History and Myth
Viewing comments for Chapter 28 "A Pirate's Tale"Poems that tell stories of long ago
31 total reviews
Comment from adewpearl
solid rhyming in good sonnet form
excellent use of iambic meter to make for good cadence when read aloud
excellent use of the repeating/transition lines
nice touches of alliteration in phrases like pirate's plight
and Dublin docks
I like that you chose to tell a story, which works better with this long form than 7 variations on a theme, in my opinion
a dramatic story from the time the narrator was a boy raised in a way that seems designed to create a criminal to the moments before he is to be hanged
Brooke
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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solid rhyming in good sonnet form
excellent use of iambic meter to make for good cadence when read aloud
excellent use of the repeating/transition lines
nice touches of alliteration in phrases like pirate's plight
and Dublin docks
I like that you chose to tell a story, which works better with this long form than 7 variations on a theme, in my opinion
a dramatic story from the time the narrator was a boy raised in a way that seems designed to create a criminal to the moments before he is to be hanged
Brooke
Comment Written 22-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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Thank you Brooke. I appreciate your input. I'm pleased with how it came out. I never wrote one before and was hesitant to try.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Wow, Tom! That was an amazing poem! I love anything to do with the sea, and this one had everything! A crown of sonnets, I've not penned one sonnet, let alone all those. I love the Irish coming out in it, and all the history, it is a very entertaining poem, an excellent, story in a poem too! xsx sandra
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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Wow, Tom! That was an amazing poem! I love anything to do with the sea, and this one had everything! A crown of sonnets, I've not penned one sonnet, let alone all those. I love the Irish coming out in it, and all the history, it is a very entertaining poem, an excellent, story in a poem too! xsx sandra
Comment Written 22-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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Thank you Sandra. It was hard work, but I liked how it turned out. I just finished a book on pirates and that was my inspiration.
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Are you going to post it on here? I am in the middle of a short Indian story. Be nice to read yours. xsx
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It's not mine. It's a book, The Pirate Wars by Peter Earle.
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Sorry! Got it the wrong way round! LOL.
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
Wow! One Sonnet has me really thing hard so.... a Crown of Sonnets is a creative feat indeed.
A very creative tale with much attention given to authenticity and detail.
Avery creative contest entry.
Good luck.
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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Wow! One Sonnet has me really thing hard so.... a Crown of Sonnets is a creative feat indeed.
A very creative tale with much attention given to authenticity and detail.
Avery creative contest entry.
Good luck.
Comment Written 22-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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Thank you Shirley. Glad you liked it. Appreciate the best wishes, I never did one before, read some of the others, and was hesitant to write it and enter.
Comment from Joan E.
Thank you for sharing this tale about becoming an "ocean-hugging man" in this tour de force form. I admired your rhythms and rhymes in these sonnets. Your Irish dialect and use of the first person added immediacy as well. Your "cod" simile is clever and your alliterative "f's" toward the end add intensity. All your linking, repeating lines are extremely well chosen and effective. I'm only sorry I don't have the six this work deserves. Happy weekend- Joan
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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Thank you for sharing this tale about becoming an "ocean-hugging man" in this tour de force form. I admired your rhythms and rhymes in these sonnets. Your Irish dialect and use of the first person added immediacy as well. Your "cod" simile is clever and your alliterative "f's" toward the end add intensity. All your linking, repeating lines are extremely well chosen and effective. I'm only sorry I don't have the six this work deserves. Happy weekend- Joan
Comment Written 22-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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Thank you Joan. I can fell you captured the mood.
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Ahoy! You transported me to those ole pirate days... -Joan
Comment from James Dooney
I like this little pirates tale ! It actually reminds me of my favorite poem ever - that being the rhyme of the ancient mariner ! Well done here buddy !
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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I like this little pirates tale ! It actually reminds me of my favorite poem ever - that being the rhyme of the ancient mariner ! Well done here buddy !
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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Ah thank you James. That is high praise.
Comment from ProjectBluebook
Ahoy me hearties! See--you got some sea salt in your veins. An entertaining and educational read. Held me attention, mate. Me quill scorns me side, this was some ride to turn the azure tide. Write me some more--matey, I'm no mutineer, I got concubines and a privateer. nice job!
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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Ahoy me hearties! See--you got some sea salt in your veins. An entertaining and educational read. Held me attention, mate. Me quill scorns me side, this was some ride to turn the azure tide. Write me some more--matey, I'm no mutineer, I got concubines and a privateer. nice job!
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2014
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Thank you Wackydo, then let's sail the seven seas and do what'ere we please.
Comment from Kenneth Schaal
It was an enjoyable read. I believe the Irish accent gained you some leeway with the meter, but an easy read it was. The story actually gained interest, crescendos, as it developed sonnet by sonnet; many flag in the middle. I wish you best of luck in the contest. Kenny
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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It was an enjoyable read. I believe the Irish accent gained you some leeway with the meter, but an easy read it was. The story actually gained interest, crescendos, as it developed sonnet by sonnet; many flag in the middle. I wish you best of luck in the contest. Kenny
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thank you Kenny.
Comment from Dean Kuch
All right Mr. 'T'! A rip-roarin', sea faring pirate adventure, and a sad, poignant story of how a moribund boys tragic life causes him to turn to the high seas for looting and pillaging. It ultimately ends badly for him at the end of a British magistrates rope in the gallows.
BRAVO! Excellent Crown of Heroic Sonnets entry, my friend. In my humble opinion, the best I've read yet!
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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All right Mr. 'T'! A rip-roarin', sea faring pirate adventure, and a sad, poignant story of how a moribund boys tragic life causes him to turn to the high seas for looting and pillaging. It ultimately ends badly for him at the end of a British magistrates rope in the gallows.
BRAVO! Excellent Crown of Heroic Sonnets entry, my friend. In my humble opinion, the best I've read yet!
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thank you Dean. That really means a lot.
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You are very welcome, Tom. It's a magnificent poem, especially the dialect. I neglected to mention how well I felt you pulled it off.
Comment from Preston McWhorter
Hi, Treischel,
As far as I can tell without meter scanning just by reading the poem aloud this meets the meter and rhyme requirements and the repetition requirements you specified, also the requisite structure. An amazing piece of work which I award 6 virtual stars. I really enjoyed this sea going tale. Sorry you had to hang. Be on the right side of the law next lifetime.
Preston
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Hi, Treischel,
As far as I can tell without meter scanning just by reading the poem aloud this meets the meter and rhyme requirements and the repetition requirements you specified, also the requisite structure. An amazing piece of work which I award 6 virtual stars. I really enjoyed this sea going tale. Sorry you had to hang. Be on the right side of the law next lifetime.
Preston
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thanks Preston. How did you guess my previous reincarnation? No wonder it was so easy to write! Yea sure! This was real work.
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I did not say it was easy. It is all I can do to approximate one sonnet. I was just wondering how you came up with all of the detail about a sailing life. I have been regarded as doing research when all I did was take a few lines from wikki and talk about them figuratively.
Preston
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Ah, I just read a book called The Pirate Wars by Peter Earle
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Dear Tom - I think my head was swimming amongst your sonnets - how do you do that???? LOL Great post, solid rhyme and meter (I'm jealous) I think its a fabulous contest entry, but as you know I am not that great at them, but this one reads silky smooth.
Thanks for sharing it and good luck.
Maureen
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Dear Tom - I think my head was swimming amongst your sonnets - how do you do that???? LOL Great post, solid rhyme and meter (I'm jealous) I think its a fabulous contest entry, but as you know I am not that great at them, but this one reads silky smooth.
Thanks for sharing it and good luck.
Maureen
Comment Written 21-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 21-Mar-2014
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Thank you Maureen. I appreciate you input, this was no picnic, I assure you. I considered it a challenge. But I do like how it turned out. :-)
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Amazing my friend - :)
Hugs
m
