I will do it tomorrow....
A mothers grief and procrastination10 total reviews
Comment from nelliesellie
I love the poem. It is one of mothers greatest grief. I will do it tomorrow makes a mother want to scream. But she will lose her voice if she screams every time she hears it. Great work. Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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I love the poem. It is one of mothers greatest grief. I will do it tomorrow makes a mother want to scream. But she will lose her voice if she screams every time she hears it. Great work. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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her son has died and she cannot bring herself to clean his room out. I am afraid no one got my meaning so this poem was a learning experience for me.The mom will do it tomorrow, thanks for the review
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I am so sorry. I got it wrong. If I as that Mother I would not worry about cleaning that room at all.
Comment from highlander104
Anyone who has lived through a child's teenage years only to loose that child can relate to this very short story.
Good luck in the contest.
Jean K.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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Anyone who has lived through a child's teenage years only to loose that child can relate to this very short story.
Good luck in the contest.
Jean K.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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thank you, you are the first to realize that the kid has died and it is the mother saying tomorrow. Everyone thought it was the kid delaying cleaning his room. big learning lesson on this one for me thanks for the review.
Comment from Judy Couch
I actually like your five word title more than I like your five word story. It tells me more and spikes my curiosity about what will be postponed until tomorrow.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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I actually like your five word title more than I like your five word story. It tells me more and spikes my curiosity about what will be postponed until tomorrow.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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Her son has died and she cannot clean out his room. She will put it off until tomorrow, thanks for the review, Judester ps nobody got this one and thought that I was talking about merely a messy room.
Comment from Brumar97
Can't argue with you on this one... I have two teens and two other kids. It seems like something is missing; however, where the comma is... it trips up the rhythm a little bit. Thank you for sharing:)
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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Can't argue with you on this one... I have two teens and two other kids. It seems like something is missing; however, where the comma is... it trips up the rhythm a little bit. Thank you for sharing:)
Comment Written 27-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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Her son has died and she cannot bring herself to clean out his room,,,, I will do it tomorrow ... nobody got this one and thought that I was talking about a messy room, thanks for the review, Judester
Comment from c_lucas
This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read. There s very good imagery and descriptive scheme. Good luck in your contest.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read. There s very good imagery and descriptive scheme. Good luck in your contest.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2014
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you know the kid is dead right? reviewers think that the kid just left his room dirty, but actually the mother cannot bear to clean up..I guess it seemed more dramatic in my head, cheers thanks for the review
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Yes I did. You're welcome.
Comment from Patti R.
I feel this has too much information attached to deem the five words the entire story.
Your description above the title is crucial to understanding the meaning of the 'story.' Otherwise it could mean that a teen's room is simply messy as usual and as most teen's are wont to do - the cleaning up is procrastinated.
But because of your description we are given to believe that grief plays a part - that perhaps the teenager has passed away.
- teenagers - so more than one teen occupies that room? Or do you mean teenager's?
- space after comma, although the comma isn't needed at all.
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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I feel this has too much information attached to deem the five words the entire story.
Your description above the title is crucial to understanding the meaning of the 'story.' Otherwise it could mean that a teen's room is simply messy as usual and as most teen's are wont to do - the cleaning up is procrastinated.
But because of your description we are given to believe that grief plays a part - that perhaps the teenager has passed away.
- teenagers - so more than one teen occupies that room? Or do you mean teenager's?
- space after comma, although the comma isn't needed at all.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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thanks for the review. I see what you mean. It is one teenager that has passed and the mother cannot bear to clean out the room. Question marks somehow turn up instead of apostrophes when I send. cheers Judester
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I found that today, too. When I posted from the Basic Editor it converted all my apostrophes to question marks. But not when I used the Advanced Editor - I sent a note to Management, maybe they can fix that.
Comment from l.raven
Hi Jude, I have a daughter who was this way...made me crazy...but she went off the collage and has now given me two beautiful grandkids...I guess I will forgive her...a great poem..well done
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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Hi Jude, I have a daughter who was this way...made me crazy...but she went off the collage and has now given me two beautiful grandkids...I guess I will forgive her...a great poem..well done
Comment Written 25-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2014
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The son has died and the mother cannot touch his room, thanks for the review Judester
Comment from Cajungirl
What a wonderful story, so much said here in only five words. According to the young, There is always tomorrow, that is the best part about today. LOL
Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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What a wonderful story, so much said here in only five words. According to the young, There is always tomorrow, that is the best part about today. LOL
Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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Thanks for the review. Her son is dead and she cannot clean his room, Judester
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How very sad.
Comment from queenv
Good five lines, the teenagers never finished complete cleaning their rooms. They do say, I will do it tomorrow. Cute dog! Well written!
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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Good five lines, the teenagers never finished complete cleaning their rooms. They do say, I will do it tomorrow. Cute dog! Well written!
Comment Written 25-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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The son is dead and she cannot clean his room, Thanks for the review Judester
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Thanks fo rthe clarification, even sadder!
Comment from Domino 2
How true this is in most cases, and usually the 'beloved' parents let them off with a stiff word and a semi-blind eye. Maybe some prefer a quiet life. :-)
I'm no grammar expert, but I'm pretty sure you don't need the comma after, 'room', and as it reads, there is a space missing.
Excellent original theme, and I wish you good luck. Ted
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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How true this is in most cases, and usually the 'beloved' parents let them off with a stiff word and a semi-blind eye. Maybe some prefer a quiet life. :-)
I'm no grammar expert, but I'm pretty sure you don't need the comma after, 'room', and as it reads, there is a space missing.
Excellent original theme, and I wish you good luck. Ted
Comment Written 25-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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Her son is dead and she cannot clean his room, thanks for the review Judester
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That's terrible.
