Behold This Child
For my godson's christening65 total reviews
Comment from ravenblack
You don't need to apologize for the simplicity of the poem. I mean, it could not be a rogue piece. Well, it could, but then you would probably end up in the Baptismal font. Congratulations on being honored. I'm sure your poem added to the occasion. And what a smile on the baby boy's face.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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You don't need to apologize for the simplicity of the poem. I mean, it could not be a rogue piece. Well, it could, but then you would probably end up in the Baptismal font. Congratulations on being honored. I'm sure your poem added to the occasion. And what a smile on the baby boy's face.
Comment Written 04-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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Thank you very much, Raven! No, I think you're right that I should leave the rogue at home for this one. :)
Comment from RGstar
You don't have to apologize. Any work from you , however simple is good work.
A really nice sentiment and well constructed poem given the occasion and the joy it brings.
Congrats on your new title.
Beautiful baby.
Good write,
Best wishes,
RG
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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You don't have to apologize. Any work from you , however simple is good work.
A really nice sentiment and well constructed poem given the occasion and the joy it brings.
Congrats on your new title.
Beautiful baby.
Good write,
Best wishes,
RG
Comment Written 04-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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You're very kind, my friend. Thank you so much, RG! I really appreciate that.
Comment from Alan K Pease
I think you were doubly honored to become a godfather and the leading poet of this child's life. The poem is extremely readable so it will not be too many years before he can read it himself.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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I think you were doubly honored to become a godfather and the leading poet of this child's life. The poem is extremely readable so it will not be too many years before he can read it himself.
Comment Written 04-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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Thank you so much, Alan. I really did want to make it a very 'readable' poem to all. I appreciate it.
Comment from adewpearl
What a lovely photo :-)
excellent use of abcb rhyme
I love the behold this child/we hold this child pattern
Great use of verbs in your penultimate stanza
Your friend is going to be so happy he asked you to write this poem, my friend! Get it nicely framed with the photo and you have the perfect gift, also :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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What a lovely photo :-)
excellent use of abcb rhyme
I love the behold this child/we hold this child pattern
Great use of verbs in your penultimate stanza
Your friend is going to be so happy he asked you to write this poem, my friend! Get it nicely framed with the photo and you have the perfect gift, also :-) Brooke
Comment Written 04-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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Thank you so much, Brooke! Yes, he said they're going to frame it with a picture of Wynn. I appreciate your inspiration of writing for Sawyer.
Comment from paulah60
What a beautiful poem, David. From all you've said, I assume you don't have children yourself, yet you've managed to capture the essence of what parenting is about, or should be, in an ideal world, anyway:
'We hold this child -- to let him go,
But first we clutch him near
To clue, beseech, encourage, teach
And whisper in his ear.'
Wise words indeed.
Parents who are sterling role models, or ones that fall short, impact on, but aren't the only determiners of the kind of parents we become. I believe that retrieving, getting to know, and developing all aspects of the inner 'family' (child, nurturer, protector) play a large part in effectively parenting a child (because you're effectively 'parenting' yourself. And no matter how old we are, that need remains).
I really like that your poem conveys the reality of the journey awaiting this child ('Before that cage of time and rage Became our mortal foe.'), but then the wish in those precious last words imply and remind that when love holds us, we can get through anything.
Soulfood!
Cheers
Paula
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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What a beautiful poem, David. From all you've said, I assume you don't have children yourself, yet you've managed to capture the essence of what parenting is about, or should be, in an ideal world, anyway:
'We hold this child -- to let him go,
But first we clutch him near
To clue, beseech, encourage, teach
And whisper in his ear.'
Wise words indeed.
Parents who are sterling role models, or ones that fall short, impact on, but aren't the only determiners of the kind of parents we become. I believe that retrieving, getting to know, and developing all aspects of the inner 'family' (child, nurturer, protector) play a large part in effectively parenting a child (because you're effectively 'parenting' yourself. And no matter how old we are, that need remains).
I really like that your poem conveys the reality of the journey awaiting this child ('Before that cage of time and rage Became our mortal foe.'), but then the wish in those precious last words imply and remind that when love holds us, we can get through anything.
Soulfood!
Cheers
Paula
Comment Written 04-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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Hi Paula. You're right, I don't, but he's my second godson. My first just graduated college, so Wynn can take over now. Thank you so much for your kind words, my friend, as well as your always insightful reviews. Cheers. D
Comment from tfawcus
A fine poem. The alternating first lines swing from the wonder of the child ('The prism of a dream') to the joys and responsibilities of parenting ('To clue, beseech, encourage, teach'). What a splendid toast at the end!
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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A fine poem. The alternating first lines swing from the wonder of the child ('The prism of a dream') to the joys and responsibilities of parenting ('To clue, beseech, encourage, teach'). What a splendid toast at the end!
Comment Written 04-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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Thank you very much, my friend. Much appreciated, Tony!
Comment from skye
What a beautiful poem for a child's beginnings, and a tribute to the coming life.
The ending is powerful. For love to hold this child is the universal prayer we have for the children of the world.
Excellent.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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What a beautiful poem for a child's beginnings, and a tribute to the coming life.
The ending is powerful. For love to hold this child is the universal prayer we have for the children of the world.
Excellent.
Comment Written 04-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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Thank you so much, skye! I really appreciate it!
Comment from ragamuffin
An awesome sentiment and poem. Truly exudes how children are our future as well as carry a piece of ourselves into the future. Lovely worded, hopeful and uplifting piece. I like the two key phrases of "we hold" and "behold." They really make the reader take note and add strength to your words.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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An awesome sentiment and poem. Truly exudes how children are our future as well as carry a piece of ourselves into the future. Lovely worded, hopeful and uplifting piece. I like the two key phrases of "we hold" and "behold." They really make the reader take note and add strength to your words.
Comment Written 04-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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Thank you so much, 'muffin, for your wonderful review. I truly appreciate it!
Comment from Norbanus
I love the flow. For all we know
this verse could shape the child.
In future years, when time for tears
these words could bring a smile
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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I love the flow. For all we know
this verse could shape the child.
In future years, when time for tears
these words could bring a smile
Comment Written 04-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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Thank you so much, Fred, for your great review, my friend. Love your verse.
Comment from STEPHEN A CARTER
LOVE THESE LINES:
A godly light of depth and sight, internal rhyme
The prism of a dream. love this line
"... cage of time and rage
Where all will stall, lose ground, and fall internal rhyme
To raise each glass, and wish en masse " "
Well done. Impeccable meter as usual.
Regards:
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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LOVE THESE LINES:
A godly light of depth and sight, internal rhyme
The prism of a dream. love this line
"... cage of time and rage
Where all will stall, lose ground, and fall internal rhyme
To raise each glass, and wish en masse " "
Well done. Impeccable meter as usual.
Regards:
Comment Written 04-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2014
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Many thanks, Stephen, for your sixer, and for your validating words!
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Dear M: Always a pleasure. Well deserved. Just posted 'Table 34'. Thanks.
Cheers: Steve C
