems. Thanks again. Gretchen
Comment from nancy_e_davis
He will eventually realize they are all different. That life molds a person into who they are. That choices are important. At least he is truthful, an open book it seems. Can't keep a secret or hide one either. LOL Good job Nancy
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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He will eventually realize they are all different. That life molds a person into who they are. That choices are important. At least he is truthful, an open book it seems. Can't keep a secret or hide one either. LOL Good job Nancy
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Most teenaged boys can't keep a secret. They may not tell their parents but they blab to someone. Thank you for the great review. Gretchen
Comment from Spiritual Echo
It's a collective six for a well launched novel, with a nod of appreciation of how you got into the head of Rory and introduced so many characters in a seamless and fluid line.
It took until the last chapter for me to start questioning why Dean is raising the boy and those circumstances, but I'm sure you'll play them out in due course.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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It's a collective six for a well launched novel, with a nod of appreciation of how you got into the head of Rory and introduced so many characters in a seamless and fluid line.
It took until the last chapter for me to start questioning why Dean is raising the boy and those circumstances, but I'm sure you'll play them out in due course.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Thank you for the wonderful reveiw and the nice comments. I very much appreciate the six as well. Gretchen
Comment from Misrael
Poor Rory I feel sorry for him with a family background like that. Of course he does seem to be rather tough which will help in the long run. Good read and keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Poor Rory I feel sorry for him with a family background like that. Of course he does seem to be rather tough which will help in the long run. Good read and keep up the good work.
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Thank you so much for the nice review. Gretchen
Comment from Rosalyne
Hi, Gretchen.
This is a great chapter of insights into Rory's life. I like the way you've described each of the characters, with their own distinct personalities. The grandmother is an interesting character and an important figure in Rory's life.
Bye
Rosalyne :)
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Hi, Gretchen.
This is a great chapter of insights into Rory's life. I like the way you've described each of the characters, with their own distinct personalities. The grandmother is an interesting character and an important figure in Rory's life.
Bye
Rosalyne :)
Comment Written 22-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014
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Thank you for the great review. Gretchen
